


Dogged Determination: Rebellion

by Africanwilderness



Series: Dogged Determination Series [2]
Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Angst, Animalistic Magnetism, Established Relationship, F/F, Fighting Back, Fluff and Smut, Heroine's Journey, Hurt/Comfort, Impulse Control, In The Genes, Omega Verse, Pack Hierarchy, Past Rape/Non-con, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rape, Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-14
Updated: 2019-09-21
Packaged: 2019-11-18 04:41:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 31
Words: 56,847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18113498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Africanwilderness/pseuds/Africanwilderness
Summary: Follows Alex's rebellion against the wrongs done to her and her mate, Olivia, by societies Super Alphas..A fierce and unbreakable force in the fight for equality, morality and consent.Will the determined underdog succeed in changing hers, and every other Omegas, oppressive existence?





	1. Success?

**Author's Note:**

> This may not make complete sense if you haven't read Dogged Determination: Taken, but I hope you enjoy my AU CaBenson.

* * *

My eyes flutter open to a hopeful new dawn, a new day, a new life... I expect to feel different; stronger, more Alpha. _I don’t_ _. Shit!_  

I’m terrified it hasn’t worked, that I’m _still_ the most vulnerable person in this city. I hate the fact I hope some other poor soul has taken my place. _Fuck!_ I swallow the nausea thickly, revolted by my own thoughts.  

I rub my eyes, and turn over, taking in the sublime nakedness of my life partner, my one true distraction. She's tangled in the sheets, her mouth slightly open, her bronze eyes hidden from view.  

I breathe in her scent; her intoxicatingly dominant scent. _My life_ _. M_ _y_ _heroine_.  

I trace my fingers over her lips, her honed cheekbone, into her tussled locks.  

‘Mmmm,’ she breathes as she nuzzles into my touch. She opens her bronze eyes; her breathing already ragged as she climbs on top of me, her nakedness covering mine, her hands pinning my wrists softly as her mouth crushes mine.  

 _God_ _, please_ _!_ my mind howls as I work up the courage to fight her testing grip. _Please!_ I grit my teeth against her lips. I clench my fists and tighten my abdomen as I finally attempt to escape my Alpha's dominant grasp. _Please!_ I beg with every fibre of my being.  

She tightens her grip on my wrists; her beautiful mind comforting and supportive as she pleads for my body to fight hers; to meet her strength, to beat it.  

Every muscle in my body tenses and strains as I try to override my Alpha. 

 _Come on Alex, you can do_ _this._ _.._  

A growl escapes my lips as my muscles scream against hers. _Please!_ I feel the sweat dripping down my temples as I put my entire might into unpinning myself.  

 _Please, my love. You can do this..._ her bronze eyes gaze into mine, as she silently coaxes me to overpower her for the first time.  _Lex!_  

I’m so intent on my task that my Alpha has to show me that my wrists are no longer pinned against the bed. 

 _Jesus!_ I take a deep breath, my hands having dropped back to the sheets once I noticed. I try again. _Just..._ _God!_ I beg my own body, as my wrists begin to lift from the bed, to lift against her grip once more. 

‘Liv...’ I breathe, as tears prickle my eyes. 

 _Keep going!_ my Alpha implores. I do as asked, biting my lip in concentration, as I abruptly flip my life over, my willowy frame suddenly on top of hers, my wrists twisting out of her grasp and pinning hers down to the bed.  

We stare at each other, frozen in fear that this is just a dream.  _Liv..._ I can only breathe as my heroine’s face creases into a heart-warming smile. 

 _You did it_ _, sweetie_ _...._  

As soon as I release her wrists, her dominant embrace engulfs me; tears cascading down our cheeks with earth-shattering relief that I am _finally_ free.  


	2. Back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Olivia and Alex talk.  
> Liv tries to heal. Alex helps.
> 
> Back to Liv's POV.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter will contain slight spoilers for Dogged Determination: Taken.

One month earlier 

We're finally discharged from the secure hospital unit. Even though Fin could’ve left two weeks ago, Alex, a couple of days later, they both stayed with me; their pack leader.  

My incredible Omega stayed by my side for the entirety of my treatment and ongoing recovery. I admonished her more than once for this but my Alexandra Cabot would _not_ be moved.  

I was too ill to fully appreciate her heat. It went without incident, for the first (and second) time in her life. This newfound ‘normal’ solidified her determination to transition.  

Her transition _is_ priority one.  

It didn't take long to convince the pack that sentencing the strays, investigating our latest hell, showing ourselves in public in any fashion, is far too dangerous whilst Alex remains a pure blood Omega. The latest incident was example enough that even I, a very powerful Alpha, cannot protect my Omega's when the numbers rank 100 to 3.  

Alex, Kate and to a lesser extent, Fin, have had numerous conversations, with Liz and George present for guidance. Our next transition meeting is scheduled for this afternoon, once we have settled back in to Donnelly’s cabin. 

Secretly, the guilt gnaws at me every time I catch my Omega’s eye. There’s a deeply troubling sea of responsibility swimming in her iridescent orbs, that won’t cease.  

I _hate_ that I drove that feeling into her soul; caused Alex to fear for her life, the lives of her Alpha and Fin, her fellow Omega, to the extent her heart gave out. 

I _hate_ that Fin, our forever loyal wing man, experienced a beating and sexual assault so severe, his soul has been irreversibly scarred for the rest of his life. 

I _hate_ that my most important people have suffered such heinous experiences and yet, they are _nursing_ _me_.  

My supposedly Alpha body is still pathetically feeble and weak from my own assault at the hands of a biro wielding psycho, hell bent on raping, perhaps even killing my Alex.  

I close my eyes and swallow down the bile threatening to violate my mouth. I feel my life caress my cheek comfortingly. Disgust ripples thru my veins as her loving touch sparks angry tears in my eyes.  

 _I don’t deserve your love!_ my mind snaps, my heart dying as my life partner recoils in surprise. Only when my pack swivel round to stare at me, shock and concern written upon their faces, do I realise how adept I’ve become at hiding my thoughts from them... until now. _Fuck!_  

‘Liv?’ Alex whispers, hurt radiating from her cloudy blues. 

‘Stop the car,’ I request caustically. 

‘Hey...’ Alex tries once more, raising her healing hands to my face. I rebuff her touch and shy away from her body; groping for the door handle before I suffocate under the crushing guilt.  

I wince, the pain cutting thru me, as I try to escape the car too quickly. I take a ragged breath, hoping the consuming rage surging thru my blood will quieten before I hurt someone; rupturing relationships and my injuries in the process. 

We’ve stopped a mile out from Liz's cabin, in a wooded area hidden from view. I lean on a rotting tree stump and breathe in the moist air, wishing for the first time in forever that I was alone. 

My life gets out of the car. I can’t help but watch her as she approaches me, her enthralling beauty as intoxicating as the day we met. She leans against the same tree stump, beside me; worry furrowing her brow as she bites her lip with uncertainty. I _loathe_ that I’m causing her this discomfort. 

My Omega remains blissfully quiet, affording me absolute silence; a momentary reprieve from the packs near constant verbal and mental chatter.  

I clench my jaw in an attempt to stem the eternally ready tears _. I hate myself_ . I turn my head away, to hide the steady stream flowing unchecked down my face. My chest shudders despite myself. _Jesus, Lex. I’m so sorry..._ _So._ _.. sorry..._ I finally succumb to the soul-destroying guilt choking me. I cover my face in shame. 

I feel my life cup my jaw and delicately remove my shielding hands, before steering my bronze to her cloudy blues.  

‘My love,’ she whispers with such genuine endearment, my heart splinters. ‘You did _not_ cause this; _any_ of this.’ I open my mouth to protest but Alex silences me with a cool stare. ‘You saved me, _again!_ You willingly put your life at risk to save me,’ she continues as she thumbs my tears away. ‘You couldn’t have done more. When will you _realise_ that the _only_ reason, I’m _still_ alive is because _you_ are my _Alpha!_ Without you, I’m _nothing_...’ 

My Omega’s words snap me back from the alluring depths of despair. ‘Hey,’ I voice, mirroring my life’s actions, my fingers brushing at her tears. ‘You are _everything_ to me; to this pack. Without you, this...’ I gesture between us and our people in the waiting car. ‘... wouldn’t be happening,’ I state with absolute certainty. 

‘Without me, you would be living your life, being the amazing Detective, you were born to be; fit and healthy. I...’ 

‘I was _born_ to be your Alpha. You made me see colour for the first time,’ I stress as I cradle her beautiful face in my hands. ‘I would rather have one breath of your hair, one kiss of your mouth, one touch of your hand, than a lifetime without _it!’_ I take a shaky breath. ‘Don’t you _realise_ how _much_ I love you!’ 

 _Oh Liv,_ Alex melts into my touch. My arms envelop her body as we kiss and nuzzle each other; reaffirming our relationship, our love, our oneness.  

 

We eventually arrive home. As soon as the vehicle stops, my life pulls me out and leads me to the house.  

 _Wait,_ I command, wanting to make sure our only haven is still ours. I look over to Fin. He’s by my side in seconds, his piece cocked and ready. 

Once we complete our sweep, the pack descends on the kitchen. Only Alex and I swim against the tide, my hand firmly in her grip as she pulls me to our room.  

‘Are you sure...?’ I ask tentatively, trying to swallow my aching desire. 

‘Of course,’ Alex replies, misunderstanding my question. 

‘I mean physically, Lex? I don’t want...’ 

My life looks me straight in the eye. ‘We’ve waited _months_ to truly touch each other. I’ll tear this place apart if you don’t let me touch you... _now!’_ Her eyes blaze with primal intent.  

 _Jesus!_ I gasp, my knees buckling. 

‘Also, the doctor cleared me for physical activity. Recommended it, in fact,’ she continues, laying out her argument expertly.  

I can’t win, neither do I want to. _Christ Alex!_ I breathe as my body shakes with animal anticipation; ripples of exquisite need radiating thru my every nerve-ending   

Our embarrassment at knowing the pack will overhear us, secondary, to the privacy this haven provides us to _finally_ and entirely give in to our carnal urges.  

My Omega pushes me gently onto the bed, my injuries negating my lead. It has been months since we’ve truly touched one another. Even during Alex's heat, being in such torturous proximity; a single brush, a single stroke would have ended our torment. But we couldn’t succumb due to the 24 hour surveillance _and_ the very real risk of derailing our recovery.  

With the doctors sign off, and our overwhelmingly, surging desire almost blinding us; there is no firmer certainty then _right now_.  

I try to control my anticipation as Alexandra Cabot tears her clothes from her magnificent body; her iridescent eyes never leaving mine, her evident hunger alone pushing me to the brink. I fumble with my shirt buttons and attempt to remove my pants but agonising pain shoots thru me.  

‘Relax, my Alpha,’ her husky voice flicks my swollen clit. ‘Let me...’ Alex continues, knowing _exactly_ what she is doing to me. Molten heat scorches my core as every fibre of my being aches for my Omega’s touch; for release. I exhale a ragged breath as she pulls at my pants; her lips and tongue exploring my belly button as she tears my panties from my body and unclips my bra, with vigour. 

A moan escapes my lips as her fingers tease my nipples. ‘Please, _sweetie_...’ I utter breathlessly, begging my life to end our months of enforced chastity; my fingers raking thru her flaxen mane in desperation.  

Her tongue immediately laps at my ultra-sensitive nub, thirstily licking and sucking me over the exquisite edge of reason. My body convulses thru multiple eruptions of cataclysmic pleasure so violent and all-consuming; I fear I won’t live to see the devastation left behind.  

My life doesn’t relent in her duties. In fact, she doubles her efforts; scribbling her fingers either side of my quivering clit, entering me with two more that instantly locate and stroke my front wall, as her tongue and lips continue to orchestrate the pleasure radiating thru my starving centre. 

My body arches and squirms innately, my insides clenching and contracting as I suffer the enviable fate of Alexandra Cabot taking me mercilessly.  

What feels like hours later, my Omega finally tires, her thumb tickling me thru a final, lung-bursting orgasm as her mouth travels up my body, suckling my nipples and neck column on route to my lips.  

I inhale a soul-shattering breath seconds before her mouth locks with mine, knowing I may not inhale again for an eternity. Her teeth nibble my lips before her tongue duals with mine, stoking my already scorching desire to fever pitch, once more.  

I feel Alex shudder against me, direct stimulation not necessary to make her experience the shooting stars of sky-high ecstasy. Even so, my fingers trace her willowy frame, stroking here, tickling there, until they make thorough contact with her wetness.  

My Omega's body immediately spasms at my touch. I hear her whimper against my lips as a torrent of unparalleled pleasure bursts thru her every fibre.  

I use every ounce of strength to flip my life over; simply unable to maintain my submissive stance one minute longer. Alex gasps against me as my body lays on top of hers, my hips thrusting futilely against her centre. My fingers continue to stroke her clit, leaving her utterly defenceless and at my mercy; in the throes of irrefutable climax so searingly volcanic, her flesh scorches my skin.  

 _‘Plea...se...’_ my Omega begs as I fumble in our bedside cabinet with my free hand; her head thrashing against the pillows in open desperation. 

I find and attach my member quickly, wasting no time in thrusting myself inside her depths. Alex outwardly screams in ecstasy, causing me to gently gag her with my hand, as I slow my thrusts to a devastatingly teasing pace.  

‘Okay?’ I whisper, my forehead against hers as I release her mouth. All my Omega can do is nod, her eyes glazing over, as I slowly stroke her to the edge of oblivion.  

Her arms encircle my neck innately. Though, she immediately releases me when she notices the pain flicker across my features.  

‘Sorry,’ she husks breathlessly, her eyes suddenly clear and completely engaged, her concern wholly evident. I kiss her forehead, her eyelids, in silent answer as my hips buck more earnestly against her, my member nestling deeply inside her. 

Alex wraps her legs around my waist to increase the friction between us, to deepen the thrusts; her hands gripping my biceps for purchase. 

 _‘Jesus fucking Christ!’_ she exclaims as I hit her sweet-spot. My hand clamps down on her mouth once more, as I continue with shallower thrusts to tease her to distraction. I watch as my life partner’s eyes roll with the first embers of unimaginable orgasm; my own body twitching with the promise of exquisite release.  

My hand continues to silence my Omega as my hips give several teasingly slow and final thrusts to finish us; our insides freefalling into an earth-shattering abyss of endless, all-consuming pleasure. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The paragraph where Liv proclaims her feelings is from the film 'City of Angel's.'


	3. Transition Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The pack discuss Alex's transition.

I’m roused by a soft knock on the door. I shake my head slightly, hoping it's a mild form of tinnitus that will cease. When the sound becomes more insistent, I lever myself up, grabbing some clothes for decency before heading to the offending door, gazing at my sleeping beauty on route and stubbing my toe in the process. _Fuck!_

I open the door to find the only person who would dare interrupt. Liz. I step forward, making her back up, to give my life the privacy she deserves.

‘ _Jesus_ Liv, calm down!’

‘Huh?!’ I growl rudely, rubbing the sleep from my eyes.

Liz ignores me. ‘It’s 3pm. We gave you some extra time but this is ridiculous,’ Donnelly holds her ground, as any Alpha worth her salt, would.

I may be pack leader, but I have the grace to blanch, knowing they’re waiting for us. ‘Sorry. I’ll just get us some gloop, then we’ll be right with you,’ I promise, about to step past Liz for the kitchen. She stops me, stuffing four packets into my hands before sidling off with a smirk.

 

Ten minutes later, Alex, Fin, Liz, George, Kate and I are sat round the kitchen table.

 

Over the last couple of months, Kate has shown herself to be not only a loyal ally but a godsend. With Huang’s specialism being psychiatry, Kate stepped into the 24/7 clinician role; a role she gleefully accepted.

Her admiration for Alex was endearing but also slightly unnerving. When Kate examined Alex for the first time, I watched her like a hawk as the good doctor peeled my life’s hospital gown back.

I noticed her trembling hands as she listened to my Omega’s heartbeat, knowing this was _the_ test that would either enter, or refuse, her into the pack.

Kate did everything possible to avoid touching Alex but eventually my life grew impatient. She grasped Kate’s hand and held it to her collar bone; her iridescent eyes staring into emerald green; both of them waiting with baited breath for the doctors reaction.

Kate’s entire body shuddered, her pupils dilated and her breathing shallowed; _sure_ signs of arousal. But once Alex released her hand, the doctor kept hers in place until she regained control of herself. Once Kate’s shallow breaths subsided, she withdrew her touch.

We inhaled a collective breath.

 _You passed doc,_ Alex approved silently, wondering if Kate could hear her.

We realised something during this interaction. Alex was happy to invite Kate into the pack. But, _only_ when I agreed did Kate finally hear our inner voices.

After all the good doctor has done for us, as well as she and I having a history due to her own case four years back; she and my Omega having a shared kinship of heinous trauma, particularly at the hands of Bob Ashton. Kate was welcomed.

 

Our fully fledged pack now sits around us. I look at each member, recalling what they have done, given up, lost, to be here, part of this. I love all of them in their own way, _even_ Liz.

 _We all agreed Alex can’t attend sentencing until she’s transitioned. Correct?_ Liz asks the floor.

The group affirm.

_The only problem I have is Petrovsky breathing down my neck, saying sentencing should have been served weeks ago._

_I think our circumstances are unusual to say the least and so, surely, understandable?_ Alex interjects.

 _Yeah!_ Fin adds passionately. I glance at him briefly, itching to squeeze his hand but knowing I mustn’t.

 _This can’t be rushed to appease one impatient judge,_ I state evenly.

 _Agreed, but Petrovsky has a point. All your..._ Liz glances toward Alex. _... hard work could be for nothing if she decides to be a bitch about it and call a case review._

 _That’s ridiculous,_ Kate adds.

 _It’s the law, honey,_ Liz says, soothingly. I’ve grown particularly fond of their relationship, knowing Liz recognises so much of herself in Kate. I’m more than comfortable with Liz being Kate’s Alpha, of sorts. It relieves some of the pressure laden on me.

 _Surely, if I speak to her..?_ Alex suggests. Losing the case, causing a review, after _everything_ , is not an option.

_Lena won’t speak to you here and there’s not a chance in hell of you going back there..._

_I’ll call her,_ Alex decides _. Plus, their human rights aren’t being violated..._ Alex pauses a moment, her disgust evident as she takes a breath. I move to comfort her but she raises her hand to stop me. _... because they’ve been convicted_.

I adore how she takes control of potentially catastrophic situations. My Omega is _far_ from helpless. She senses my approval. She gazes at me for a full minute; the expression in her eyes consuming me.

A sharp kick to the shin from Fin's boot brings me back. I look up to find everyone staring at us. A blush floods my cheeks. _Sorry._

 _This can’t be rushed, Liz. This is too important,_ Alex states, seriously. Liz nods in agreement, her eyes softening in understanding.

 _I’ll see what I can do to make Lena back off,_ Donnelly promises.

 _Nicely?_ I ask weightedly.

Liz smiles at me. _Aren't I always?_

 _Thank you,_ my Omega exhales deeply, interrupting us before we go all Alpha. She pauses a moment, her features uncertain before she glances at me. _I need to talk about something,_ Alex changes tack, as much because the previous topic is concluded as to avert admiring eyes away from us. _I’m wondering how this will work. How and what I’ll need to do to successfully transition? What will happen afterwards? What and who will be affected..?_

 _I think before we look into that, we should talk about the options of who may wish to help you transition_? George speaks for the first time.

His intelligent words cause us to pause. I notice Kate shake slightly, nervous and self-conscious because the pack knows she would happily die to be in the same _breathing_ space as Alex, let alone have the very real possibility of intimately touching her, to aide her transition.

Fin shrugs his shoulders, to help the reddening Kate. _You know I’m in Meg but it'll be a while before I want someone to touch me, even you!_ he half jokes, the seriousness of his words bobbing just under the surface.

 _Okay,_ I say, not at all surprised or disappointed _._ Fin needs time to heal and there’s no way we won’t give him that time. I’d _kill_ to ensure its respected.

Honestly, part of me is relieved. The idea of my lesbian Omega dominating a straight, traumatised and very much loved, like a brother, Fin, makes me shudder slightly with revulsion; thoughts of incest nauseate my gut. I know from _private_ conversations with Alex, that she also has a preference. Fin is too close, _too_ loved.

I know if my life is completely honest with herself, and in turn, if I'm completely honest with myself; Kate is a beautiful, intelligent woman with emerald green eyes that could turn the straightest woman gay. The prospect of Alex mating with Kate enrages and intrigues me, but _not_ in equal measure.

I turn to Alex who is watching Kate. Kate is looking everywhere but at us. ‘Kate?’ Alex uses her voice to win the doctor’s attention. Her green eyes wide as saucers as she drinks in my Omega. _Would you rather we speak alone?_ my life offers, endlessly empathic.

‘No, I think that may be worse,’ Kate admits as a jolt travels thru me.

‘Meaning?’ I ask, my protective instincts immediately triggered.

 _‘Liv!’_ Alex's voice pulls me back.

‘Olivia!’ Liz is right behind her.

‘I mean, this can’t get anymore embarrassing. I’d feel nervous talking to you about it without Liv being present. That’s what I meant,’ Kate explains herself, her anxiety plain to see.

‘I’m sorry Kate. It’s just this subject... it makes me twitchy,’ I apologise, my bronze orbs meeting racing green. I feel cloudy blues on me.

 _I can only imagine how uncomfortable this is for you..._ she states, recognising the impact this transition will, IS, having on me. _... and you, Alex, someone who shouldn’t have to touch another human being unwillingly, ever again._ Her emerald orbs dive to her lap.

_I have to be honest with you, even though you may already know this. I want to touch you. I want to kiss you and give you pleasure. I want to be your Alpha, your life partner, your everything._

I feel George eyeing me cautiously. I swallow thickly to halt my dominant urge to beat the hell out of this challenger. I notice Liz shift slightly, priming herself to protect Kate.

‘Breathe, my love,’ Alex intervenes, grabbing my hand fiercely.

 _But you have an incredible Alpha; the most caring, gentle and supportive partner an Omega could ever wish for._ I’m relieved I didn’t climb over the table to fulfil my innate response. _I don’t want to get between that. You guys are intoxicating to watch. You’re beautiful together._ Kate shakes her head, aware she is rambling. _If this is too awkward, I’ll..._

 _Kate, Liv and I have discussed this. We are both..._ Alex struggles to find the appropriate word. _... supportive of this but only if you are too. If you’re uncomfortable, we can stop this conversation right now. And we want you to know which ever option you decide, you’re one of us and you’ll remain so_. Alex’s cloudy blues see only emerald green in this moment. _We’re also aware that by doing this, you’re forgoing your own right to transition. I will not take that decision away from you._

I gaze at my Omega with every ounce of my adoration.

_I’ve already thought of that and even though I’ve experienced my own traumas, they pale into insignificance when compared to..._

_Don’t, Kate. Please. Never minimise or diminish what you’ve been thru_. A silent tear flows down my life’s beautiful face. Kate follows suit. _I’m no more worthy than you, Kate. No more._

 _You have the opportunity to change the lives of every Omega. There is no decision to make,_ Kate assures us. _Plus, I’ve wanted you since the moment I read about you!_ The pack giggles, relieving some of the tension.

 _Are you wanting this Alex?_ George asks intuitively.

 _Yes_ , my life stresses, her shoulders squared as she glances at me, before a shadow crosses her features.

_What is it, sweetie?_

Alex licks her lips self-consciously before looking at Liz. _What if this doesn’t work? I’m terrified my scent will change, that Liv won’t find me as intoxicating as..._

‘The dynamic of your transition will be slightly different due to you not being in a relationship. But as long as you initiate, you will successfully transition. To make absolutely sure, I’d suggest you not only initiate but dominate the encounter,’ Liz states, her tact left wanting in her haste to reassure us. I watch the heat flush Alex’s cheeks as Kate clears her throat self-consciously. I shift uncomfortably, lacing fingers with my Omega.

 _This needs to be spoken about guys_ , George says, carefully.

‘Not with me around it doesn’t,’ Fin interjects brusquely as he rises from the table.

 _Omi?_ Alex checks in.

 _Fine Meg. Just don’t need to hear this_ , he says plainly before leaving the room.

I round on Donnelly. _Ever heard of tact, Liz?_

_Blame my years as a fierce Alpha and egotistical judge. I’ve grown edges over time._

_No shit!_ I growl, unimpressed with her complete lack of discretion.

‘ _PENIS’ AWAY!_ ’ my life barks, silencing the both of us. ‘Just think of your audience a little more Liz.’

Alex’s voice strikes the cord mine can’t. It gaols me. I bite my lip and gaze into my Omegas eyes, to silence my verbal and mental chatter.

Liz continues, having nodded her head in acquiescence. ‘Trust me when I say, yes, your scent will change, but not between you and your life partner,’ Liz says with utter certainty. _You are paired. Life partners. No matter what your transitional status, you’re a pure blood and you will remain so..._

Alex swallows thickly. _So I’ll become a pure blood Alpha?_

 _Yes,_ Liz confirms, vehemently. _You’ll become the most powerful status there is. Only the purest of Omega’s have the opportunity to become pure blood Alpha's. Perhaps it’s natures way of rebalancing the odds, Donnelly states thoughtfully. A pure blood Alpha. You’ll be magnificent._

The entire table turns to Alex. My life exhales deeply as she processes Liz's thoughts.

‘I think I’ve heard enough for one day,’ my Omega confesses as she moves to leave the table.

‘Alex,’ George halts her retreat. ‘Want to talk to me?’ My life turns to him, nodding her head silently as tears shimmer in her eyes. ‘Could everyone apart from Olivia go for a drive somewhere? I have a feeling our leading ladies are craving privacy, in body and mind.’

After my affirming nod, Kate heads to find Fin as Liz stops by Alex, uncertainty foreign on her features. _Sorry if I'm a little forceful. I just see the benefits..._

 _Growing soft in your old age, hey Liz?_ I quip, knowing Donnelly never apologises.

 _I just know if or when your Omega transitions, she’ll be top dog, not us_. A cheeky glimmer returns to her eyes as she leaves the room in search of her pups.

_Clever bitch!_

_You know it!_ she retorts, effortlessly lightening the mood.

My heart melts on seeing a reluctant smile cross my Omega's achingly beautiful face.


	4. Vexed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Olivia, Alex and George talk.
> 
> Caution with this content as rough sex and termination are discussed.

As soon as the front door slams shut, Alex starts pacing the kitchen floor in earnest, her fingers anxiously running thru her hair, her mind so utterly overwhelmed, _neither_ George or I can get a firm enough grip on one particular focus before her mind goes off on another tangent.  

I stand to take her in my arms but Huang stops me with a glance. ‘Don’t Liv. You can't always protect her. Sometimes you’ve got to let her work it out.' _Sage words_. But I soon feel the bite of my nails, finding it incredibly difficult to see my life so distressed. 

I inhale a deep breath to still my own, ratcheting anxiety as Alex finally stops her pacing. My Omega gazes into my eyes with an expression so heavy, so exhausted, I audibly whimper. 

 _Tell us, sweetie. Please_.  

Alex sits down several stools away from us, clearly begging for space.  

‘All my life...’ my Omega pauses for a moment, a lone tear trailing down to her cheekbone hollow. I dig yet more nails into my palms, to stop myself gathering her up in my arms and whisking her away from this place; from everything and everyone. ‘All my life, I’ve been alone. I’ve been in crowded rooms where every single persons a stranger,’ Alex stops again to lick her dry lips. ‘I’ve never had friends; people I could trust. I didn’t know _how_ to trust, _who_ to trust. I’ve always handled things alone. I’ve had to.’ _Oh Alex_ _._ ‘People have _always_ told me what I _should_ do, what they _want_ me to do, what they _will_ do to me, what they _are_ doing to me, what I _am_ _!_ ’ my life sniffs as she gazes into my soul. ‘Even though I know this is the right thing to do, I feel _that_ , even now,’ my life shares one of her many core anxieties. 

‘You’re feeling pushed? Told? Forced?’ George takes over as my mouth works silently, my eyes seeing _only_ my Omega. 

‘Pushed? To an extent yes; by Liz, by Lena, by the mob who almost killed _my_ Alpha, _my_ Omega; _everybody_ , including me. Forced? No. Told? No.’ Alex pauses in thought, her eyes moist in open despair. ‘I think expected is more appropriate. I’m _expected_ to transition flawlessly and then everything will be better for everyone, right?’ Alex poses it as a genuine question.  

I look to George but he’s looking at me. ‘I guess...’ 

‘But what if this doesn’t go flawlessly? What if I’m broken? Too broken for transition to happen? What if I scare Kate during..? What if I scare myself? What could I be capable of? What if this changes me completely? If I can change status, surely that means my conscience can change? My preferences? My _orientation_ even?’ she states so utterly overwhelmed, my lungs seize. ‘What if I don’t _want_ or _need_ you after this?’ Alex continues, tears escaping her exquisite orbs and flowing unhindered down her cheeks.  

I move to say something. George grabs my arm, silencing me. 

‘Here, now, I _know_ what and who I am...’ 

‘And who and what are you?’ Huang asks softly, his hand firm on my forearm. 

‘I’m... I...’ my life buckles under the weight, tears cascading riotously down her features. Huang's hold is suddenly vice like. ‘I’m... I’m a 33-year-old, pure blood Omega, attorney...’ 

‘Go deeper,’ George cajoles gently, utterly at odds with his grip. 

Alex shakes her head, not wanting to go deeper. Even so, her lips begin moving. ‘I’m a vessel for non-consensual sex. My sole genetic purpose is to _submit_ to the nearest pull person. To breed... To _fucking_ _breed_. I couldn’t even do  _that_ _right!_ _’_ my life barks, her head suddenly in her hands.  

My heart plummets as I try not to shrug Huang off me, to go to her. _Stay!_  

‘I’m broken, George. I'm so broken...’ 

‘Why Alex? Why are you so broken?’ 

My Omega takes a shuddering breath. Only seconds before she speaks, do I realise what she's going to say. _Oh_ _God_ _Alex!_  

‘Because I actually _like_ being dominated! I _like_ Liv being rough with me. I _like_ being taken... _violently_. What the _fuck_ does that say about _me_ as a _person?_ _’_ Alex spits the last word. 

Huang only falters for a moment as I swallow thickly, wondering what the hell he must think of us... of me.  

‘Alex, you’re the purest of Omegas. You are a rare species. You have found an as endangered partner, one with a conscience, who happens to be Alpha,’ George states, having enough faith in me to know I haven’t, _wouldn’t_ _,_ ever take advantage of Alex. ‘You are an incredibly rare pairing. As such, your innate role in to submit, and Olivia’s innate role is to dominate. Therefore, is it any wonder? And being dominated and violent sex are two diff...’ 

‘But, I’ve wanted Liv to ravage me... to... to... take me... to the line...’ my life verbalises what we have been meaning to discuss with George, for months. Even so, the lack of thorough preparation and my shock that we are doing this, today, leaves me out of sync with my Omega. It's an uncomfortable feeling _._ ‘I _want_ , _need_ Liv to be rough with me, particular around my time of the month...’  

I shut my eyes as the shame creeps up my cheeks. I open them to find my Omega gazing at me for permission. _My Alpha,_ _c_ _an I?_ I bite my lip, knowing this needs to be said. I nod my head once. 

‘I wish to stress, Liv has _never_ stepped over _any_ of my boundaries. Before you think...’ my Omega lowers her head in shame. 

‘I’m not thinking anything other than you being an incredibly brave couple to share this with me,’ George states congruently, his hand still gripping my arm, silencing me. 

‘One time, we were so... _involved_... that somehow Liv's hand ended up around my throat, pinning me to the wall. Liv immediately started pulling away but I pulled it back, replacing her fingers around my neck,’ Alex confesses as she raises her head to look at the doctor, her features twisted in disgust. ‘I _wanted_ her to strangle me,’ she whispers as I gasp, ignorant of this soul-destroying detail _. L_ _ex.._ _?_  

‘Lex,’ I breathe as Huang near breaks my arm with his vice like grip. Alex avoids my anxiety ridden features.  

‘For what purpose?’ George takes the one angle I haven’t thought of.  

My life is thrown by the offbeat query, expecting Huang to be repulsed by her admission. She stares into gentle, black eyes as she deciphers his question. ‘I didn’t want Liv to kill me,’ Alex clarifies promptly. ‘Over 22 years, I’ve learnt most Alpha's like to beat me; inflict physical pain. Raping me isn’t enough. It turns them on _even_ more. I wanted to arouse my Alpha...’ 

 _We both know it worked and I hate myself for it._ _But, Alex, I was already..._ I stop myself, remembering our thoughts aren’t private. 

‘Go on Olivia,’ George allows, his hand finally releasing my arm.  

I turn to my life; my beautiful Omega. ‘I was already _insanely_ aroused Lex. I...’ 

‘As was I, but putting your hand around my neck... almost... made me... orgasm,’ Alex discloses with a wince, hating herself for the words currently streaming from her soul.  

‘ _Holding_ your neck almost made _me_ climax,’ I admit as we stare into each others eyes, our sickness laid out on the table. Mortification flushes my cheeks as a dull throb pulses between my legs. 

‘You were both _mutually_ aroused by holding or being held in this way?’ George asks for clarification.  

We tear our eyes away to nod at Huang.  

‘So, if you were mutually aroused by it, and consenting, both understanding it wasn’t to strangle or cause you to lose consciousness, which aspects are you uncomfortable with?’ George asks my Omega, his tone so non-judgmental, so comforting, we could be talking about the weather; not me gripping my life partner by the throat and us both being aroused by it. 

Alex is also surprised by the ease in which this conversation is happening. She threads her fingers through her flaxen mane whilst biting her lip. I ache for her. My life glances at me, her eyes conveying similar sentiments.  

‘It disturbs me that I find _that_  arousing.’ I share her discomfort and say so. ‘I’ve lost count of the number of times someone’s throttled me, choked me, sometimes until I’ve passed out. But, I’ve _never_ found it arousing until Liv.’ 

‘So could it have been Liv's touch on your neck, over the act itself, that aroused you?’ Huang enquires delicately, not wanting to trigger Alex to cut this conversation off prematurely.  

My life immediately shakes her head. ‘No. And I know Liv agrees with me on this,’ she says as I nod my head, affirming her assumption. ‘I’ve never felt more aroused in my life, than _that_ night. It was as though we both completely gave in to our innate urges; Liv's, to brutally dominate, and mine, to be brutally dominated,’ my Omega explains it so eloquently as I feel George’s eyes on me.  

 _Yes, George._ _Exactly as Alex_ _says_ _it_ _,_ I admit freely. _I wanted to_ _... I wanted to,_ _not only dominate her_ _,_ _but take ownership of her, make her mine,_ _tear her limb from limb and devour every last inch_ _of her flesh until we were one._  

I watch my life nod her head vigorously in agreement. _And I wanted her to..._  

 _That’s the difference here. You both wanted to become one,_ _consensually._ _I_ _ha_ _ve no doubt you'_ _ve_ _succeeded._ _It'_ _s_ _the reason we can he_ _ar_ _you and each-other._ _.._  

 _Liv_ _also_ _pinned_ _me that night_ _. And I don’t mean cutely._ Alex interrupts him, her thoughts now too deep to stop. _My Alpha pinned me_ _from behind, leaving me utterly_ _defenceless_ _and unable to fight, do anything_ _,_ _but take her thrusts._ _I wanted her to_ _,_ _goaded her_ _to. I c_ _heered her on. I needed it!_ my life confesses passionately. _Does that make me sick? Disturbed? Beyond help?_ my Omega asks, desperately grappling with her psyche. 

 _No Alex,_ George reassures her. _And you know why?_ Alex shakes her head, her brows furrowed in confusion. _Because our first sexual experiences_ _(consensual or otherwise)_ _, can shape our entire_ _perception of sex_ _for the rest of our lives. Puberty is an incredibly important time. And I’ll be careful when I say this because this most certainly_ _is_ _not a blanket_ _statement, bu_ _t_ _those formative years_ _can_ _shape our sexual appetites_ _,_ Huang continues, his eyes conveying compassion and understanding. _Your experiences, coupled with your innate status, meshed into a_ _need that only Olivia_ _can sate._  

 _But this is where_ _another_ _problem lies George,_ I say, to arch it back to the reason behind this entire conversation. Alex gazes at me lovingly as I out my non-Alpha stance. _I_ _wasn’t_ _comfortable with that night. My boundaries had been crossed. I thought I'd raped my life!_  Alex vehemently shakes her head. _Holding my Omega by her throat, grabbing and pinning her wrists behind her back_ _and thrusting into her blindly in that moment... it terrified me_ _. That..._ _that Alex wanted me to treat her like that. That I wanted to treat her like that._ I glance at my life, feeling my chest heave as the guilt crushes me like a battering ram.  

Alex can’t stay away a moment longer. She proceeds to sit on my lap. 

 _Really?_  

 _Really! It’s the only way I ca_ _n_ _think_ _to_ _show you how unafraid of you I am, how much I love you and how stupid I was not to think of your boundaries..._  

 _And what_ _do you_ _think of Olivia's boundaries_ _, Alex_ _?_  

My life turns to face Huang as she fingers the hair at my nape. _Jesus Alex!_ She stops. 

 _They tell me what I already know. That Liv's an incredible_ _Alpha_ _who will never hurt me._ _But she’s scared of completely owning her status._  

 _Is that what terrifies you? You feel potentially_ _boundary-_ _less, so with the very real possibility of becoming the most powerful_ _Alph_ _a in this household, possibly in existence,_ _you’re afraid of what you may be_ _come?_ George asks insightfully _._

 _Yes!_ Alex agrees passionately, her breath catching, as I nuzzle her temple.  

‘You’re terrified of _owning_ your status?’ 

‘Yes,’ Alex repeats as she rubs her check against mine.  

 _What do you fear becoming?_  

 _Honestly?_ my life looks at me before voicing her inner most fear. _I’m terrified I’ll become the product of all that’s been done to me_ _. I have been taken in every way you can imagine, and in many ways you can’t._ My heart twists painfully. _I have so many images in my head, so many scars on my body to remind me._ _What if my_ _entire_ _world flips and_ _I_ _become what I have feared my_ _entire life?_ I feel Alex tighten her hold around me. I continue to nuzzle her as tears flow to my jawline.  

 _Okay, what is the worst thing you_ _ha_ _ve_ _ever_ _done to a person?_  

My Omega pauses for so long.

 _I..._ _uh... I_ _terminated my baby..._ _I’m so sorry_ _Liv, I’m so sorry._ My lungs seize. It breaks my heart that my Omega is apologising for the fact we are both children of rape. Her baby would have also been so. 

 _My love,_ I whisper as Alex collapses into my arms, her body and soul utterly desolate. _There is nothing to forgive. Nothing!_ _What happened, needed to happen,_ _for_ _their_ _sake.._ _._  

George and I meet each-others gaze, over my life’s head. It scares me to see emotion in his eyes. I bite my lip to stem my thoughts.  

 _Alex?_ George tries. My Omega turns to him, her body trembling involuntarily. _What life would your baby have had?_  

This one sentence is enough for Alex to dissolve into breathless whimpers as she attempts to halt her ready nausea. My life swallows several times as wave after wave crashes into her. 

I feel tears drop to my chest as I embrace my Omega with every ounce of love I possess. _T_ _his is why you will never be..._ _wha_ _t_ _you fear._ _You feel_ _. You empathise. You_ _love_ _,_ I whisper into her soul as I caress her cheek and thread her hair. _And I’ve never met a more incredibly kind, compassionate, forgiving and loving human being in my life._ _I love you so damn much!_  


	5. Alphas will be Alphas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Olivia and Liz have a huge misunderstanding.
> 
> As requested by M x

As the days pass, I begin suffering chronic cabin fever; my innate need to be on the move, useful, utterly stifled by our situation, and my injuries.

Following a conversation with the pack, its agreed I'll go foraging for supplies, alone. My need to walk more than 90 feet is so unbearable, even my Omega can’t keep me grounded.

Following the last few months of continual company, my hunger for space is tearing me apart. The constant conversations and psychoanalysis are emotional exhausting. I pray for one day without the mention of rape, of the heinous crimes committed against my life partner, against my Omega.

Knowing my Alex has Liz and Fin, calms my nerves.

Leaving the house, alone, is both exciting and unnerving. I feel lost yet found, as I drive through the narrow lanes to join the main roads of Upper New York.

 

2 hours later 

I arrive back at the cabin, having gone on a longer road trip than intended; the freedom and fresh air curing my constricted psyche and limbs in equal measure.

I unload the car, surprised when Kate and Fin, not Alex, greet me.

‘Where's Alex?’ I ask, my innate wish to reconnect with my Omega, absolute.

‘Asleep, I think,’ Kate answers as they help carry the supplies thru to the kitchen. ‘Should you be carrying those?’ she asks pointedly; us both knowing I shouldn’t be.

‘Just stretching my muscles, doc,’ I half joke, though I roll my shoulders as soon as I put the bags down.

The Omegas begin storing the food away as I go in search of my life.

I quietly open the door and scan the room. _Where are you?_

I back out of our bedroom, noticing the only other closed door leads to Donnelly’s room.

‘That’s it,’ Liz says in hushed tones. ‘Just like this.’ _What the fuck?!_ My heart lodges in my throat as I force the door. My lungs seize at the sight that confronts me. A low whine of utter shock escapes my lips.

Liz is almost straddling Alex, pinning her down by her wrists on the bed, her face within inches of my life's face.

‘Li...’ Alex gasps as my body moves of it’s own volition, barrelling towards Liz as cataclysmic rage consumes me.

I grab Liz by her hair and wrench her off of Alex; my mind blank but for a seething, rioting rage so potent, I know I will kill her.

My limbs shake with adrenaline as I pick Donnelly up off the floor and throw her into the opposing wall. The uber Alpha crashes into artwork and lamps as I instantly stalk her, thirsting for blood.

I speak thru actions, my mind howling incessantly, as I pick the judge up off the floor and pin her to the wall, my hands encircling her throat. Her eyes plead with me, her breathing ragged and strained. Donnelly’s hands tear at mine as she tries to release herself.

I hear someone snarl. I realise it’s me. I’ve never felt more furious in my life. I intensify my hold against her jugular, wanting to snap her in half.

A palm lands on my back. I shake it off dismissively. _Let’s end this!_ my mind is suddenly clear as I tighten my hold still further.

 _Li..v...!_ they howl at me. I ignore them. I see only my target, my competitor, my prey.

My face is within millimetres of hers. _You’re dead!_ I snarl as my hand becomes vice like around her neck. 

Someone grabs my arm, desperately trying to stop me killing Alex’s attempted rapist. _The fucking..._ I push them away, barely registering the crash that follows my forceful shove.

I suddenly feel something. I look down, subconsciously watching as Liz repeatedly kicks my shins. The pain doesn’t register but my grip lessons on her throat as my body innately slackens in response to her brutal assault on my person.

I finally relinquish my hold; my body stepping back of it’s own accord, retreating from the source of the pain.

In the next instant, I’m on her again, beating her face with every ounce of strength I possess.

Something hits me. It takes a second to realise Liz has struck me back. I check for injuries and find blood. I glare at her. Donnelly meets my gaze, her arms raised in a silent plea; her mouth is moving but no sound emanates as I charge her again.

Suddenly, I feel unsteady on my feet, a glancing blow from the side rocking my centre. I stare as Liz approaches me, her hands splayed and cautious as she tries to...

 _No!_ I roar as I lunge forward and pin her against the wall again, my forearm buried in her throat column as I retrieve my hidden piece from my waist belt and dig the muzzle into her cheek.

My arm trembles as surging adrenaline and molten rage scorch me. I observe the fear dilating her pupils. _Fear me, you fucking bitch!_

I cock the weapon; her breath dancing hurriedly across my skin as I finally turn to my life.

 _My life._ Her beautiful lips are moving but I can’t hear her. She obviously realises as she slowly approaches us, her hands raised in a calming, non-threatening gesture.

Alex caresses my cheek; her touch mellowing my seething anger and stilling my trembling limbs.

I breathe for the first time since opening the door. All my senses abruptly awaken, causing my ears and mind to flood with wails of _Stop! Don’t Liv!_

‘Liz was helping me, _Liv!’_ Alex’s voice permeates them all. My eyes feast on her exquisite features, her wide eyes, her overt fear. ‘She was showing me how to successfully transition!’ her tone afraid, desperate, terrified.

I turn back to Donnelly; her face ashen with terror, tears coursing down her face as my piece digs into her flesh.

‘My love, Liz was helping us. Helping me,’ Alex continues, trying frantically to stop this horrifying event.

 _Helping?_ I finally answer.

 _‘Yes!_ Helping!’ my life repeats as I stare into Donnelly’s dilated eyes.

 _Helping..._ I slowly withdraw my gun from her cheekbone, my forearm from her throat. Liz drops to the floor as I lower my weapon and stand mutely; pain abruptly spasming thru every inch of my skin. I collapse to the floor beside Liz.

Kate tends to Donnelly as my life cradles my face. _I was safe and I am safe, my Alpha. Liz was helping me with my technique to... to reduce the amount of time I... we..._ Alex cuts herself short, not wanting to offend Kate as she explains why Liz was on top of her, pinning her down.

 _Why... the fuck... would you do that... without me?_ my thoughts finally coherent.

‘Because...’ my life briefly gazes in Liz's direction, behind me. Her face pales. ‘Because were weren’t thinking. It just sort of happened and... I don’t... I’m sorry, my Alpha. I can’t imagine how that looked when you...’

 _I thought Liz was... raping you_ , I inhale a steadying breath, my chest seizing, my throat choked. Tears flow forcefully down my cheeks as I try to comprehend what’s happened; my actions.

 _I know, my Alpha._ _Liz was showing me some techniques as she’s the only..._ Alex stops herself, not wanting to rile me further. _It was stupid to try it without you. I’m sorry my love._

 _She wasn’t hurting you?_ I ask, still not entirely convinced.

_No Liv, she wasn’t. I’m fine. But you’re not._

_Nors Liz,_ Kate adds from behind me. My stomach drops as I try to turn to them.

 _She wasn’t attacking you?_ I repeat, my nerves shot and my psyche frayed as I take in the crumpled form of Donnelly.

My Omega threads her fingers thru my hair, grounding me. ‘No, Liv.’ Her cloudy blue eyes gaze into my soul, begging me to believe her. ‘Liz was trying to help. I realise now it wasn't...’ she tails off as shuddering sobs engulf me. _Oh, my heroine._  Alex pulls me into her arms. _Jesus! I love you._

‘I’ve got a pulse,’ Kate breathes with utter relief. ‘We can’t call an ambulance...’ _because this is our only safe space,_ everyone affirms. ‘Fin, help me get her to the car.’

_Jesus Christ! I’m sorry._


	6. Calm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex explains herself.

As soon as Liz is secured in the car, Alex pulls me back towards the house; the rest of our pack, bar Huang who is still working, heading towards Bellevue.

 _Come,_ she whispers softly, guiding me to our ensuite. My life sits me down on the bath ledge; she squats in front of me as she assesses my injuries.

Alex looks at me silently for a full minute, her chest heaving as her mind works overtime, thinking of what to say and how to say it.

Finally she settles on: ‘I’m sorry.’ Her iridescent eyes instinctively draw mine. ‘I can't explain how it got to that point but it certainly wasn’t sexual,’ my Omega stresses. ‘She was showing me how to get the best results, most quickly and...’

My heart is in my mouth as I watch and listen to my Omega try to explain why I found another Alpha, a _powerful_ Alpha, an Alpha within my _own_ pack, on top of her, on said Alpha’s bed, in a position that turned my blood to molten rage.

‘Liz has only ever tried to help us,’ my life continues, nibbling her bottom lip and threading a hand thru her hair with clear anxiety. _She wasn’t doing anything I wasn’t allowing her to do..._

‘Why did she have to show you? Why couldn’t she have told you? ’I ask the question that has been pummelling my senses since the moment I saw them.

‘Because she was trying to make me fight her, to show me I have more strength than I thought I did, after all these years...’

‘I hate that she was _touching_ you!’ I spit, before I can stop myself. ‘I can smell her on you now. It... it _repulses_ me,’ I admit as my Omega winces in shame.

‘I’m sorry Liv,’ Alex apologises again, her hand reaching up to cup my face. ‘I know you’re under incredible pressure, to protect me, the pack. Liz wanted to take some of that pressure away and he...’

‘You _keep_ saying she was trying to help, but all I saw was an uber Alpha _dominating_ my Omega!’ I snarl, standing to evade her touch. ‘I couldn’t _stand it!’_ I begin to pace the tiny space as Alex watches me; her expression, heartbroken. ‘I know I over-reacted, well I _will_ know at some point but right now, I feel demoted, useless, excess to requirements.’ I can’t stop the anger, the sadness, the hurt from pouring from my lips.

I know I’m being selfish. I know Liz wasn’t planning on taking Alex, as so many others have. I know this because Liz's mind was clear of wanton thoughts, of desire. _Her mind was clear._

_I know. It’s the reason I allowed her..._

_I’m guilty of beating one of my own. How the fuck do we come back from this? Especially when I know her actions were honest, if fucking antagonistic! Fuck!_

_My Alpha..._ Alex steps towards me.

I shoo her away. _Don’t ‘my Alpha’ me right now! I... I don’t deserve it!_

_Liv..._

_Lex,_ I stress to get her undivided attention. _I wanted to beat her. I have from day one. As soon as I smelt her higher dominance, I felt unworthy, unsafe, untrusting and above all, suspicious of her intentions towards you,_ I confess, looking into my Omega's cloudy blues. _I know she’s no danger to you. I truly believe that. But after today, I know I can beat her, if there’s ever a need to. And as sick as it sounds, I feel relief for knowing that._ Tears spring to my eyes at this heinous truth. One of our pack is currently being rushed to hospital and all I can think about is that I beat her, for my Omega’s virtue, but as importantly, to show the entire pack and myself, once and for all, who’s boss. I beat Liz to solidify my dominance over my Omega, over my pack.

I see heat swirling in those beautiful orbs. _And you want to know what’s sicker?_ Alex asks, raising a brow. _I wanted you to stamp your authority over her. I wanted you to dominate her. But..._ I stop my pacing, swallowing hard. _... you went too far Liv._

I lower my eyes. _I know._

 _Liv?_ She waits until I meet her eyes once more. _I’m going to attempt transition tomorrow._ My life raises a hand to halt my protests. _It’s my decision. I can’t continue to watch my impact on you health. I can’t handle you tearing yourself, and others apart, because of me. I’m the common denominator_ , Alex pauses to inhale sharply.

 _And I can’t keep going over the what ifs. I’m tired of talking,_ the exhaustion apparent in her eyes. _Kate and I have discussed how best to do this. We’ve come to a decision that I think will cause you the least distress..._

I stare at Alex, trying to ignore the fact decisions have been made without me, by thinking it’s probably best they were made without my input. Because my input would have stalled this entire venture. The thought of Kate experiencing my Omega in her most vulnerable form, terrifies me.

 _Kate’s agreed to being tied up so she can’t lose control and dominate me._ My eyebrow arches at the thought, the ingenuity of it. _George and I think its best you’re away from the cabin. We were going to send you off with Liz, for obvious reasons... but..._

 _You must hand over ALL your weapons and Fin will arm up. You go out for a while, outside of mind-reading range at least, until you hear from me. Specifically from me. George will stay. He won’t be affected, because of his preferences, and he won’t try to kill Kate. He can also pull me off if I get too... involved._ I swallow, hard.

 _Is Kate terrified of me?_ I ask, hating that half the pack will be now.

Alex just looks at me, her iridescent eyes challenging my stupid question.

I step towards her slowly. _Are you terrified of me?_

 _You’re a formidable Alpha, Liv. But, I know you’re a pussy cat wanting the love only I can give you,_ my life voices, knowing like no other, how to melt my soul.

I stand directly in front of her. _I hate that part of myself,_ I admit softly as I lean my forehead against hers.

 _But without it, we may never have been,_ Alex purrs.

_So you like my bat shit crazy side?_

_Olivia._

_I’m sorry, my Omega. I’m so sorry._

_I think you’ll need to say this to Liz, not me,_ she suggests as she runs her fingers thru my hair. _But from my lowly Omega perspective, you can’t be any hotter if you tried!_ I laugh at this, as we nuzzle each other, reaffirming our relationship after hours apart; after such a tumultuous scene.

_I love you, Alexandra Frieda Cabot._

_I love you more, Olivia Magdalena Benson,_ my life infuses passionately before she pulls back slightly to look into my eyes. _Now, let me clean you._

My Omega dampens a cloth in one hand and takes my jaw in the other. Her eyes, intent on her task, illuminate with every wipe of the cloth. I drink in every inch of her intoxicating features, as my life cleanses my battle scars.

 _It’s not broken,_ she whispers after thoroughly checking my nose. I sit silently, enjoying her light touches as she continues examining my face.

Alex’s phone rings as she’s about to check my side and shins. She stands abruptly, noticing Fin's number dancing across the screen.

‘Omi?’ My Omega gazes at me as she listens to details of Liz’s condition. ‘Okay, thank God!’ she voices, as relief floods me. _Jesus!_ ‘I’ll let Liv know... she’s fine... a few scraps but... I will,’ she ends the call.

I look up at her. My heart still batters my rib cage, even though I know Liz's alive. I knew. I felt her heart beat until the car was out of range. Still, I inhale a steadying breath. 

_She’s awake and nothings broken that won’t heal. She’s asking for you..._

I stand and envelope her in my arms. _Jesus, I’m so sorry Lex!_

 _I’m more sorry. It was stupid and..._ she breathes into my neck, her arms holding me desperately.

_I can’t be like that again..._

_You won’t be..._

_Tomorrow..._ we think, in unison. My heart stutters but my head understands. This needs to happen, for everybody's sake.

After several minutes of breathing each others scent, of comforting one another, Alex pulls away.  _Now get to Bellevue and grovel before round two gets someone killed!_

_But you’ll be alone..._

_I’ve been alone every second of everyday, until you._

I smile sadly, pulling my life close for a soul-stirring kiss that almost knocks my entire trajectory.

_Liv!_

_Are you sure about tomorrow?_

_As sure as I’ll ever be. Now go!_ Only my life partner can order me like that.

 _Say ‘my Alpha’,_ I request as I retrieve my leather jacket and gingerly place it around my shoulder.

 _Only if the first time I dominate you, you wear this,_ Alex barters expertly, tweaking the zip of my jacket.

 _Deal,_ I agree wholeheartedly, my breathing ragged.

 _I love you, my one and only Alpha,_ my life acquiesces immediately.

I walk to the front door, my Omega directly behind me. ‘Oh and Liv, don’t be overly long. I need you tonight. _All_ night.‘

It takes everything to walk away from my life partner as she promises unparalleled heaven for eight hours straight.

_Give Liz my love._

_Maybe not..._

_Liv!_

_Lock the doors, sweetie,_  I softly remind her as I jangle my keys, reticent to leave.

We hear George’s car, right on cue. My breathing eases.I tear my eyes away from my Omega, before I lose the strength and will I need to leave her.


	7. Bitter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Olivia and Liz talk.

I've been sat by her bedside for 20 minutes, getting more frustrated and impatient with every passing second. But I also know to wake her could genuinely spook her, with her last image of me being: my forearm buried into her neck, my fury within millimetres of her, before she lost consciousness.  

My muscles beg me to move, to release some of the excess energy still stored in their depths, following our altercation.  

I stand and pace the room, hoping my less than quiet steps will wake the sleeping Alpha. I really should give her this time to rest and repair. But every second I waste here, is time I’m not with my Omega. 

Finally, Liz's eyes flutter open, causing renewed anxiety to course through my aching muscles. 

I sit back down before her eyes truly focus, to not alarm her. ‘Hey Liz,’ I say, announcing my presence before she startles.  

Donnelly’s eyes watch me thoughtfully for several minutes. I stay silent, wanting to respect her need for time. 

‘Olivia,’ she eventually whispers, as I swallow sharply, uncertain of how to proceed.  

‘You wanted to see me...’ I coax, wanting the injured Alpha to take the lead, for now. 

'You’re a fucking bitch for attacking me like that, but you needed to.’ 

‘What?’  

‘I’d rather you attack me than Kate.’ Dawning begins to hit. ‘If you’d assaulted her in the manner you did me, you’d have snapped her in two,’ Liz continues, her voice raspy as a result of my actions.  

I stand and pick up her glass of water, offering her the straw. She shakes her head dismissively before regretting it. I sit back down, redundantly.  

‘I wasn’t planning to assault Kate like that,’ I counter, firmly. 

‘Oh, come _on_ Olivia! The whole idea of Alex's transition is driving you crazy and you needed to let off steam, against someone who could take it, before you tore the entire pack apart!’ Liz states fiercely as she maintains eye contact with me. 

‘What the _fuck_ does that mean?’ I query aggressively, wondering how the hell this conversation will improve. 

‘It _means_ we have two powerful Alpha’s, soon to be three, and two highly intoxicating Omega's; one being the most potent aphrodisiac in existence. How was that _ever_ going to end well?’ Liz asks, glaring at me frostily. ‘It’s not; especially in such close quarters,’ she continues, wincing as she rubs her throat. 

‘Do you want the straw now?’ Donnelly glares at me before mouthing ‘yes'. I give her the straw. She sips for several beats.  

‘Thank you,’ Liz has the grace to appreciate my small gesture. 

‘Why were you on top of my Omega, Liz?’ I ask through gritted teeth, my jaw clenched to breaking point. 

Liz takes a final sip of water before I put the glass back down on her bedside table.  

She takes a deep breath before she trains her eyes on me. ‘Several reasons: I wanted you to let off some steam before Alex’s transition, so you’d be less likely to attack or kill Kate. I wanted to know which of us is the stronger Alpha, but most truthfully...’ Liz pauses for too long as my heart beats out of my chest. ‘I wanted to test my scent on Alex, to see if I could sway her to be my Omega,’ Donnelly admits bravely, her expression utterly serious and her eyes fearless in their direct challenge. I inhale a shuddering breath. ‘Alex is the life blood of this pack; not you, not me. Whoever has Alex, has the pack. I didn’t survive _everything_ to submit to a _born_ Alpha,’ Liz spits the word, her disgust clear. 

I gasp at her words, her meaning. ‘You don’t think I deserve Alex, or the pack, do you?’ I ask, incredulous and seething.  

‘You didn’t know what horror was until you met her. You didn’t have a clue about the hierarchy and the associated atrocities occurring right under your nose, because you never had a _need_ to,’ Liz continues, completely unable to stem her verbal attack, _even_ as her dominant Alpha stands before her.  

‘You tried to steal my Omega from me, under the guise of helping me let off steam; under the guise of protecting Kate?’ I ask rhetorically, aghast at this woman’s nerve. ‘I came in here, prepared to apologise and to mop your brow, if necessary,’ I state, my voice shaking with quiet rage. ‘The whole time, you planned this!’ I shake my head in numb shock at the sheer effort Liz has gone to, to ingratiate herself into _my_ pack.  

‘If I’d won today...’ 

‘You’d have killed me,’ I finish for her; Donnelly's eyes affirm my suspicions. 

‘... or banished you. Run you out of home and territory. But as it stands, you now have that opportunity...’ Liz states, knowing it will be impossible to remain living under the same roof now.  

‘I’m not like you Liz...’ 

Donnelly scoffs theatrically, signalling her position: injured in a hospital bed. ‘If Alex hadn’t touched you when she did, you'd have killed me, pure and simple.’ I can’t argue her point. I’d have killed her to rid myself of a competitor; a challenger to my Omega, and the pack.  

I snarl audibly as I grit my teeth. ‘What do you want, Elizabeth? You called me here for more than a heart to cold heart,’ I shiver slightly, unable to prevent the unease from engulfing me.  

Liz stares at me intently. ‘I wish to say congratulations. You won. You're the _current_ pack Alpha,’ she states, her voice dripping with sarcasm. ‘My position in said pack is now obsolete, so please either _finish_ the job or get the _fuck_ out of my cabin by the time I’m discharged tomorrow evening.’  

A thought crosses my mind. ‘Did you delay security so _that_ psycho could stab me to death?’ I stare into her eyes, knowing. 

‘I’d have paid the _fucking_ scum, given half the chance,’ Liz barks, as I dig my nails into my palms, to stop me throttling her. 

‘ _Did_ you?’ I repeat, needing classification.  

Liz laughs humourlessly. ‘Yes, I stalled them. I heard _everything_.’ I swallow thickly, trying to halt the ready nausea. 

‘And Fin?’ I grind out, my teeth aching under the relentless clenching. My lungs seize as I wait for the evil, would-be matriarch to answer.  

‘I’d _never_ willingly harm another Omega...’  

I shake my head emphatically before Liz finishes her sentence. ‘Apart from Alex, of course!’ I growl as I watch her try to sit up. I place a controlling hand on her sternum. ‘Lay. Back. Down. Before you hurt yourself!’ Donnelly can only acquiesce.  

‘I would _never_ hurt Agnes!’ her voice rising several octaves in her haste to argue the point. She realises her mistake almost instantly.  

 _‘Fuck!’_ I howl, my fingers threading through my hair as _everything_ suddenly comes into stark and horrifying focus. ‘ _Everything_.... _every_ action, _every_ word was to win back your _Agnes_!’ I pace the room as adrenaline floods my body; seething rage boils my blood. ‘You’re _fucking_ crazy!’ 

‘Maybe... but you _won_ Olivia. Alex showed no trace, no hint of arousal when I pinned her,’ Liz states moronically. _As if_ _she_ _would_ _?!_  

‘Of course _not!’_ I bark. ‘But, I didn’t sense it from you either...’ I wonder aloud. 

‘Of course not,’ Liz parrots back. _‘Years_ of practice, Liv,’ she reveals, sadistically. ‘I can’t tell you how many times I almost...’ 

 _‘Stop!’_ I roar, to drown out her disgusting admissions. I pace the floor once more; sheer hatred coursing through my veins as I stare down the disturbingly calm and collected bitch. 

‘The only reason I invited her and, by default, you into my home was so I could gradually groom her.’ _What the fuck?_ _!_ ‘And obviously to get off, listening to you two...’ 

I advance on her; my hand suddenly wrapped around her throat. _‘_ _STOP_ _!’_ My entire body shakes with the overpowering urge to kill her. 

 _Do it!_ Liz coaxes, her eyes challenging me to see it through. 

‘If you _ever_ touch her again, I will _kill_ you!’ I threaten with every fibre of my being before I storm out of the room, not wishing to share the same breathing space _one_ _minute longer_.  

 _You can’t win, Olivia_ , Liz mind fucks me one last time. _You’re Omega's too prized. Even you can’t save her. I’m sorry._  

A cold sweat radiates through me as I sprint to the nearest exit. I fumble with my cell enroute. ‘Pick up, Lex... _please_ pick up.’ The call goes straight to answerphone.  

Only when I reach the relative safety of my car and step on the gas, do I realise my cheeks are slick from crying. 


	8. Pack

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What will Olivia find when she returns to the cabin?

I careen up the narrow lane. My breathing easing on seeing the driveway clear of vehicles, besides Kate’s and Huang's. 

The wheels screech against the gravel as I come to an abrupt halt; prizing the door open and running to the cabin without a backwards glance.  

I unlock the door hurriedly and listen for sounds. I hear noises coming from the kitchen. I unsheathe my hidden weapon and glance through the ajar door.  

My heart swells as I watch Alex and Fin sharing a joke as Kate kneads some bread. I sheathe my piece and walk through the door, my limbs shaky and weak as the adrenaline wears off.  

‘Liv?’ Alex senses my presence immediately. She’s beside me, cradling my jaw and searching my eyes, within seconds. ‘What’s wrong?’ The others watch me, concern flashing across their features. 

‘Liv?’ George calls from behind me. ‘What’s happening?’  

Seeing my life, my pack, unharmed, causes my vision to blur. Seeing George calms me still further.  

‘Didn’t you get my calls?’ Alex immediately pales.  

 _Shit!_ _I’m_ _..._  

‘It’s my fault, Liv. We were foolin’ around,’ Fin comes to Alex’s defence. ‘What’s..?’  

‘We need to move, _now!_ I’ll explain once we’re on the road...’ I interrupt him, trying to convey an urgency without scaring everybody.  

‘Where can we go?’ Huang immediately understands, asking the most pertinent question. 

‘Anyone have somewhere safe, they've not mentioned?’ I query quickly, wondering if I’m over-reacting. But Donnelly’s parting words haunt me.  

My Omega furrows her brow in thought, her anxiety momentarily forgotten in favour of practical action. _I love_ _you._ Alex iridescent orbs light up at this. ‘I have an industrial property in Brooklyn. I didn’t mention it before because... well... Liz has been so kind.’ 

I nod as I try to stop the shiver of revulsion becoming obvious. I take Alex’s hand in mine as I observe the rest of the pack. ‘Can anyone connect you to it?’ 

My life looks at me quizzically. ‘Only the realtor, and he died a long time ago. It was a private, cash in hand investment.’ _Perfect_. Alex hooks a finger in the belt strap of my jeans, on hearing my silent praise. I kiss her forehead softly, my frayed nerves momentarily forgotten. 

‘Anyone got a better option?’  

The pack shake their heads in unison.  

 _In that case, pack light and be ready to move in the next 10 minutes_ _,_ I order as they disperse.  

Only Alex stays, glancing at me with perceptive eyes. ‘If this has anything to do with what Liz and I were doing earlier this morning...’ 

‘Alex,’ I say, in hushed tones. ‘It has nothing to do with anything you’ve done. Nothing at all. I promise,’ I attempt to reassure her as I graze my fingers over her cheekbone. ‘Now, please go and pack what you’ll need,’ I press, squeezing her hand a final time before watching her stride to our bedroom.  

 

10 minutes later 

I’m driving the pack away from Liz's cabin. We’re using Huang’s car because it’s the only one not used to visit Donnelly today. The vehicle also has blackout windows. _Handy_. 

We watch the streets blur as I take a scenic route to Alex's Brooklyn property.  

‘So, what’s goin' on Liv?’ Fin asks from the back seat, as all eyes assess me.  

I bite my lip, glancing briefly at my Omega, beside me, before I turn back to the road. Alex strokes my leg to reassure me. ‘How long ‘til we get there, Lex?’ 

My life squeezes my thigh as she tries to stop staring at me. ‘It’s a block away,’ she answers, her chest heaves betraying her anxiety.  

‘Let’s get secured and settled first,’ I suggest, as Alex directs me to an single, secure, underground garage.  

 _Why_ _don’t_ _you live here full time_ _,_ _Meg?_ Fin asks the question I'm pondering.  

Alex inhales shakily. ‘Because, with the high-end security and complete alienation from the outside world, no one would know to rescue me if someone actually found a way in. It’s only when I bought it that I realised the entire place is one big safe room, or a holding cell. I’ve never spent more than a night here,’ she voices her heart-breaking truth. I place my hand over hers and squeeze. _I love you._  

‘One of us will always be with you. Always,’ I stress as my life leans into my neck; my scent, reassuring.  

I park and cut the engine. ‘Where to now, sweetie?’ I ask as we survey our surroundings before exiting the car.  

‘That door...’ Alex points to our right. ‘... goes up to my condo. That door is laundry and that one is storage.’ 

We follow her up to her palatial apartment. Kate and Fin stare open mouthed as my life sheepishly shows us around.  

‘Can you see why I didn’t like this place?’ she asks seriously, catching my eye. I nod once, giving her a reassuring smile as I covertly check every room, every locker, every storage cupboard; before I test the windows and doors. 

‘Yeah, sure, Meg!’ Fin replies, in awe of Alex's pad.  

I notice my Omega watching me from the corner of her eye as she jokes with Fin. ‘You can all have your own secure floor if you want, or we can all stay here, together. It’s up to you,’ Alex offers self-consciously, knowing our current surroundings tell us more about Alexandra Cabot than she necessarily wished to reveal.  

‘How about you guys go explore the other floors and give us some space,’ I suggest.  

George nods in understanding as Fin and Kate continue to gawk. ‘Thanks for this, Alex,’ Huang shows his manners and appreciation, as he half pushes the two Omega’s up the next flight of stairs.  

As soon as they’re out of sight, I glance at my life. ‘How big is this place?’ 

Alex understands immediately. ‘Ample to be outside mind-reading range.’ She looks at me, then, with a half fierce, half terrified expression. ‘If you don’t tell me what’s going on...’  

I smile sadly at the magnificent woman before me, taking her hand and steering her to one of the many opulent bedrooms.  

‘Sit down,’ I request before sitting next to her, in a set of expensive, leather evening chairs. My life’s eyes are wide with uncertainty. I loathe that I’m about to add to it. 

I share what Donnelly disclosed during our bizarre conversation. My Omega’s beautiful face pales with each passing second.  

When I reach the part about her safety, Alex stands, too sickened to stay sat any longer. _‘_ _Christ_ _,_ Liv,’ she whispers, turning back towards me, her cloudy blues swimming and iridescent. ‘I’m... I’m _so_ sorry. I... trusted her... after _everything_ with my grandmother... the trial ... our somewhat shared experiences... her clear thoughts... I...’ I stand and wrap my arms around her quaking form, as the reality that darkness infiltrated our pack, hits her core; as it did mine.  

 _Why would she betray my grandmother_ _like_ _this_ _? Why would she do_ _this_ _after everything’s she’s done for us?_ Numerous thoughts batter her psyche with confusing scenarios and impossible explanations. _Why would she... God I feel so dirty. I took a shower as soon as you left but now I... I need to_ _... come with me..._   

Alex leads us to the immaculate ensuite bathroom; the size of my apartment.  

We quickly undress and step into the warm spray. I pick up a thoughtfully positioned sponge and begin scrubbing my Omega’s body, slowly but surely ridding her of all scents but her own. I then shampoo her flaxen curls twice, before conditioning them. I douse her body one final time before I reach for a towel and wrap it around her body, softly dabbing Alex dry. 

Afterwards, we lay spooned on the bed, my nose nuzzled into her hair, as I watch the rapid rise and fall of her chest. 

‘Lex?’ I whisper into her drying mane.  

‘Mmm?’ 

‘Do you want to know why?’ I offer, not wanting to keep anything from my struggling Omega. 

Alex turns in my arms to face me, her features confused and exhausted. She nods, causing her flaxen trellises to frame her breath-taking face. _Breathe_.  

 _Breathe, my_ _Alpha_ , my Omega gazes at me with absolute understanding and reciprocation. _Soon_. I swallow my arousal. 

‘I think Donnelly’s resolve weakened under your scent,’ I begin, my finger playing with a strand. ‘She invited us into her home to break us. She wanted you for herself, but not by force. She wanted you to fall out of love with me, to slowly turn to her, to trust her; somehow. She was confused, blinded by your scent,’ I continue, not breaking eye contact even though the emotions I find swimming there are nearly unbearable to witness. ‘She wanted to groom you; lull you into a false sense of security.’ 

‘But if she wanted to... keep me, why was she so pro transition?’ my life asks, frowning as she tries to understand the incomprehensible. 

‘Because she realised how powerful you are. Liz wanted to banish me from the pack and become your Alpha mate,’ I voice the heinous truth. ‘She was seduced by your likeness to Agnes. Her dreams of becoming a power couple back then were transferred onto you, in the present. And that’s before we think about the impact your grand-mothers death had on her,’ I mention, giving Donnelly this one benefit. ‘I don’t believe she intentionally meant to harm you. But she dropped her defences when she realised she was in the presence of _another_ Pure Blood Omega. It was an incredibly rare opportunity she couldn’t ignore...’ 

‘Surely this means I can’t trust _any_ _one_ _?_ If we could let such a deranged, power hungry bitch into our pack, how can I be certain that Kate is...’ 

‘She’ll be tied down so there is no way she can dominate you at the last minute,’ I say to reassure my Omega. 

‘But she and Liz became close?’ Alex voices the thought I’ve stored in the recesses of my mind.  

‘I don’t wish to pool Kate with Donnelly, just because Liz dotted on her. But if you’re not comfortable with Kate...’ 

‘I can’t bear the thought of having to find and build a relationship with yet another Omega,’ Alex groans in frustration. ‘I need to transition, _now_. Before Liz, or anyone else, can _use_ me. I can’t survive being raped again,’ Alex whimpers, her entire body trembling in my arms. ‘This is so screwed up, Liv. I can’t imagine what it was like for you, being in the same room whilst she...’ 

‘I don’t know how much was down to her pain medication. But Liz was saying _anything_ and _everything_ to enrage me. She was literally goading me to kill her. As though, once I beat her and officially became pack Alpha...’ 

‘You are and will always be my Alpha,’ my life interrupts, nuzzling my neck. I thumb her jawline subconsciously. 

‘I can’t imagine the turmoil and pain Donnelly was hiding. If I lost you, I’d...’ I pause, biting my lip to stem the ready tears. I cough self-consciously as Alex caresses my skin. ‘All whilst suffering the agony of being subordinate to a _born_ Alpha. If only she'd talked to...’ 

‘ _Born_ Alpha?’ Alex's gaze moves between my eyes and lips. 

‘Mmm. She couldn’t stand the thought of being submissive to me, because I’ve _never_ experienced what you and other Omega’s have,’ I explain Donnelly’s closed-minded view.   

‘But you _have_. The proofs on YouTube!’ my Omega tries to help, but succeeds in reminding me. ‘Sorry,’ Alex whispers, clutching me to her. ‘She has no idea about your life, your upbringing, your reasons for deciding on the career you have...’ 

I wince and close my eyes. ‘That’s another conversation we need to have...’  

My life stares into my soul. ‘Tell me, Olivia,’ she pleads, moving to lean on her elbow. 

‘Cragen wants me back on desk duty next week. There’s no reason for me to be off work, now the trial is over and my injuries are healing.’ 

 _Shit!_  

 _Yeah!_  

 _I_ _don’t_ _know why but I always thought_ _you’d be by my side..._  

 _I always will be_ _,_ I stress passionately, as I use a finger to lift her lips to mine.  

Our bodies melt into one scorching mass of liquid heat as I cup Alex's face, deepening the kiss until our cores shiver with achingly delicious need.  

I shudder against Alex's lips as her tongue orchestrates my senses. I slowly unwrap this hauntingly beautiful creature from her towel cocoon; her damp body, the perfect lubricant for my carnal urges as my lips, tongue and fingers explore the perfection of Alex Cabot’s forbidden flesh. _Jesus, Liv!_ she screams silently as I suddenly freeze. _Don’t stop, my Alpha! Please!_ my life begs as her enthralling nakedness thrashes against me, knowing the sheer impact such behaviour has on my starving clit. 

 _Liz..._ I whisper. My Omega suddenly stills, her face confused and hurt. ‘I’m sorry,’ I say to appease her as I withdraw from her intoxicating touch. It takes _everything_. I sit up on the side of the bed and run my fingers through my hair, my anxiety and distress evident.  

 _Liv? What’s wrong?_ Alex asks, moving until she is in front of me, her cloudy blue orbs imploring me to tell her. _Please t_ _ell me_ _,_ she demands more urgently. 

The one thing I left out is now the one utterance I can’t ignore. _Fucking_ _Do_ _nnelly!_ my mind howls as I stand, as much to avoid Alex's questioning orbs as to force Liz's noxious words from my mind. 

My determined Omega doesn't give up. She steps in front of me, her hands cradling my face as tears spawn from my eyes. _My Alpha, let me be here for_ _you!_ I raise my hands to stroke her forearms.  

 _I don’t deserve you_ , I confess as my life thumbs away my tears. 

 _Whose words are you speaking?_ Alex asks, intuitively. 

 _You know who,_ I reply, as gasps of anguish escape my lips.  

 _My Alpha,_ my life partner pleads, _you are the only person who deserves me and I am the only person_ _who_ _deserves you._ She places my hand over her heart. _This and everything around it_ _b_ _eats, breathes, lives for you._ _We are one._ I inhale shuddering breaths as my Omega nuzzles my temple. _I love you, Olivia_.  

 _We will_ _never_ _be one!_ The dam finally burst; my emotions overwhelming me as I tear myself away from Alex’s delicate touch. _We will always b_ _e five_ _o_ _r six or..._ _. We will never have privacy of our own, to be one together, ALONE!_  

Alex’s confusion hits my gut as I watch a plethora of emotions dance across her features. _What are_ _yo_ _..?_  

 _Donnelly got off, listening to us... together_ _,_ I finally disclose the most horrifyingly uncomfortable aspect of the warped judge's confessions. 

The expected shock engulfs my life with undeniable force. I catch her willowy frame as she collapses to the floor; horror and despair etched into every line of her face. _‘No!’_ Alex wheezes breathlessly, waiting for me to deny this heinous truth. ‘ _God_ _,_ _please no!’_  

I envelope her in my arms as my Omega realises just how sick the banished Alpha truly is. The depravity necessary for Donnelly to use our ‘private’ moments for her own voyeuristic pleasure, is near impossible to comprehend.  

 _That’s why she offered us her cabin, over and above her plan to groom you._ Alex trembles in my arms. _She fantasised she was with you_ _;_ _with Agnes_ _every time we..._  

 _Stop!_ she snarls as she bats me away, to stand. _How the fuck could we be so stupid? How could I have been so stupid?!_ Alex centres her blazing orbs on me _. Surely_ _,_ _I should have spotted it? Smelt it? Sensed it_ _?_ _And why were we so blasé in our love-making? What if Fin touches himself? What if Kate...?_ The disgust and rage radiate off her as she stalks the spacious bedroom, picking up the discarded towel to hide her nakedness; feeling vulnerable and exposed. _What the actual fuck, Liv!?_  

I inhale sharply. _You know what I’d be saying to every groomed child, every groomed DV victim right_ _now_ _,_ I stress, trying to appease her misplaced guilt, her shame. _And t_ _hey don’t. They haven’t,_ I reply, never more certain of anything in my life.  

 _How can you be sure?_ Alex counters, her body tensing with all-consuming despair. 

‘Because they wouldn’t be able to hide it from us,’ I voice in a passionate whisper, not trusting our mind conversation to be private. ‘Because they’re Omega’s, there’s no way they could hide their thoughts or actions from us; from me. Donnelly could because she was such a powerful, seasoned Alpha; the highest-ranking member of the pack, hierarchically.’ 

A quiet, rage descends over my Omega. The effects are devastating to watch. ‘This is what she wanted,’ Alex whispers fiercely. ‘She wants you to think about her, _every time_ you touch me. She wants to violate the most sacred aspect of our love.’ Her lips shake with the effort it takes not to cry, not to scream, not to fall apart. ‘We can’t let her take this from us. _Especially_ after all the years of suffering to get to this point.’ The tears start to flow down her hollow cheeks as her entire body trembles. ‘You are the _only_ person I’ve ever wanted to touch, to be vulnerable with, to make love to, to _fuck!’_ My brows rise in overt surprise at her crudeness. ‘I _won’t_ allow her to sully the beauty we have.’ Alex looks at me with such blazing fire, my skin burns under her gaze. ‘You’re going to take me, _now_. Then, I’m going to find Kate and _successfully_ transition. Then _I’m_ going to take you. Then...’ my life smiles with absolute certainty and ruthless determination. I audibly groan in open awe of her. ‘Then, we’re going to take back the control _stolen_ from us!’ 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Your reactions to 'Bitter' got me beavering away all day to make sure I got this chapter uploaded before work starts again tomorrow, in earnest. 
> 
> You deserve this after yesterdays WTF moments.


	9. Last Supper

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Olivia and Alex feast on each other.

My life lets the towel drop to the floor, revealing every single line, curve and jut of her magnificence. Her gaze holds a challenge so earth-shatteringly fierce, I momentarily freeze, wondering whether I’ll  _ ever _ experience a more achingly beautiful sight in my life. 

The incessant quivering of my core unfreezes my enthralled limbs. I approach my life with carnal intent; my hands forcefully threading through her hair as my lips take ownership of her mouth, her lips, her tongue. 

My Omega melts into my touch, giving as fiercely as she receives, her arms pulling me to her intoxicating body; our shivering flesh in complete and utter contact as my hands move down her willowy frame until I’m squeezing her bottom, my fingers kneading her supple cheeks. 

My life moans into my neck. This one sound breaks my fragile resolve. I suddenly push Alex down onto the bed and climb on top of her; my hands, lips and tongue dining on her excruciating perfection; my Omega helplessly willing as I take her, with every fibre of strength I have left.

I lift her thigh eagerly, my knee pressing flush against her swollen arousal. Alex throws her head back, breaking our all-consuming kiss as she ruts against me; my mouth ravaging her neck as her exquisite form arches and bucks in earnest. 

My breath gives out as I raise my head to watch my life come. Her eyes drink in mine as the first whispers of ecstasy scorch through her.  _ Nope, this is the most beautiful sight I’ve ever seen, _ I think breathlessly as my Omega smiles at me, her features becoming ever more exquisite as her willowy frame racks with tremors of unadulterated pleasure. Her breaths quick and shallow as she looks into my soul. 

I stroke her flawless bone structure, as I lean in for another all-consuming kiss that tips the world off its axis. Her arms immediately surround me. Alex's utter desperation to be taken, to become one, absolute as she cups my face to prolong a kiss so clit-wrenchingly powerful, my body shatters, releasing wave after wave of blindingly intense pleasure. 

Alex tears her lips from mine, wanting to watch my orgasm unfold.  _ Nope, this is the most beautiful sight I’ve ever seen, _ she parrots back as a smile near tears my face apart.  

She runs her fingers through my short locks, as my mouth fuses with hers once more. Her fingertips explore my shoulders, my back, my sides. I jolt slightly when her nails graze my ribs. I gaze into her iridescent orbs, heat and mirth easily discernible in their depths as I feel her nails graze me again. 

I quickly pin her wrists, as much to stop her tickling me, as knowing my Omega  _ wants _ precisely this. With a look, Alex knows to keep her arms above her head as I straddle her hips, her eyes bursting with a need I am yet to fully understand. 

I lean on my elbows as my fingers begin stroking her sensitive flesh. My life immediately arches into my touch as I skitter my nails across her rib cage and sides. 

My Omega lowers her arms to her mouth, silencing her own screams as I continue to tickle her, knowing she’s teetering on the edge of oblivion. 

As I pleasure her, Alex lifts her thigh and begins rubbing herself against my aching clit. I give into the sensations rioting through me as I bite into her flesh, needing complete connection; a blood connection. I hear my Omega whimper in ecstasy as I completely dominate her writhing form, my nails skating up and down her sides in ever faster strokes until a cry escapes her lips. 

I instantly check in with my life, gazing into her euphoric eyes as her surging orgasm courses through her.

As her pleasure ebbs, Alex restarts her rutting against my swollen clit. Seconds later, I collapse on top of her, her fingers hurriedly replacing her thigh to lengthen and intensify my release still further. 

Her fingers don’t relent in their incessant stroking. My body innately bucks against her, experiencing endless waves of orgasmic pleasure so intense, my entire frame swells and contracts with each twitch of her expert fingers. 

_ Jesus!  _ my mind howls as my Omega dominates my senses, even while  _ I’m _ lying on top of her. I’m utterly helpless to her ministrations, as I gaze into her blazing eyes. 

I realise she’s challenging me; attempting to dominate me.  _ You’re practicing _ . 

It takes every atom of strength I possess to wrench her fingers from my apex. I inhale several shuddering breaths to equalise myself as I watch a sly grin form on her lips.

_ You’re in for it now, _ I promise as I take hold of her wrists and pin her down forcefully, using one hand. My Omega feigns struggling against my hold, engorging my already swollen clit. I squeeze her wrists, letting her know in no uncertain terms that she won’t be released until I  _ allow _ it. Still, she knows to struggle; her eyes nearly black, her pupils dilated with the intensity of her rioting arousal. 

She licks her lips, her sign to continue,  _ forever _ . I heed her. I lower my lips to her throat, licking at the beading blood before I bite her skin, leaving my mark on her tender flesh.  _ Mine! _

_ Yours! _

I flip Alex onto her front and fist her hair, forcing her to arch into me as I position myself on her lower back, my clit raking against her. My Omega’s hands are useless; their priority to maintain our balance as I ride her, furiously, in my quest for unimaginable climax.

Slowly, teasingly, I trace my fingers to her scorching wetness. 

As soon as my fingers begin stroking her, thoroughly, incessantly, my life almost collapses in euphoria. My fist remains in her hair, forcing her to balance us, as I continue to rub myself against her; my climax flooding my senses.

Finally, I release my brutal hold. Alex collapses onto the bed, her body writhing in ecstasy. I stalk to my sole bag of possessions and retrieve my prized item.

My life looks up and stares at me, her breaths strained and wanton.  _ I thought... _

_ Never _ , I respond interrupting her; my Omega thinking I’d forgotten it in our hast to leave. 

I attach it and begin stroking ‘myself’ in a rhythmic motion. 

My life flips over so she can observe this new spectacle.  _ God, Liv!  _ Alex whispers breathlessly, enthralled by my member, my hand, my stroking. My clit, already bursting with pre-release, contracts and swells mercilessly as my life takes me in her mouth. I orgasm immediately, my knees buckling under the sensations rioting through me. 

_ Jesus fucking...  _ I collapse on top of her, entering her wetness with ease. I thrust into my life with every vestige of dominance and energy I have left. 

My Omega’s lips lock with mine as her arms encircle my shoulders carefully, her legs wrapping around my waist, her submission achingly complete. I thrust into her until I see stars; my carnal need to dominate Alexandra Cabot, devastatingly rabid.

_ Christ! _ she screams as I abruptly change positions, withdrawing sharply before delving back into her depths from behind. I mount her as my member pistons in and out of her. I bite her neck, causing my life to yelp slightly. I finger her jaw to gain eye contact.  _ Okay? _

_ Hmmm... _ is all Alex can muster, her eyes unseeing as her entire frame begins to tremble through the first crescendos of soul-shattering climax.

For several minutes, I lie on my Omega; my member still inside her, our breathing strained and uneven, our sated exhaustion utterly consuming. 

Eventually, I withdraw myself from my life’s thoroughly ravaged flesh. I throw my appendage aside and immediately return to Alex, my arms folding around her; our bodies slick and spent. 

My Omega turns in my arms. I notice tears in her eyes as she cradles my jaw, her fingers stroking my skin. She gazes at me with an expression of pure concentration, as though she’s trying to memorize every line on my face. 

_ Lex... _

_ Shush!  _ she hushes me, as her simmering, cloudy blue orbs continue their intense perusal of my features.  _I want to remember this moment : how you look, how you smell, how you feel. _

A low whine escapes my lips, as my heart bursts with comprehension. 

Alex strokes my entire face, before running her fingers through my hair.  _ You are truly beautiful, Olivia Benson. And no matter what happens next, you will forever be my Alpha. I love you, my heroine. _

_ Oh God, Alex!  _ my mind cries as I mirror her touches, her strokes, her caresses.  _ You are breathtakingly magnificent, Alexandra Cabot. And no matter what happens next, you will forever be my life partner, my soul mate, my counterpoint. I love you, my everything. _

My life nuzzles, then kisses, me before gazing into my eyes with an expression so heart-breaking, yet so soul-stirring.  _ Its time. _


	10. Pre-Transition

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Olivia and Alex rejoin the pack.  
> Questions are asked and a shocking disclosure is made.

We finally become two; my life giving me one last chaste kiss before she vacates the bed, not wishing to lose her nerve. 

I gesture towards the bathroom, expecting Alex to wash before... 

 _No_ _need. Liz sa..._ she stops herself, suddenly wondering whether all Donnelly’s pearls of wisdom are lies, to keep her trapped as a Pure Blood Omega, open to abuse, forever. 

I swallow hard as I watch this uncertainty play across her features. _All we can do is try_ _,_ I state confidently, though my own nerves are frayed. 

Alex looks me square in the eye, her expression haunted. _I don’t think I can do it again if it doesn’t_ _work first time_ _,_ she confesses, her resolve weakening. 

I move to cradle her jaw. ‘Imagine if you give into all the insecurities Donnelly is praying you do,’ I whisper forcefully, using my voice to pull her out of her mind. ‘Don’t let her violate _everything_ you’ve worked so hard for,’ I stress as I gaze into her iridescent orbs. ‘Now, would you prefer to shower or stay reeking of me?’ I ask softly, trying to lighten the weight on her narrow shoulders.  

A smile curves her lips. ‘Reeking of you,’ my life answers immediately. 

‘Okay,’ I say, smiling too, as Alex turns to dress in the clothes she's been wearing all day.  

My expression must have surprised her because she impales me with her intense gaze. _This isn’t a date Liv._ _There’s no need for me to smell of vulnerability_ _._  

I can’t argue with her logic, especially as we both know her scent and touch will drive any pull-person crazy, no matter when she last washed herself.  

As soon as we’re both dressed, we walk, arm in arm, to find the rest of our pack.  

After several minutes of searching, and realising just how big Alex’s property is, we call for them. 

 

First George, then Fin and Kate appear; Fins hair looking mussed from sleep. It draws my attention to the state of my hair; our hair. I check my Omega’s with a sideward glance. _Definitely sex hair._  

Kate gawfs as Fin and George look at me in shock. Alex does her best not to look my way as titters of awkward laughter ripple through the pack. 

My life clears her throat, to ground everybody. _There’s a very real reason we_ _hurried_ _here._ _It’s th_ _e same_ _reason we took your phones so there could be no_ _external contact._  

 _Because Liv beat up Liz?_ Fin surmises astutely.  

 _Partly,_ I admit, knowing the bitch will bring charges against me. It’s only a matter of time. 

 _But?_ George waits for more. 

Alex glances at Kate as she voices her next sentence. _Liz is no longer a member_ _o_ _f this pack_. As expected, Kate’s face pales, whilst Fin and George appear more intrigued. _She was trying to overthrow Liv_ _, to_ _become_ _my Alpha, your Alpha._ The gasps that follow break my heart. _She was grooming me for months,_ _to such a successful extent that we_ _were having_ _‘_ _practice_ _’_ _sessions..._  

 _Sessions???_ my mind barks as I stare at my Omega. 

 _Sessions,_ Alex clarifies as she squeezes my arm. _I’m sor..._  

 _You have no_ _need_ _to apologise_ _, sweetie._ _None!_ I stress as I squeeze her hand in return. 

We turn back to the gawking pack. _Liz called these sessions ‘Practice'. Practice in how to dominate you,’_ Alex confesses, her eyes on Kate. _That’s what Liv walked in on_ _,_ _and_ _caused the resulting fight_. My Omega looks at each member in turn. _Due to Liz being the_ _domina_ _n_ _t Alpha, hierarchically, she could mask her thoughts, her feelings, her true intentions._ _When Liv visited her in hospital, Liz admitted to wanting me for herself,_ Alex licks her lips to steady her nerves as Kate steps forward.  

 _I’m so sorry Alex_ , the doctor conveys sincerely. 

 _You believe us?_ my life asks, slightly astounded Kate, of all the pack members, would be so empathetic, _so_ quickly.  

Kate nods her head. _She had a practice session with me once._ _It... it went_ _..._ she clears her throat self-consciously. _I_ _t went further than it should have._  

My muscles shudder at her words as Alex searches her watery orbs. _Christ_ _, Kate._ _I’m..._ _I’m so_ _sorry._  

 _You have nothing to_ _apologise_ _for Alex._  

 _How did you keep this from us?_ I ask, wondering. 

 _Whenever I was in your company,_ she gestures to me, _Alex was present_ _._ _You..._  she glances towards my Omega.  _You_ _distracted me_ _..._ Kate answers honestly as my life looks at her shoes, wishing she wasn’t the object of desire for so many. _Sorry,_ Kate says quickly, blushing crimson. I squeeze her arm briefly as Alex nods in understanding.  

 _Did you know?_ I ask Fin and Huang.  

 _They didn’t know_ , Kate speaks again. _Because Li_ _z_ _was always with me. I couldn’t get away from her_ _. The only times_ _I could, she ordered that I go and stay in my room, alone, until she came and got me_ _._ A sob catches in my Omega’s throat. _That must_ _have_ _been_ _when she was_ _‘_ _practicing_ _’_ _with you._  

 _Oh God, Kate,_ Alex gasps, struggling for breath. _I... we thought you and Liz were_ _close like mother and daughter..._  

 _No._  

This one word breaks me. I approach her. _Can I touch you?_ I ask, wishing to respect Kate's boundaries as I try to keep my raging anger under control. She nods in acquiescence. I envelope her into my arms, her head in the crock of my neck, as the rest of the pack, bar Alex, embrace us. _I’m so sorry Kate. As your Alpha, I should have known_ _._ I gaze at my life, her body shaking as her rage and spirit renews. 

 _You weren’t my Alpha, she was_ _,_ Kate voices as tears race down her face. _That’s_ _how_ _she could_ _dominate me_ _so easily_ _._  

My insides seize with raging disgust at the destruction Donnelly’s left behind. I withdraw my touch before I crush Kate, my every fibre taut and seething.  

My life takes my hand to steady us. I link my fingers through hers as she kisses me softly, to enforce her grounding, before she turns back to Kate. 

 _As a Pure Blood Omega, as a_ _trauma'd_ _woman, I understand you more than anyone. I’ll completely understand if you_ _don’t_ _ever want to be touched again._ _But I_ _have_ _to ask, would you still_ _like_ _to be part of my transition?_  

 _Yes!_ Kate replies at once, her certainty absolute, as she wipes her face. George retrieves a tissue from his pocket. 

 _Typical psychiatrist_ _._ _Always_ _on_ _the job..._ I tease to relieve some of the tension.  

Alex ignores me, her eyes seeing only Kate in this moment. _If I were to ask you to_ _help_ _me_ _with my transition, now, would you feel up to it?_  

Kate lands her weighted gaze on the most intoxicating creature in the room, in New York City, in the world. _I have spoken quite plainly of my wish to help in anyway I can. If this can help us take that bitch down, I’m_ _in._ Kate doesn’t repeat her other reasons; having already voiced more than she ever needed to.  

 _Okay_ _._  

Kate whistles through her teeth; the enormity of the last few minutes and the time yet to come, hitting her like a freight train. Her pupils are already innately dilated in anticipation. I feel the excitement oozing off of her.  

I feel Alex eyeing me as she senses Kate's pheromones. ‘Omi,’ she utters urgently. ‘Go take Liv to that bedroom.’ My life points to a different room to the one we made love in. Fin nods before starting to herd me. 

I side-step his splayed arms with ease, to taste my Omega one final time. Once the kiss ends, I nuzzle her for several heart beats. _I love you, my_ _magnificent Omega_ _._  

 _I love you more, my_ _heroine_ _Alpha._  

I step away before I lose all semblance of control urging me to run back to my life, kicking and screaming, and never letting go. I don’t turn back, knowing if I do, this transition attempt is over. _We don’t have time Olivia!_ I self-scold to keep my limbs moving.  

My body stiffens with every step; feeling my Omega's stunningly intoxicating aura, her beautiful scent, slowly but surely ebb until I can no longer sense her.  

I hear Fin lock the door, seconds before I collapse to the floor; my mind, body and soul dying, imagining my Omega, my life partner, sleeping with another woman. 


	11. Transition

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex`s POV

I attempt to control my racing heart as George leads us to a room three flights up. It wasn’t the absolute furthest room from Liv's location for a reason. _That would be the first place she'd look,_ Alex remembers telling Kate when the doctor suggested the spare room, it being the furthest from ours (at the cabin). 

They have heeded my advice, choosing a room near directly three flights above where Liv and Omi are now.  

I eye the bed, already laid out with silk ties positioned at all four posts. I swallow hard, trying to stop my anxiety getting the better of me. _Just remember_ _Li_ _z. What she did._ My lungs seize as Kate sits on the bed, her nervousness outweighed by her surging arousal.  

‘Can you leave us for a minute, George?’ I request, knowing the importance of reassuring her, myself. 

Huang nods and leaves the room immediately. 

‘Kate?’ I say uselessly, knowing I already have her complete attention.  

The shy doctor lifts her head further, re-acknowledging my presence. 

‘I’m sorry this is having to be rushed. I know this is going to be hard for both of us, but I really would like this to be as quick, easy and painless an experience as it can possible be,’ I whisper as I step towards the bed and sit beside her. I watch Kate’s entire body tremble. ‘The last thing I want to do is leave you feeling violated or forced in any way...’ 

Kate laughs, despite herself. ‘I’m sorry, Alex, but you couldn’t do anything to me that I wouldn’t want,’ she states with exposing honesty. Her cheeks flush pink as she lowers her eyes, biting her lip, pleading with herself to shut up. 

‘Don’t shut up Kate. I need to hear you right now. Okay?’ 

Kate nods self-consciously.  

‘Okay. Is there anything that might trigger you that I should be aware of?’ I ask calmly, my heart racing and my lungs screaming as I try to make this as normal a conversation as possible. 

Kate raises her eyes to meet mine, her emerald greens remembering horror from her past. ‘Maybe don’t enter me from behind...’ she stutters out as she tries to catch her breath, her entire body racked with adrenaline.  

‘Behind, as in your vagina or your anus? Or both?’ I ask the disgustingly intrusive question, needing to know clear boundaries. 

‘Anus,’ Kate coughs out as I fight the urge to comfort her, touch her, at this moment. 

‘Anything else?’ I query, wanting to be sure. 

‘l don’t like big... toys,’ Kate admits, her face and neck beetroot. 

‘I won’t be entering you with any toys,’ I reassure her as she looks at me quizzically. 

‘Surely to dominate me completely, you...’ 

‘Domination isn’t necessarily about penetration. It’s about a state of mind; a physicality _and_ emotionality in possessing the other person,’ I explain, hoping I’m parroting similar words to those George voiced during a private conversation.  

‘You can p... penetrate me with something if you want?’ Kate offers as I try not to smile at the sheer awkwardness of our situation. 

I’m sitting with a woman, a beautiful, similar-aged woman, who worships me. There's no other word for it. She looks at me like I’m the most enthralling creature on the planet, hanging on my every word as she sits patiently waiting to have sex with me. It makes me sick that I feel I’m using her. 

 _Please don’t, Alex,_ I suddenly remember Kate can hear me. _I’m completely_ _consenting_ _. You know this_ _._  

I inhale a steadying breath, trying to halt comparing this to blackmail or emotional rape. 

 _Stop, Alex!_ Kate stares deeply into my eyes. _I am a fully consenting adult_.  

I swallow thickly, lowering my eyes a moment, trying to remember what else George taught me. _Remember our safe word?_  

_Agemo._

_Good._  

 _I’m ready Alex,_ Kate's breathing falters as she realises how brazen she sounded. 

I laugh despite myself. _It’s okay, Kate_ _,_ I say, my eyes soft and reassuring. _Should I get George?_  

 _Uhuh_ _,_ Kate answers unintelligibly, not trusting herself to speak further.  

 

George returns and proceeds to help me tie Kate to the bed. I tie her wrists as George ties her ankles.  

Kate pulls on them to test their worth before she finally settles back on the bed with a nod, her face already flushed from exertion.  

I glance at George who leaves the room. 

I gaze at Kate; fully clothed and tied down helplessly to the bed. _She’s completely and willingly at my mercy_ , I think to myself, knowing Kate can hear me.  

A whine escapes her lips as I ponder her form; suddenly aware I am already teasing her. _Jesus!_  

I step towards her, trying to be seductive for some reason as Kate looks into my soul. _Be you, Alex... I’d still... find you devastatingly_ ... _beautiful, even if... you had a... penis_. 

I can’t help but laugh again, kicking myself for trying to be something I’m not as I attempt to shake my awkwardness, my nerves, as I begin unbuttoning her shirt.  

Kate’s chest heaves wildly as I reveal her stunning form. _Her breast are smaller than... stop!_   

Kate looks at me, surprising me when a smile spreads across her lips. _My breasts_ _..._ _are smaller than_ _..._ _Liv's._  

 _You've_ _been looking?_  

 _Who_ _..._ _couldn’t?_  

 _Touche!_ I allow, trying not to overthink as I strip Kate.  

There is no need to tear her clothing from her body, the necessary areas being more than accessible.  

I start to unzip her jeans, watching her abdomen muscles tense as I pull them down her legs, her panties still in place.  

About half way down, I notice a problem. Kate’s jeans can’t go any lower because her legs are spread. _This will_ _make sex uncomfortable for both of_ _us._ _Shit!_  

 _Untie my legs?_ Kate suggests as I measure her intent. _Why_ _..._ _would I try for_ _..._ _something that’s already a_ _..._ _dead cert?_ _And_ _..._ _my wrists will_ _..._ _remain tied._  

 _You have a point,_ I concede as I untie her ankles so I can remove the offending jeans from her body.  

As soon as I prize them off, Kate submissively places her sinewed legs back down on the bed. 

 _Spread them_ , I find myself demanding, having noticed the dampness in the crotch of her panties. I lick my lips as I realise her immobility and dampness are turning me on. 

She catches me staring, her eyes fully dilated as she reads my features, as any Omega worth their salt would. _Holy shit_ _!_ her mind howls with comprehension. _You’re..._  

 _Enough!_ I hush her , embarrassed that I’ve been caught but also paranoid if Liv... _Stop! Not here!_ I chastise myself as Kate watches me, keeping her mind and mouth submissively quiet.  

I stalk round the bed, perusing the half-naked woman in front of me. Her skin is already slick with sweat, her aura surging with arousal, her body aching for my dominance. It shocks me that I’m enjoying this dominance. I take a breath to steady myself.  

 _Splay your knees and put your soles together,_ I command, my abdomen twitching as Kate obeys me. Her dampness is now thrust forward and even more achingly evident. 

I clear my throat, wondering what to do next. _Undress_ , I think to myself. _Fuck!_ _This really_ _is_ _happening..._ my mind hammers into my conscious as I hear Kate whimper. 

‘Did I say you could make a sound?’ I snarl aggressively, causing Kate to bite her lip, sheepishly. ‘No?’ I know I’m goading her so she can push me to our next point.  

‘No,’ Kate answers to help my fire truly ignite.  

I advance on her, grabbing her jaw fiercely. ‘I told you _not_ to talk. Now what would be a worthy punishment?’ Kate’s body shudders at my contact, my words, my intentions. _J_ _esus!_ I’m completely unable to silence my mind. 

One hand keeps her jaw steady as the other traces under her bra and begins fondling her left breast. Kate’s frame immediately spasms as I unclasp the front of her bra for easier access _._  

Her entire body bucks against my efforts as I feel and sense the ripples of pleasure course through her.  

I withdraw my touch and move down the bed to openly stare at the dampness between her legs. Her arousal has spilled over onto the sheets. My heart races, knowing I’m the cause of it.   

I stand at the foot of the bed, Kate’s soles still touching as instructed, as I begin unbuttoning my shirt. I watch renewed arousal soil her panties as I throw my silk shirt to the floor. I then unbutton my pants, letting them drop in a heap. I step out of them, standing before a helpless Kate in only my panties; my breasts so pert, they don’t require support.  

I watch Kate’s chest heave in a quickening motion as I stare her down, knowing the absolute impact I’m having on her senses. I’m honest and aware enough to realise I’m enjoying it, _this_. 

I slowly crawl onto the bed, placing a hand painfully close to her arousal as I climb her body, my tongue grazing against her stomach, her abdomen clenching against the sensations flooding her. _Talk to me..._ I coax as my tongue delves into her navel. 

 _Oh my_ _..._ _God!! Oh my God!! My idol... Alex_ _..._ _fucking..._ _Cabot._ _.._ _is fucking me!!! Jesus_ _..._ _fucking..._  

 _Enough!_ I silence Kate’s rioting thoughts, as I straddle her waist, my hands splayed over her abdomen.  

The look in her eyes tells me she is on the brink, skin contact alone enough to take her spiralling over the edge. I trace my fingers up to her breasts, kneading them as I start to rut against her prominent hip bone; the perfect shape to stroke my embarrassingly swollen clit.  

Kate’s eyes roll back into her head as my fingers pinch her nipples. She tries to watch me riding her but the sight, my touch, my scent is too overpowering for her senses. She comes again before my body allows me to relax enough to join her.  

When my climax hits, I note Kate's only the second person to give me wilful orgasm without forcibly taking it from me. A tear travels down my face as I stop rubbing myself against her hip.  

Before I bottle it, I wrench Kate’s knee up slightly and sit myself across her thigh, my body fully bent over hers, my arms either side of her head, my elbows my support as I begin rubbing myself against her thigh.  

Kate stares into my eyes as her hands actively try to escape their bounds to take me, to ravish me. 

 _You can’t escape what I’m doing to you,_ I goad playfully, knowing Kate is loving every second as my body tries to will itself to another orgasm. 

 _Nor... do... I... want... to..._ Kate acknowledges breathlessly as I stop, my entire body millimetres from hers.  

 _You didn’t just disobey me, did you?_ I state, feigning shock as I feel the fight raging in Kate to speak again ;  to kiss me, our lips so close. _If you kiss me, this is over,_ I warn seriously. Kate bites her lip as her green orbs burst with a thousand emotions. _One more word, sound or utterance and I’ll stop,_ I set the bar a final time; tracing a hand between our bodies to push Kate’s thigh down.  

I tease my lingering fingers inside her panties but stop before I touch her burgeoning clit. Kate's body instantly bucks against mine, utterly unable to hide or control her hunger for my touch.  

 _Enough_ _!_ I order, making the quivering wreck of a woman beneath me freeze. I watch her eyes travel from the tip of my head, to my parted lips, inches from hers. Her breathing stutters as she battles against every primal urge to kiss me, to dominate me. Her chest undulates dramatically as she fights for self-control.  

Only when a calmness descends over Kate, through emotional disassociation most Omega’s possess to survive, do I lower my fingers.  

 _Any sounds or_ _aggressive_ _movements and I’ll stop._ _And I_ _mean stop, wholly_ _,_ I warn as my fingertips finally touch her aching clit. Kate’s body immediately trembles as I stroke two fingers, furiously, against her swollen centre.   

My fingers continue their onslaught as Kate’s emerald  orbs plead with me to allow her to cry out, to scream in ecstasy as the most powerful orgasms of her life, pummel her senses and drive her wantonly crazy.  

Instead, she suffers my vicious assault in torturous silence; her breathing her only audible tell. I continue my abuse, scribbling my expert fingers either side of her quivering nub as I watch her expression flitter between earth-shattering pleasure and all-consuming despair, as she experiences the wonders of heaven and the demons of hell in equal measure.  

I stop my thorough ministrations moments before Kate passes out. _Scream_ _and_ _breathe for me,_ I finally relent. 

Kate howls so aggressively, I feel the bed shake as the muted moans, gasps and whines burst from her lips; multiple sound waves of deafening ecstasy permeating the walls. 

Her lungs batter her rib cage as she tries to inhale the oxygen necessary to survive the darkness.  

 _Breathe, Kate. Breathe! With me..._ I gaze into her e yes as I inhale through my nose for four beats, then exhale through my mouth for eight. I repeat this cycle but Kate still can’t catch her breath. _Shit!_ _Kate, just_ _..._  

 _A... gem... o_ _..._ she stutters, desperately. I immediately withdraw my touch; standing and watching helplessly as the doctors breaths finally equalise.  

I inhale several steadying breaths, relieved beyond measure, as Kate finally turns to me with glazed eyes. _God_ _..._ _Alex_ _,_ she breathes, utterly exhausted.  

I move to the head of the bed and untie her wrists. They land limply on the sheets as I watch the shock materialise in Kate’s questioning orbs.  

 _I was told to fully dominate you, I’d need to tire you out then take you without_ _your_ _bounds_ _,_ I express nervously as I watch Kate’s mind work overtime. _How would you feel about_ _me_ _doing that?_  

 _Fucking_ _..._ _great!_ Kate responds immediately, her chest still heaving with overwhelming exhaustion and clit-bursting pleasure.  

 _Can I trust you?_ I ask, keeping my speaking voice purposely mute, knowing a further arousal trigger could bring irreversible consequences.  

 _Tell me_ _..._ _what to do_ _..._ _when and I’ll_ _..._ _do it,_ Kate promises, her eyes still glazed as I approach her, cautious to the dangers the next few minutes may bring.  

 _Stay still unless I_ _say otherwise,_ _but feel free to put those lungs of yours to good use_ _,_ I allow, knowing Kate will need at least one outlet if I’m to remain safe. 

 _Okay,_ Kate acquiesces immediately as I climb back on top of her, but this time, I pin her wrists using my weaker hands. ‘Jesus... _fucking..._ Christ!’ Kate barks as I lie on top of her, our flesh in complete contact. ‘Oh my G... od...’ she whimpers as I release one of her wrists and re-pin them with one hand; my other hand retrieving an item from the bedside cabinet.  

 _Stay_ _,_ I command dominantly, as Kate innately shifts under my slighter frame, aching for friction and release. Once she stills, I dangle my fingering dildo above her head teasingly. Kate spots and focuses on it, her eyes wide and dilated. _I want_ _to stress that_ _this is new._ _Is this okay?_  

 _Ye...s!_ she says haltingly, her entire form trembling with carnal anticipation.  

I skate the device down her taut abdomen, her muscles stiffening still further, as I lower it to her clothed apex.  

Silence reigns for interminable seconds as I ensure I have absolute power over Kate. _Stay_ _._   

The sudden buzzing interrupts this moment of peace. I begin stroking her dampness as my lips latch onto her flesh. _‘_ _Holy_ _..._ _shit!!’_ Kate bellows as I try not to recoil at her taste.  

I bite her, hard, before I lose my nerve. _Fuck!_ I keen, tasting an Omega’s blood, for the first time.  

Something shifts in me.  

I drop the device momentarily, leaning into her pinned wrists as I tear at her panties, ridding her of her final barrier.  

 _Oh... Alex..._ Kate bleats as I grasp the toy once more and rub it incessantly against her bear, vulnerable and utterly consenting clitoris.  

I maintain my hold as Kate squirms beneath me, her body writhing in open ecstasy. She gasps and moans as I enter her, plunging the vibrating device into her depths with such ferocity, Kate truly fights my hold for the first time. 

 _Don’t!_ I warn, gripping her wrists firmly as I observe, feel and sense her body implode for the umpteenth time.  

 _Tire her out,_ I mantra, withdrawing the dildo and entering her with my fingers, immediately pressing against her front wall as I continue holding her down. 

 _Jesus!_ Kate wails as my fingers tease her, leaving her a quivering mess of exposed nerve-endings. 

I don`t stop, wanting to be truly certain I’ve done all that I can, all that was suggested of me, _so I won’t have to do this again._   

As soon as I think this, Kate’s eyes fly open, knowing the experience of her life is coming to an end.  

I was warned this would be the most dangerous aspect of transition, for both of us. _My_ risk is the moment I feel I have done all I can, Kate may disagree. She has now experienced a euphoria she may never wish to relinquish. 

On the flip side, I may have already successfully transitioned, or it might take several hours. If I _have_ transitioned, Kate’s Omega scent could be arousing to me. This is _her_ risk. 

We stare at each other, my fingers slowly withdrawing from her quaking flesh as we play this risky game of cat and mouse.  

My breathing shallows as I note the expression in Kate’s eyes. ‘I’m... utterly... spent...’ she assures me, her breathing strained, her chest heaving from all-consuming, physical and mental exertion. 

Her eyes follow my retreating nakedness as I quickly cloth my body; our potential threat to each other, dissipating rapidly. ‘You realise... you have blown... my expectations... of sex... out of the water? _Christ_... _Alex!_ _’_  

For some reason, I watch as Kate gets dressed. She eyes me curiously. _You okay?_  

 _It’s just_ _... I_ _’ve_ _never experienced wilful orgasm with anyone_ _besides_ _Liv. I truly thank you for that, for this,_ _for_ _everything._  

 _Alex,_ Kate whispers though she maintains her distance, her need to be wary of a potentially newly transitioned Alpha, innate. _I’ve never experienced wilful orgasm_ _..._ _before_ _today._  

My heart shatters as I clench my jaw to stop myself embracing her. A tear threatens to fall, as I honour this incredible woman standing in front me. _Now you know what_ _it_ _can be like. You deserve it_ _, Kate. You will find_ _a loving partner_ _..._  

 _‘Alex,_ ’ she interrupts my thoughts. _‘Please_... relieve yourself of your guilt. You’ve given me... a gift; the knowledge that I _do_ … deserve respect and softness.’ A lone tear trails down her face. ‘Now, go… to your Alpha before you, or she, break the door down.’  

I smile, realising my back is flush against the bedroom door, my body silently pleading for my Alpha. _Kate,_ I meet her piercing gaze. _Th_ _ank you_ _, so much_.  


	12. Wait For It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The pack reassemble.  
> Alex and Olivia try to behave.

I know my Alpha is within inches of me; my every fibre picking up her deliciously dominant scent, with my back to the solid door. I twist the nob and quickly dart through it; to give Kate some privacy; into my lovers waiting arms.

 _My life, you hurt?_ Olivia asks immediately, scanning my body intently before her strong embrace engulfs me once more. She nuzzles my cheek, my hair, my neck to reaffirm her scent on my body.

 _God! You smell so good!_ I exclaim silently, allowing her heady eau-de-Liv scent wash over me in powerful waves of ever increasing dominance.

 _What do you need, Alex?_ my Alpha asks, as my heart aches at the love and comfort her touch, her mind, her essence is bestowing on me, considering my most recent venture.

 _You don’t hate me?_ I lean back and ask the question before I can stop myself. I bite my lip as Olivia’s eyes soften.

 _How could I?_ she replies immediately, wiping a stray tear from my cheekbone.

 _I love you, Liv,_ my head screams into her soul, as I refold myself into her body.

‘I love you, Lex,’ Olivia whispers back, my shaky confidence obliterated by my Alpha’s undeniable hunger, love and adoration.

 _Do I smell different?_ I ask suddenly, lifting my face from the crook of her neck.

 _You smell like you.... and Kate,_ Olivia answers honestly, instant relief then self-consciousness causing me to finally tear myself away.

 _How did you get out of the bedroom?_ I belated enquire, looking around me for Omi and George. Olivia’s expression says it all. _Where are they, Liv?_

_Huang just might be out cold downstairs..._

_‘Liv!?’_ I bark, pushing past her to run down one flight of stairs before I stumble upon George, rubbing his head and chest. ‘George? Can you...?’

‘Sorry George,’ Olivia states apologetically as she licks a scratch on her hand.

 _Did you...?_ the psychiatrist enquires anxiously.

 _I stayed outside. I was a good girl_. I make a mental note to question this later.

‘I’m fine Alex, really,' he says, trying to evade my fussing. 'And Liv, I _got_ you,’ he boasts, his tone pained but proud as he spies our Alpha’s injury.

He tries to stand but is pushed back down by another pair of hands: Kate’s. ‘Don’t go standing up just yet, G. Wait for the light-headedness to pass,’ she suggests as Liv and I squat beside her, watching her check his vitals. ‘He's fine,’ she reassures everyone. ‘Where’s Fin?’

The awkward smile crossing my Alpha's features makes me shiver with apprehension. ‘Liv?’ I question, my tone cautious.

‘He’s handcuffed to the bed,’ she confesses as I race down to make sure that’s all that’s happened to him.

As soon as I step through the remnants of the wrecked door and see his anxiety ridden face staring at me, pleading for forgiveness, my heart melts.

‘I balls it, didn’t I?’

‘Olivia Magdalena Benson, get down here _right_ now and _release_ Omi!’ I shout up the stairs as I approach him. ‘No Omi. Everything went as hoped... I think,’ I reply soothingly, a grin forming on his lips.

‘I didn’t cock it up, Meg?’ his eyes still disbelieving as I pull him to me.

‘No, my darling. Donnelly said it would either be instant or the morning after. If we’re still believing her, I should wake up to a whole new dawn...’ I whisper into his shoulder as I sense my love beside me. I hear the chink of metal and the release of the cuffs.

After embracing Liv to convey his understanding, Omi turns to me, absentmindedly rubbing his wrists. ‘How d’you know you aren’t already...?’

‘Good question,’ Liv husks as she kisses me dominantly, utterly failing to maintain any form of decorum in front of our Omega. _Our Omega?_ The thought isn’t lost on me.

‘I’ll... I’ll...’ he starts toward the obliterated door as my Alpha takes my mouth so ferociously, I have to clutch onto her to remain standing.

_Jesus, your taste, Al..._

‘Stop,’ I murmur against her delicious lips, knowing to make love now could derail the entire transition. My Alpha heeds my request. Instead, she looks into my eyes with such searing heat, devotion and pride, I audibly whimper. ‘Don't look at me like that again until morning,’ I stress as Liv takes a step back, our fingers our one unbroken connection.

‘How do we know you haven’t already?’ she asks, licking her lips subconsciously.

‘I don’t want to jinx it. Sleep, like we discussed,’ I state evenly, needing Olivia to control herself tonight. 

‘You’re the Pure Blood Alpha,’ she acknowledges prematurely, saluting me. My abdomen clenches at the thought of taking my Alpha. My heart flutters desperately just as the exhaustion of the last few days, weeks, years, begins to cave in on me. My vision turns blurry as the room starts spinning.

_Liv!_

I wake to concerned green orbs staring intently into mine. ‘Liv, she’s conscious,’ I watch Kate say as my love enters my line of vision.

‘Lex?’ I notice her tear stained face. ‘I’m here. Kate examined you. You’re fine. Just a little exhausted after _everything_ ,’ my Alpha explains as she grasps my hand. ‘Bed rest until at _least_ tomorrow morning. Doctors orders,’ she finishes as I squeeze her hand to convey my understanding and acquiescence.

Olivia kisses my hand, my forehead, my closing eyes; her intoxicating touch, her scent, her aura consuming my every pore. _Hers_ , the _only_ flesh I _ever_ want to touch or to touch me, ever again. _I love you, my everything_.

 _Love... you, my her... oine_.

I can only observe as Olivia moves to stand by Kate. ‘I don’t know if I can put into words what you have done for Alex, for us, for the pack...’

‘We don’t know whether the transitions been successful yet, Liv,’ Kate states practically as my Alpha turns to face her.

‘Kate, your selfless bravery means _everything_ , successful transition or not. Thank you. _Thank you_ so much,’ Olivia finally voices the words Kate so desperately needs to hear.

Awe for these women, _my_ women, infuses every fibre of my being. My last image: Olivia embracing a soul-shatteringly relieved Kate.

_Thank you..._

 

Insert Chapter One: Success?


	13. Reality

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex and Olivia try.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please read Chapter 1 before this one.

* * *

Eventually, my tears subside and a new urgency takes hold. I graze my nose against Olivia’s skin, breathing in her intoxicating scent as I feel her mirror my actions. I inhale several deep breaths, as much to imprint her scent on my soul as to gain control of my battered emotions.

I feel her tremble against me, a sigh escaping her lips as renewed tears land on my shoulder; my Alpha’s arms tightening around my body possessively. _Mine! Only mine.... Forever._ My love no longer has to share me, fight for me, die for me.

I nuzzle into her; my woman, my Alpha, my heroine, my life partner.  _Christ, Liv!_ She holds me as I break down once more; the torrent of relief and years lost, bursting from the life-long dam of self-preservation.

 

Finally, my watery eyes run dry. My ragged breaths cause my chest to shudder, as I try desperately to regain control of myself.

My Alpha lessons her hold to cradle my face above hers. _I still love you. I will always love your scent, your aura, your everything, Alexandra Cabot. If anything, I love you more. You are the most incredible being I’ve ever met. I’m overawed and privileged to call you my Pure Blood Alpha,_ Olivia whispers lovingly as I try to swallow ready tears.

I bite my lip and lean further into my elbows, so I can stroke her forearms as her hands support my jaw.  _You forgive me?_ I can’t stop myself asking, fathoming how hard it would have been for my Alpha to allow another to touch me, to take me.

 _Oh, sweetie, do you have any idea how brave, determined and inspirational you are?_ Olivia asks, waiting for my answer. Renewed moisture stings my cloudy blues. I shake my head, finding it impossible to speak, to think beyond my Alpha. _You are so beautiful_ , she husks, her bronze orbs gazing at me in open worship. She brushes away the remnants of my tears, with her thumbs, as I nuzzle into her touch.

I hear my life partner audibly whimper as I lower my lips to meet hers. Her mouth tastes all the more potent, all the more soul-shatteringly tantalising to my senses. I nibble her succulent lips, reacquainting myself with her taste; her new, improved, clit-quiveringly intense taste. _God, Liv, you taste so good!_

 _Mmmm_ , is all my Alpha can manage, her lack of coherence enough.

I tug her supporting hands from my jaw so I can finally release her mouth. We take audible breaths; our lungs seizing with want.  _Do you trust me?_ I ask my soulmate _._

 _With every fibre of my being,_ Olivia responds immediately.

‘Do you _want_ me?’ I goad further, my voice husky and dripping with carnal need.

‘Oh _Christ_ yes!’ my Alpha near screams.

‘I’m a Pure Blood Alpha, not Christ Liv. Don’t inflate my...’ I joke, letting Olivia’s impatience grow, her hands fisting either side of her head, as she waits for my initiation.

 _Lex! s_ he whines in frustration. I smile at her petulance. This infuriates her further. _Don’t push me..._ she warns as a laugh rips through my frame. My Alpha attempts to dismount me from her person, for the first time.

_Are you threatening me?_

_Don’t toy with me Cabot!_ Olivia cautions as she bucks her naked hips against mine, knowing exactly what she’s doing. I lean back slightly and press my pelvis into her, circling my hips seductively before grinding against her, causing a low whimper to burst from her lips. _Jesus..! Please..._

My abdomen clenches in response to the most overwhelming aphrodisiac: the sound of my Alpha _begging_ me to take her, to touch her, to own her.

 _How does it feel...?_ _Being completely under my con..._ Olivia’s growl interrupts my teasing. _This is really pissing you off, isn’t it?_

The look in her sparkling bronze orbs, the raging fire of unparalleled arousal building from within, makes my core tremble. I become lost in them as I feel my body spasm with the ever more urgent motion of my hips.

In truth, I know Olivia is _allowing_ me to do this. Following her fight with Liz, to protect me, I know she could challenge me if she truly wanted to. I make sure not to pin her... yet. Wishing for my newly demoted Alpha to have some control.

But as I feel the heated quivers surge from my clit, I grab hold of her muscular shoulders, to intensify the pleasure tingling through my synapses. My breaths short and fast, as my eyes feast on the stunningly naked form of my Olivia, my Alpha, watching me come.

I shut my eyes, the climax too powerful for my other senses to be useful, in these euphoric, blissful moments of all-consuming orgasm.

I open them to find my love gazing at me with such aching need, I feel drawn to her mouth once more; my body not afforded the opportunity to cool down, as the fire blazes on.

I lay myself over her nakedness, our flesh connecting inch by scorching inch, until a raging inferno bubbles just under the surface, waiting to be unleashed from our very souls. _Liv!_

 _I can’t... hold out... much longer..._ Olivia confesses, her mental chatter faltering in her carnal haze. Her thoughts cause my entire body to tremble as I kiss her mouth ravenously. She takes my flaxen hair in her hands, wanting to prolong the kiss.

I know she is nervous to fight me. My Alpha wants me to be in control. Though, her birth right to said control causes her unparrelled anguish, even as her body hums with soul-shattering need.

 _Okay?_ I ask, knowing we are testing new and dangerous territory.

 _Uhuh,_ Olivia replies, unable to construct viable sentences; her mind utterly consumed by animal desire.

I pull my lips away, needing to catch my breath. _I want to test my strength against you_. My love raises an affirmative brow. I extricate myself with relative ease. _You’re not fighting me,_ I challenge Olivia.

 _Is that an... invitation?_ she counters, waiting for my signal.

I lick my lips.

She grabs me, succeeding in switching our positions until she has me pinned against the bed, her hands clutching my willowy biceps as we stare each other down. _You... asked..._ my love breathes huskily as she proceeds to bite my neck. _Mine!_ That does it. I fold myself around her as tightly as I can, never wanting to let go of _the_ one.

I kiss and nibble her ear, her jaw, her neck until I suddenly latch onto her, sinking my teeth into her delicious flesh, never having tasted anything so exquisite in my life. _Jes... Liv!_ I hear Olivia howl against me, not expecting the abrupt burst of pain.

As soon as I taste her glorious life blood, I can no longer control my desperate need to have her. _Now!_ I grasp, clutch and flail for every last inch of her achingly beautiful flesh. My mind is utterly possessed as my hands, mouth, tongue and teeth, stroke, claw and gnash every apex, muscle and limb; blinded to everything but my need...

 _Lex!_ Her heart-wrenching cry freezes my frenzied muscles. I stop immediately, terrified of what I’ll find in Olivia’s eyes as I realise I have _completely_ overpowered her.

I finally meet my Alpha's bronze eyes, the rest of my body still frozen. As soon as I see tears in her magnificent orbs, sensibility courses through me. I’ve pinned Olivia on her front, her neck forced into an unnatural angle, her left arm in a lock I learned aged 10, in Karate class. My other hand is cupping her right breast. _No!_

My Alpha is completely under my control. This is only the second time in her entire life, someone has taken utter control of her; the first being Hell. Me, the woman she loves, is currently hurting her. Being so freshly transitioned, I have no idea of my own urges, power or strength in these blind moments of crushing need. _Oh God!_ I release her; mortified at the welts, scratches and burns I’ve etched onto her suddenly fragile body.

 _‘Christ_ Liv! I’m so... sorry....’ I stammer, my overwhelming urge to dominate so searingly powerful, I momentarily forgot myself, lost myself. _Shit!_ Guilt crushes every nerve in my body. 

I watch my Alpha shake her wrenched limb until the blood returns; her features wincing slightly as I notice blood on her collar.

‘Liv, you’re... you're bleeding...’ I stutter, renewed guilt hitting me with the force of a freight train. _Oh God!_ My vision blurs as I register the disturbing sight of _my_ Olivia in pain... _because of me. I’m so sorry, my love._

‘Lex,’ she says, her eyes steady, though her body still trembles slightly in shock. ‘One: you stopped,’ Olivia points out. ‘You have only just transitioned, but you’re strong enough to stop,’ she continues breathlessly, grasping my hand to reassure me. ‘You have a conscience,’ she stresses as I try not to be distracted by the feel of her skin touching mine. _Concentrate!_ ‘Second,’ Olivia fingers the back of her collar. ‘I think one of my stab wounds cracked. You didn’t cause this. You hear me...’ I can’t help noticing the tremor in her voice, in her hands.

‘I bit you...’ I whisper shakily, loathing myself in this moment.

‘Yes. It _fucking_ hurt. But it’s not any more than I’ve done to you. I never knew it was _so_ painful. I’m sorry...’ my Alpha whispers, truly realising for the first time how painful my assault at the hands of the Ashton’s and Daniels was; their bite marks covering every inch of my skin, save my face. I shudder involuntarily, hating that I’m thinking of them, of myself in such terms during our first time together, post-transition. My fingertips graze her cheekbone to ground us.  _You stopped my love,_ Olivia repeats herself, needing to reassure me. She knows I’m coiled to run. I know she’s more traumatised than she’s letting on. _PTSD._

Just when I thought everything would slot into place, I realise the absolute mammoth task ahead of us. _I’m so sorry I scared you,_ I voice, knowing my love will never overtly say it unless I take the lead.

 _I suppose, arrogantly, I thought I could still take you,_ Olivia confesses as she pulls me down to slip her arms around me.

I nuzzle her for several minutes before I push against her embrace. ‘I think we should ask Kate to look at you,’ I suggest, loathing that my Alpha is bleeding, _because of me._

‘Hey,’ Olivia cradles my face in her palms. ‘I’m bleeding because that psycho stabbed me,’ her eyes bore into mine. ‘You stopped when I asked you to. You have a conscience, and the most beautiful, giving and empathetic mind of anyone I’ve ever met,’ she finishes, searching my cloudy blues for belief. ‘You, Alexandra Cabot, will _never_ become Liz Donnelly.’

My Alpha hits the nail on the head. ‘ _Jesus,_ I love you,’ I whisper fiercely as we intertwine once more.

Minutes later, I murmur: ‘Right, Kate. Then George. We _need_  George.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was difficult to write as I wanted it to be imperfect and believable 
> 
> Hope you like.


	14. Togetherness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex reconnects with her pack.

We find everyone in my oversized kitchen. Looking at it now makes my soul cringe. _How many Omega’s could I have saved, over buying this monstrosity..?_

‘Perhaps let me go first,’ Liv suggests, both of us uncertain how I'll react to our pack, now that I’m most certainly transitioned. I nod my head, my anxiety from earlier ongoing as I observe my Alpha warn them. _Shit!_

When Olivia gestures for me, I step forward, cautiously. I’m terrified I’ll lunge toward Liv, or even Kate, hating that my body has shown itself to be utterly primal in moments of adrenaline fuelled desire.

Omi moves first, shortening what would otherwise have been an endless journey to reacquaint myself with the pack. _Thank you, Omi._

He gives me a half smile as we stop within inches of each other. He gives me a sniff and almost chokes on it. _‘Jezz_ Meg! You  _oozing_ power, lady!’ Omi states with his usual, and surprisingly refreshing, lack of tact. I smile despite myself, loving this man more than any other, ever, in the existence of man-kind.

I lean slightly forward to smell him. His scent had the strength of milky tea before. Still a threat but not as dangerous as a black coffee Alpha. I used this scale because I always hated both. Now, nothing, no scent whatsoever. _Figures. No threat at all._

I’m still surprised when he wraps his arms around me in a tight embrace; no fear, no caution in his actions. I love him for it. _I’m still just Alex to you._

_Sure are, baby girl._

After five minutes and several sniffed back tears, we release each other. ‘I’ve got a new nickname for you,’ he teases, a smirk dancing across his lips.

 _Oh no..._ I think playfully. _Okay, go on, tell me..._

‘Alf,’ he relents with a snigger.

I can’t help but laugh too. ‘Isn’t that the furry, alien, bear thing from children’s TV back in the 80’s?’ I ask, shaking my head, amused.

‘Maybe. Kinda apt don’t you think?’ he jokes, before biting his lip.

‘I kinda like Meg,’ I confess eventually, loving him for making me feel normal.

‘Thought you’d say that, so we made this...’ Omi says sheepishly, passing me a handmade card. The cover shows a light furred, big, powerful and beautiful Alpha wolf mounting a dark furred, smaller, yet still beautiful wolf. I gasp at the artistry, the metaphor. ‘That’s you,’ he points uselessly, making me chuckle, my eyes meeting my Alpha’s briefly. There's a soft glow to her features, as she observes my joy at this small but so very priceless gift.

I open the card to find it addressed to Meg/Alex/PBA (aka Particularly Badass Alpha). The messages inside are heart felt in their congratulations and admiration for their new top dog.

I feel renewed tears form in my eyes as I look from Omi, to my Alpha, to Kate, to George. _Our pack._

I tap Omi on the shoulder with the card before squeezing his arm. I watch as he steps back and Liv and Kate stride towards me, for our Omega’s protection.

The brave doctor stops several inches away from me. I can’t make out her scent because Olivia’s is too strong: _all smokey firewood and spice._ I close my eyes a moment, concentrating on her beautiful essence. _Gorgeous,_ I acknowledge before I can silence my thoughts. I feel the every growing waves of pleasure surge through me; my heart ricocheting in my rib cage as my mouth dries with want. _Oh God Olivia!_

I open my eyes to stunned expressions all round. I lick my lips before clearing my throat. _Mind if Liv steps back a bit? I can’t make out your scent with her stood there...._

 _That’s a good sign,_ George notes, from tens of feet away.

Kate nods her agreement as my Alpha steps back. I immediately pick up her scent: _lavender with hints of meadow._ I also pick up the fire burning in her eyes and the sheer adoration dripping from her every pore.  _This is a surprise,_ I air, thinking there’d be fear in her sparkling green orbs.

 _I’m not scared of you,_ she states confidently.

I shake my head, looking above her head to my Alpha. ‘You should be. I need you to look at Liv in a minute,’ I warn. The pack collectively turn to Olivia, who lifts her shirt sleeve; the bruising already starting to show. When she takes a step towards me, they notice the blood on her collar. 

A gasp echoes through the pack as all eyes return to me. I notice Kate swallow thickly as she wonders whether to risk hugging me or not, especially after... everything.

I stall her with a raised hand. ‘Maybe not quite yet. I’m freshly transitioned so I’m not as boundaried as perhaps I should be,’ I admit, thankful that I haven’t jumped Kate, but not trusting myself enough yet to touch her. _Especially_ following the shock of the orgasm she gave me.

‘Okay. Well I just want to say welcome back and you look even better than before,’ she voices as the pack waits for my reaction to her boldness.

‘Kate’s right, you know,’ Olivia agrees, _gazing into my soul with such searing heat, my..._

‘Alex...’ George suddenly whispers beside me; my senses so consumed by Olivia, not wanting to hurt Kate and trying to control my animal urges, I didn’t hear him approach. I know he purposely interrupted, to halt my train of thought. ‘Hi,’ he smiles, practically elbowing Kate out of the way so he can have some time with me.

‘Hi,’ I return his smile, pleased George is well after Olivia’s assault. I lean forward to sniff him. He smells much the same as Omi. _No scent at all._ Huang breathes a sigh of relief before lifting his arms to hug me. I hold him tightly, his spiky hair digging into my cheek, but I don’t care.

Finally, after the reintroductions, I gesture towards Olivia, my bleeding Alpha. ‘Kate, can you look at...’

‘Already there...’ she replies, striding purposefully towards my love. I follow suit, standing as close to Olivia as I can, without impeding Kate’s examination. ‘It looks like one of your scabs came off. That’s all,’ she reassures us as she assesses Olivia’s entire neck, to be sure she’s diagnosed correctly. The thorough doctor notices the deep bite wound under her right ear, eyeing me briefly.

_I’m a monster._

As Kate disinfects both wounds, Olivia grasps my hand. ‘No you’re not. It’s nothing I haven’t... You stopped, sweetie,’ my Alpha stresses, her eyes pleading.

‘Alex,’ George interrupts, his voice soft and even. ‘You stopped. You listened to Olivia?’ I nod, knowing to disagree would be a lie. ‘Biting is a very important part of the mating ritual, _especially_ when it comes to dominance. You have now reinstated you’re claim over your Alpha and she you by the looks of it...’ Huang states, eyeing my own bloodied collar. I stare at the crimson blotches, suddenly feeling bone-shattering relief at George’s effortless reframing.

I raise my eyes to meet his. _Don’t you dare ever leave us,_ I part-warn, part-beg as a smile creases his features.

 _Not a chance,_ he promises as he takes and squeezes my hand comfortingly. I’m about to pull away but his grasp tightens. _And we can talk about this further, if and when you need to,_ he offers, looking from me to Olivia.

We nod our heads and swallow thickly, knowing we will take him up in this offer, but also realising we are in the company of two Omega’s who don’t need to hear such matters.

I clear my suddenly blocked throat as my eyes only see my Alpha. I feel her heat, her aura, her essence. My pulse quickens as my breaths shallow markedly, my chest billowing as my senses drink in every fibre of Olivia Benson. _Christ!_

‘Meg, Liv,’ Omi interrupts our one track mind, this time. The waves of electricity sizzling between us is momentarily cut. ‘Sorry to shit on your parade but we’ve got problems...’

‘Donnelly?’ Olivia voices immediately, knowing.

‘Uhuh,’ Omi affirms, making my stomach clench and my legs shake. _Fuck!_ ‘Yeah, the news is going ape-shit. You’re wante’ for attempted homicide, Liv.’

I run to my Alpha. ‘No, no, _no!’_ I howl aloud, folding Olivia into my protective embrace. _No one fucking touches her! No one! That fucking devious, calculating, psycho-rapist, bitch...!_

Only when my love whimpers do I realise I’m holding her too tightly. I lessen my grip, but remain in full body contact.

Olivia eventually escapes my desperate arms. ‘Lex,’ she whispers, cradling my face and gazing into my cloudy blues. ‘This was bound to happen. She couldn’t have you, so no one can...’

‘And not to add insult to injury...’ George starts cautiously, biting his lip as he looks at me. ‘But... Judge Petrovsky has given you 24 hours to attend sentencing for your Ashton, Ashton and Daniels v Cabot case.’ My chest constricts painfully as the room begins to spin. ‘She warned that failure to do so would go against their human rights and result in a mistrial.’

 _What the FUCK?!_ my mind barks as I hold onto my love. _I can’t go through this ag..._ A heart-breaking whine escapes Olivia’s lips as I try to remain standing.

‘A _fucking_ pincer movement!’ Kate states hopelessly, as societies faceless protagonists throw a strategically aimed grenade, into the centre of our togetherness.


	15. Straining Hearts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex can`t concentrate

‘Before we go anywhere, I think we need to discuss our next move,’ the voice of reason voices as I struggle _not_ to take Olivia; my animal driven anxiety, utterly blinding. I feel her pulse hammer against my lips, my mouth brushing her neck blindly. _My Alpha_ , I breathe as she takes hold of my arms and extricates herself from my touch. 

‘Alex,’ she whispers, gazing into my eyes so intently, I reach for her once more. _‘Alex,_ we need to...’ 

‘I can’t... concentrate,’ I admit as I clutch her to me, desperately trying not to ravage her, right here, in front of everyone. _Jesus_ _Cabot!_  

‘Leave us,’ Olivia suddenly commands, her voice a thinly veiled hiss. My head snaps up, terrified she means _me_. My heart races as I notice my love staring at our pack. They dutifully leave. 

My breathing hitches as I comprehend what my Alpha is doing. As soon as the last whispers of pack mental chatter vacate our minds, Olivia’s lips are crushing mine. _Oh_ _Jes_ _..._ I moan as her hands clutch my butt, grasping and squeezing as though her life depends on it. _It does..._ I realise, my heart dropping to the floor as my love quickly cradles my jaw.  

 _Don’t..._ _later..._ _Right n_ _ow_ _,_ _I_ _need_ _you..._ her beautiful mind husks, her searching bronze eyes, her touch, her intentions, causing scorching pulses of heat to radiate through my senses. 

 _Fuck!_ I exclaim as Olivia’s powerful hands kneed my cheeks so fiercely, my knees almost buckle; her lips ravaging mine as my fingers glide thru her hair, pushing her backwards into the nearest countertop.  

My entire body shudders as my Alpha begins tearing at my shirt, making quick work of the frail material. I mirror her actions; her own shirt in tatters on the floor in seconds.  

 _Oh God_ _,_ _Lex!_ my heroine growls, her heat, arousal and fury erupting in a cloud of searing desire as she rapidly switches us; the countertop suddenly cutting into my lower back.  

I momentarily freeze at the sensation, _that_ sensation; _a knife scoring into my_ _..._ I reverse us, pushing Olivia down onto the work surface before she can fight me _._  

Her intuitive orbs check in, having noticed my body stiffen as well as my futile attempts to hide it. I grit my teeth to stop the traitorous tears, as I lower my mouth to her collar bone to halt her silent assessment.  

 _Lex?_ she questions stubbornly. I unclasp her bra, ignoring her quiet concern. Olivia breathlessly tugs at my chin, not allowing me to escape her enquiring mind. _Sweetie_ _?_  

I finally raise my watery eyes to hers, my lungs faltering as I try to catch my breath. She cradles my face, her expression soft and frightened, waiting for my reply. 

‘I... I can’t lose you,’ I whisper, terrified out of my skin, for my Alpha, my centre, my _only_ reason for living. Her strong arms wrap around my naked frame. Our hearts ricocheting, our lungs seizing. _My love._  

 _My life._  

My soul dies, hearing the deafening silence where my life partners reassurance _should_ be. But, to utter such false promises would be a lie. Still, it crushes us. I whimper into Olivia's neck as our arms squeeze ever tighter, challenging the fates to separate our oneness. 

Eventually, I reach up to itch my eye, finding my face wet from tears. _What the_ _hell_ _am I going to do without you?_ I ask, desperately breathing in her beautiful scent.  

I’m surprised when a chuckle reverberates thru my Alpha’s chest. ‘Sorry,’ she whispers into my ear. _It’s just... you’re the strongest, most incredible_ _being_ _I have ever_ _known_ _. You survived 22 years alone, abused,_ _desolate._ _But they never broke you._ Olivia continues, pulling away slightly to cradle my face. _You are now the most powerful status known to_ _man... wo_ _-_ _man,_ Olivia corrects quickly, causing a smile to curve my lips.  

My every fibre urges me to dine on my love's flesh; my core quivering with such blinding need, my chest billows with aching want. _You are a survivor, Alex. And_ _I will fight_ _,_ _to the death, to_ _journey_ _back_ _to you!_  

My limited will-power snaps as my Alpha’s words, scent and touch infuse my every nerve-ending. I clasp her nape as I crush her willing lips against mine. _Jes_ _..!_  

Our screaming minds hear only one voice; the surging heart beat, the quickened intake of breath, the deafening tsunami of blood rioting thru our veins, as moans, gasps and whimpers punctuate the air. 

I climb on top of Olivia, laid against the countertop, her naked breasts, chest and abdomen straining against the carnal desire erupting from her starving core. Her hand reaches behind my head, her fingers running thru my hair as she tugs me down to her lips.  

Her taste: firewood and spice, riots thru me as my palms clutch her jaw to deepen the earth-shattering kiss.  

My Alpha cups my right buttock under my panties as I part her thighs, causing her to arch into my flesh, her release so excruciatingly close.  

I hunger to bite her succulent neck, to utterly dominate her... _don’_ _t!_ I think forcefully, to stop myself hurting her. My clit urges me on, wanting me to devastate the intoxicating creature beneath me knowing, with every fibre of my being, that I could. _No!_  

I’m so distracted by my own thoughts, Olivia has to shake me to drag my attention back to this moment. ‘Lex? What am I doing to _you!’_ my love asks in a pained whine, knowing more than anyone, the torture I’m currently experiencing. She clutches my jaw, her eyes desperate in their desire, in their resolve, to save me. ‘My life, what do you need?’  

 _‘You,’_ I wheeze, hating that I’m a hairs breadth away from ravaging her. Tears race down to the hollows of my cheekbones, as my every muscle strains against the starving hunger raging thru my synapses.  

‘I _need_ you... too. Do you want... me... to... take over..?’ I gasp and whimper in hopeful relief as my Alpha takes control, of me, of us.  

She flips us effortlessly, her powerful frame suddenly over mine, her mouth owning my body as her lips trail a blazing path, between my breasts, to my achingly wet core. _Stay..._ she warns as I innately reach for her. I lay back down, my entire frame trembling with explosive heat and a near overwhelming need to dominate. I bite my lip, failing to silence a moan as I fight to surrender myself, my status, my body to the _only_ one I trust. _My love!_ my mind cries as I realise this may _be_ the last... 

My Alpha’s tongue silences my terror. Instead, a muffled whimper escapes my lips as Olivia licks, nibbles and sucks my clit to within an inch of my... _Oh my fucking.._ _!_ I howl, my fingers suddenly threading thru her short locks, pushing her further. I cry out in sheer ecstasy when she teases my entrance, a finger sliding inside me, waiting for my muscles to sheath around her, before a second joins it; her rhythm earnest in her drive to make me... _Liv!_ Her mouth latches onto my sensitive nub seconds before my insides shatter under the explosive weight of incomparable climax. My love continues to suck, lick and probe me, stroking my front wall to a second, mind-shattering orgasm, my clit swelling and contracting, as Olivia takes me relentlessly

I collapse, utterly spent; my breathing laboured, as my bodies wracked with soaringly exquisite aftershocks. Olivia's lips journey back up my heaving torso, meeting my gasping mouth as my entire form tingles with renewed promise. I run my fingers over her cheekbones; my lungs wheezing, my heart bursting as I try desperately to breathe. _Tef_ _... l... on!_ my mind howls, my Alpha immediately halts her pleasurable assault on my senses. 

 _Shit!_ Olivia exclaims, abruptly getting off me, noticing my paling lips. _Breathe sweetie. Breath_ _e_ _with me._ _Lex!_ _I’m_ _..._ _Breathe_ _!_  

My desire to give her pleasure is so overwhelmingly intense, my fingers reach for and succeed in brushing her sex, seconds before I pass out. 

 

‘... stress of all this...’  

 _I hear her. I hear my Alpha._ _You_ _haven’t left_ _me_ _yet..._ Reality hits like a speeding freight train, my soul shattering. I try desperately to open my eyes. _My love._ _Please!_  

‘Liv,’ I hear Kate whisper, her voice above me.  

‘Alex, open your eyes again for us, for _me_. _Please_ sweetie,’ I hear my Olivia beg, her voice low and anxious, as I urgently attempt to heed her request.  

 _Liv!_ my mind whimpers as I finally win the fight to drink in her beautiful features. _Are you alright?_  

 _Now I am,_ a slight smile quirks her lips despite herself.  

 _What_ _happened_ _?_ I finally ask, now I know my Alpha is _here_ , _safe_ and _well_. I gaze into her bronze orbs. 

I watch Olivia nod towards Kate. I glance at the good doctor, whose emerald green eyes meet my cloudy blue. _You don’t need to know right now_ _,_ our Omega states evasively. 

 _Kate?!_ I snarl, my stare icy and unforgiving.  

‘Your heart is weakened after...’ None of us need to voice it to know: _The second hell._ ‘I really should be ordering you bedrest for a month, but we all know you won’t do that...’ 

‘I’ve just _rested_ for two mon...’ I interrupt her, indignant. 

‘You laid down for _three_ weeks!’ Kate counters as fiercely. 

‘What are you saying, Kate?’ Olivia interjects, to stop our verbal sparring. 

‘I’m saying Alex has suffered another, more minor, heart attack. If she...’ Kate stops to look at me. ‘If you keep this up, you won’t last the year,’ she concludes, her voice hitching.  

I feel the residual blood drain from my face as a low whine escapes Olivia’s lips.  

‘You can’t keep thinking your body is as unbreakable as your mind, Alex. You have to stop. _Now_. Stop _fucking_. Stop agonizing over _every_ awful thing that has happened and _is_ happening. It’ll kill you.’ Her harsh words are offset by the softest expression her green eyes can muster.  

 _‘How?’_ my love chokes, knowing to halt these most human of thoughts and actions will be impossible.  

‘Up your Nitroglycerin and time apart from _you_. I’m sorry Olivia but right now, you’re the main reason Alex's heart can’t cope,’ Kate states _so_ brutally, I fear looking at my Alpha, in case these words pierce her remaining resolve. 

Silence reigns for several moments as I feel my, and my loves, world being torn apart. Tears streak my cheeks as I finally take in the harrowing sight of my Olivia: her mouth working silently as a tsunami of hurt pours from her pain-stricken orbs. 

I feel a presence beside me. _George_. ‘Kate's right, even though it hurts like hell,’ he says so softly, I hardly hear him, my eyes seeing _only_ my Alpha. 

I watch as she begins nodding her head soundlessly, knowing, as I do, that their heart-breaking words hold _the_ horrifying truth: Olivia’s scent will kill me, if we don’t... _We need to part, to survive._  

 _I love you, my everything._  

 _I love you, my heroine._  

Olivia steps toward me, suddenly cautious of her impact, her scent, on my frail heart. Kate nods her head in reassurance before my Alpha nuzzles my damp cheek; our chests billowing with a multitude of emotions currently battling for dominance, ripping thru our helpless bodies like shards of glass. _Oh God!_  

‘Liv, Meg,’ Omi finally speaks, having watched this entire scene unfold. ‘I love you guys, but we _need_ a plan. _Now._ And I _ain’t_ leaving neither one of you!’ he utters, his voice breaking as he comes to stand next to us.  


	16. On The Move

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The pack galvanise.

It takes twenty exhausting minutes to convince the pack that I _mean_ it when I say I _won’t_ rest before we tackle the next phase of our  _tumultuous_ journey. George and Kate are particularly vocal; my Alpha silently watches me, her expression unsurprised but sickly pale with worry. Olivia Benson will _forever_ be my Alpha.

_Call me stupid, reckless, pig headed; I don’t care. There is no way I’ll allow my love to walk into a potentially combative and suspicious precinct, alone, unprotected. Even if it does raise eyebrows._

Omi called ahead, asking and thankfully gaining Cragen's support; the Captain's tone conveying his glee at being contacted by one of his absent, healing officers. Don voiced his concerns regarding me attending the precinct with Olivia, _attending_ at all. Omi explained certain things had changed but didn’t disclose anything further.

This olive branch was initiated whilst _already_ journeying to said precinct, to stop any potential recording devices informing their creepy masters that the gang rape prosecutor and the attempted murderer cop are no longer in hiding.

Huang stayed home, to prevent any conflict of interest arguments ruining his career. But more specifically, to protect and continue his innovative research into the truths and injustices within the human hierarchical system. _Yes, it’s best George stay home._

Kate should also have kept herself _less_ associated, having been another witness in our... _my_ ground-breaking case. _Ground-breaking in my eyes at least._

The reason this argument remained _only_ twenty minutes: acquiescing to Kate riding with us, in the Tesla. _For my health, she said. Damn Omega’s,_ I think wryly, knowing I was the _most_ stubborn and determined of them all. _Was..?_ The notion still so alien. Even so, Kate is the only physician I’ll _ever_ allow to assess me, to touch me, again... _Breathe._

I turn to my beautiful Alpha; my ultimate distraction. She’s gazing at me with her comforting bronze warmth; squeezing my hand for the thirtieth time. _Want to talk about it?_

My heart shatters at her sheer love and thoughtfulness. _Even whilst my Alpha is being driven, assuredly, into custody; potentially for..._ she squeezes my hand again... _you still offer me the opportunity to explore any and all my heinous experiences at the hands of doctors, consultants, general physicians..._ I swallow down my nausea, shaking my head incredulously. Omi glances at me briefly thru the rear view mirror.

I turn to my love; breathing in her essence and lifting a hand to stroke the hair at the back of her nape. _My Alpha... if this truly is as the news suggests, I will defend you. Then, once we win, I’ll hunt down that festering excuse of a survivor and finish the job!_

I watch as she grits her teeth, her acute arousal and present anxiety evident in her intoxicating orbs. She grasps my fingers stroking her nape and places them at her lips, kissing each in turn before pulling me to her; her mouth utterly owning mine as we clutch desperately at the last chaste moments of intimacy, behind the darkened rear windows, before reality crashes down on our souls.

As Omi parks the car outside the precinct, I’m amazed the crowds haven’t latched on to my Pure Blood Om... _Oh_. It takes me a moment to remember I’m no longer an Omega. My heart surges with renewed confidence and anger. My stuttering breaths are quick to remind me of my weakness. I inhale deeply, attempting to quieten my ricocheting heart as my love gazes at me with such searing focus, I melt in a pool of liquid arousal.

I don’t have it in me to stop her exploring gaze, her bronze orbs slowly take in the entirety of me. I follow her lead; my eyes devouring her perfection. I feel my heart bruising my ribcage as Kate turns to us, signalling our need to stop. Olivia breaks the contact first, knowing not doing so could kill me.

In this moment, and every second prior to it, I’m utterly certain I’d die to keep my Alpha safe, free and by my side.

I inhale a shuddering breath, hoping my fragility won’t scupper our final moments. _Final..._

I stare at my love's succulent mouth, so full and inviting. I bite my own lip to stop myself tasting her. I watch her looking at me with orgasm inducing want; my core beginning to twitch with every second we...

‘My life,’ Olivia purrs, causing my clit to swell in earnest. I swallow as I gaze into her honeycomb orbs. ‘I love you.’ So simple. So heart-breaking.

I brush my brow against hers briefly; our chests straining once more. I _know,_ I respond, cupping her jaw tenderly. _I'll howl my love from the highest skyscrapers, when we win,_ I promise; the whole pack aware winning involves fighting Olivia’s case, justice for all Omega’s AND the desecration of one Elizabeth Moira Donnelly.

‘Sorry baby girl, but think we better bugg before the vultures smell our meat,’ Fin suggests softly, his eyes apologising as his sensible words hit their mark.

 _But not before I taste my Alpha one... last... time._ My lips hunger for her as Olivia acquiesces, gladly, to my parting wish. She cradles my jaw and cheekbones, her thumbs stroking my hollows as my fingers journey to her nape, threading thru her tousled locks. I take her mouth, wholly, completely; our breathing laboured as our bodies come alive; swelling, contracting, trembling and pulsating to a rhythm entirely of our own making. _Oh God!_

And just as quickly, my Alpha pulls her intoxicating lips from mine; her need to save me overruling the want I know is radiating thru her every nerve-ending.

We belatedly turn to our Omega's, whose eyes are unabashedly staring, in awe of our love. They try desperately to silence their mental chatter but both Olivia and I hear it clearly; their absolute adoration, heart-break and wonder of us, their Alpha’s. I blush crimson under the scrutiny. Our embarrassment galvanises us. _Okay,_ I husk breathlessly, trying to quieten my obvious arousal. _Lets_   _see how strong my scent really is._

My hand trembles as I grasp the car door handle; the reality of the last 22 years agonisingly difficult to shake, knowing this would have been my heat week. _Breathe Cabot,_ I self-sooth as the others stare at me. _Please, stop staring. I’ve got this!_ I think more harshly than intended; quietly keeping an eye on Omi.

_I’m fine, Meg._

_Shit._ He clocks me. I turn away.

 _Meg?_ he draws my attention once more, his soft brown eyes melting my resolve. _On three... Okay?_ he asks _only_ me. I nod my head and square my shoulders. _One..._ I squeeze the handle, feeling the metal cold and clinical in the palm of my hand. _Two..._ I bite my lip, my body primed, adrenaline infusing my veins as terror threatens to engulf me. _Three..._ I lever it so aggressively, the door lurches open sharply, causing me to nearly face plant the road; if not for the steadying arms of my incredible Alpha.

 _Sorry Liv,_ I whisper, mortified that I’ve made a very clear spectacle of our planned low-key entrance, and been distracted by my own triggers whilst doing it.

 _Lex, look at me..._ my love requests softly, her enthralling orbs making me want to destroy the world, to be with her. _We need to move. Now._ The seriousness of her tone grounds me.

I search for and find soft, but anxious, brown eyes; thankful to have such a loyal friend by our side, as my Alpha gestures toward the back entrance.

 _Take care, Liv. We’re here for you. Nail the bitch!_ Kate imparts passionately, before the Tesla screeches past us; our Omega using impressive evasive tactics to avoid further unwanted scrutiny, disappearing into the hive of rush hour within seconds; to park up and wait.

It’s only then, I realise people are staring at us. They’re not approaching or encroaching. Surprisingly, they’re keeping a respectful distance, but mixed emotions cross their features. _Liv,_ I swallow in alarm, _knowing_ they’re about to charge us. I realise I’m routed to the spot, frozen with fear that I’m... we’re about to be assaulted... _again._

 _Lex! Remember who you are. You’re free,_ my Alpha states earnestly as my body starts moving without conscious thought. I stride forward, easily keeping pace with my Alpha and Omega.

_Breathe Cabot._

We finally near the back entrance of the precinct; our breathing shallow and rapid as our anxiety from being out in public for the first time since our second hell, finally subsiding to a new knowing: _my scent, my status HAS changed._

I gaze at my love, knowing it’s time I return the favour, the courage and love she has shown me. _All the times you has put yourself in mortal danger for me; saved me. It’s time I fight for my Alpha, and I will do just that, or die trying._

A low whine, the only indication Olivia heard me.


	17. Cornered

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The pack find out how far Donnelly may be willing to go.  
> Certain disclosures are made.

We stalk thru the back door; immediately greeted by Cragen. His gentle eyes assess his detectives before they centre on me.  

 _‘Christ!_ Somethings changed about you,’ he states so frankly, Omi laughs. I stare at the Captain, still wary of him after he admitted he couldn’t trust himself around me pre-transition; because his partner murdered my grandmother. _But, he had the_ _wherewith all_ _to step back._  

‘Cap,’ Liv steps forward to save me from further scrutiny. _Always my Alpha._ She looks at me fleetingly before turning back to Cragen. ‘How bad is it?’ she asks quietly, squaring her shoulders to steal herself for Don's answer.  

My heart-rate soars as my every fibre screams to comfort her. I can’t help but link our index fingers; a jolt of arousal surging thru my veins. I know my Alpha feels it too, her heart beat quickening and her breath catching in an instant. I release her. 

Cragen watches our silent exchange, seemingly _still_ intoxicated by us, before he finds his voice. ‘It’s bad.’ I sense the slight tensing of Olivia’s shoulders. ‘Let’s not talk here,’ Cragen suggests thoughtfully. ‘Follow me,’ he whispers, as we follow his lead. 

The gossip grape-vine has clearly filtered thru the entire precinct by this point. There is no use in hiding. Even so, feeling overtly observed and gawked at as we walk to our destination, succeeds in igniting my fight/flight/freeze response. I grind my teeth to stop myself yelling them all to hell; _hating_ that these people are watching us with judgement, suspicion and lust.  

 _Lex?_ Olivia breathes, her beautiful bronze eyes gazing at me in quiet reassurance. _You’re free,_ she reminds me as I realise, I'm frozen in the middle of the bullpen, my hackles raised in open terror and rage at the expressions crossing each and every face in the room. _Screw_ _‘_ _em_ _, okay?_   

I turn from her intoxicating orbs and look down at my feet, willing them to work. When I still can’t move, Omi gives me the tiniest shove, aiding my forward momentum. _Thanks Omi._  

 _No problem_ _,_ _Meg._  

We finally enter Cragen’s office, Don swiftly shutting the door to give us privacy. It doesn’t escape our notice when two uniformed officers are abruptly stationed outside his office. 

 _This_ _shits_ _real people,_ Omi concludes warily as Olivia locks eyes with me. 

 _I love you._  

 _I love you_ , she swallows thickly.  

Cragen clears his throat, subtly breaking our renewed absorption. ‘Please sit,’ he suggests, with everyone still standing awkwardly. We sit; Liv in the middle, Omi and I either side of her: _a_ _u_ _nited front._ ‘I would say it’s good to see you, _all_ of you,’ he stresses, looking at me. ‘Seeing you all looking well, fit and...’ 

‘Cap,’ Omi abruptly interrupts him. ‘We’re all fine. Bumps, scraps and bruises pretty much gone. We thank you for your concern and all, but we don’t have time for small talk. Let’s cut the crap. What’s happening for Liv?’  

Both my Alpha and I look at him with melting hearts.  

‘Judge Donnelly is going after you like a rabid dog,’ Cragen states without further preamble, looking towards Olivia. ‘She’s one pissed mama and she’s got one _hell_ of a hard on for you,’ he continues, making his point. 

My love glances towards me, always asking for my permission and input. _Can I?_ I nod my head once. 

‘She’s got a hard on for Alex,’ my Alpha growls as comprehension hits the Captain. I force myself to keep my eyes raised, on him, whilst my stomachs churns with all-consuming nausea.  

‘She tried...’ Cragen doesn’t finish his sentence. He doesn’t need to. 

 _Yes_ , I whisper, softly, quietly; soundlessly to a non-pack member. 

I clear my throat, wanting to own this. ‘Donnelly groomed me for months. Volunteering to preside over my case, the invitation to hide out in her mountain retreat throughout the trial, her infiltration into our pack, were all part of her strategy to take me from my... Olivia,’ I state hurriedly, before I lose my nerve.  

Cragen nods his head several times, aware this behaviour would be realistic of most mere mortals standing anywhere in the vicinity of Alexandra Cabot. _But.... '_ Somethings changed since I last saw you,’ he reflects again, his brow furrowed as he gazes at me in overt confusion. ‘I can’t...’ 

Olivia looks to me. I lean forward. ‘I’ve transitioned Captain. I’m no longer a Pure Blood Omega.’ Cragen’s confusion doesn’t dissipate. ‘But we’re going off topic here...’ 

We watch as a plethora of emotions so polar flitter across his face, I worry for the mans sanity. 

 _Christ!_ ‘Cap,’ my Alpha takes over, knowing the man better than I do. ‘Omega's can transition to become Alphas. They can save themselves from constant abuse by pairing with another Omega. Like two negatives making a positive,’ she begins to explain. I hate that we're speaking about me when this is _her_ meeting. _My love_ _._ ‘If there is _any_ justice in the world, Alex will never be... raped again.’ I shrink into my chair and feign interest in my hands. I desperately want to change the subject. ‘We had to push forward Alex's transition when I found Donnelly on top of her. I saw red...’ 

‘Liv, are you admitting you grievously assaulted Elizabeth Donnelly?’ Cragen interrupts Olivia, wanting to be absolutely sure she knows what she’s about to do: making herself complicit in the GBH of a New York City judicial member.  

‘I’m _admitting_ to seeing red after finding _her_ on top of my... _goddammit_... Alex.’ I reach out to clasp my Alpha's fisted hand. _I’m sorry._  

 _Never apologise for being_ _abused, my life. Please!_ _?_ her mind begs, her bronze orbs searching my features.  

 _I’ll try_. I squeeze her hand briefly before withdrawing my touch, just in case those two sentinels are watching. 

‘This Donnelly bitch is one sicko. She tried to groom Meg... _Alex_... for months. She rap...’ Omi quickly stops himself; both Olivia and I turning to him in alarm.  

‘She what?’ Cragen asks for clarification, wanting to be sure he surmised correctly. ‘Donnelly raped you?’ he asks me in a gentle voice. 

I sit up in my seat, passionately wanting to avoid being seen as a shrinking violet. ‘No, she wasn’t raping me when Liv walked in. But you _need_ to know she is capable of rape,’ I stress as I lean forward once more, desperately _needing_ the Captain to believe us, for Olivia's sake. ‘She’s guilty of grooming, sexual assault, knowingly allowing acts of extreme violence/cruelty, rape and three counts of attempted homicide.’ 

‘What the _actual_ hell, people?’ Cragen mutters as Omi whistles thru his teeth.  

‘You sayin' that bitch caused... _your_ heart attack, Liv's stabbing and my...’ Omi asks, his expression incredulous. I notice his hands start to clench in ever tighter circles until his fists are white with the force of it.  

‘Omi,’ I stand and approach him, crouching in front of his trembling form; placing a hand gently on his knee. ‘Look at me, Omi.’ He finally does, after struggling to contain his rage and excruciating hurt. 

‘That bitch bein' all nice and friendly. But all she wante’ or cared abou' was you! Not even _you,’_ he spits, utterly repulsed by the evil lurking in one Judge Elizabeth Donnelly. 

‘And we can prove it,’ Olivia voices confidently, beside us. Omi turns to my Alpha as I reach for some tissues Cragen's offered. I hand them to our Omega. _Oh Omi, we’ve got you_ _,_ I promise as tears prickle my own eyes, _knowing_ , more than anyone, the feelings currently rioting thru our dearest friend.  

‘Liv, what?’ Omi asks, once he finds his voice. He places his hand on mine and squeezes with all the hope we suddenly feel. 

‘I can prove the grooming, the indecent behaviour, the knowingly allowing acts of extreme cruelty and the attempted homicides,’ my love repeats. 

‘How?’ Cragen queries, his own body leaning forward, desperate for my Alpha’s words to be true.  

‘She invited me to her hospital room, after she was taken there by Fin and Kate,’ my Alpha discloses. 

‘Why? That doesn’t make sense after you’ve beaten her up,’ Don surmised.  

Olivia leans further forward in her chair, her fingers working overtime. _‘Exactly._ She wanted me to finish the job, as her dreams of becoming Alex's Alpha were in tatters...’ 

‘I would never _willingly_ leave Olivia,’ I intercede.  

My love nods once, her eyes conveying all I need her to. _I love you_. ‘Donnelly admitted to pretty much _everything_. _Everything_ ,’ my Alpha stresses; her eyes pinning her Captain. ‘Its all recorded,’ Olivia shares, her voice almost gleeful. 

‘It’s only useful _if_ the presiding judge deems it admissible,’ I remind everyone in the room, dampening my heroine’s smug confidence.  

‘Are we _really_ going to court, Cap?’ Olivia asks the pertinent question as I cradle Omi's face for a mini-second, wiping away the last of his tears with my thumb. _Always my Omi._  

 _Enough already, Meg!_ I withdraw and move back to my seat, brushing my Alpha’s shoulder as I pass.  

‘It looks like it,’ Cragen admits, leaning on his desk with a sigh. ‘It stinks. _That_ Lionel Granger is going to be her lawyer!’ I audibly gulp. _Oh God_ _, not him!_ ‘Oh how fair and law abiding, our judicial and legal system is!’ he splutters with ill-concealed anger.  

‘That’s idiotic and  _c_ _learly_ a conflict of interests,’ I voice, ignoring our own disregard for said interests, for the past six months. _Hypocrites_. ‘This should be tried in a different county. State, even,’ I stress, shaking my head at the absurdity of this unfairness. I ignore the greater implication that Donnelly and Granger may have _both_ been playing the long game. ‘I've never heard of a defence attorney, prosecuting a criminal case,' I shake my head, incredulous. 'Who would be presiding?’  

‘Petrovsky,’ Cragen huffs, knowing the collective response before the name is out of his mouth.  

I inhale sharply. _There’s no way I can help if the judge presiding over my case sentencing is also presiding_ _over Olivia’s assault_ _charge._ _The bastards!_ Then a comforting thought strikes me: _the DA's office makes the final decision on exculpatory evidence, not the seemingly bent judicial coven._

A knock at the door sounds an unwelcome visitor. All four of us turn round, instantly regretting it when the smarmy, fake-tanned features of said attorney, suddenly come into view. 

‘Don’t tell me you three rule breaking pigs,’ he sweeps Cragen, Fin and Olivia. ‘... and the cock-tease...’ his hungry eyes creep up my body. ‘... are having a meeting without the victim’s representative present?’  

I stand up and move, against my instincts, towards him. _My greatest test yet._ As hoped, the coward soon lowers his head.

‘What..?’ he stammers, backing away from me as I gain on him. I try not to smile as I corner him. ‘Get away from me, you... what the hell?’ 

His reaction tells me two things: _this lecherous_ _bastard_ _will never_ _use sexually suggestive remarks towards me or actively look at me wantonly, _again._ Or physically hurt_ _me_ _._ _AND h_ _e and Donnelly can’t be_ _in cahoots or_ _he'd_ _be less_ _surprised by the obvious_ _change._ _.._ _Unless Donnelly didn’t expect a successful transition_ _?_  

I can’t stem the smirk that plays at my lips. ‘Are you scared of a Pure Blood Omega, Lionel?’ I near purr as I step within inches of his quaking and cornered form. He doesn’t speak or can’t speak; his face contorted in fear. ‘And what’s with a defence attorney representing a _victim?_ _’_ I ask sarcastically. ‘You’re client got something to hide?’ 


	18. Plain Illegal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex deals with an annoyance.  
> Olivia is in trouble.

I watch him cower in front of me. I admit I’m getting a kick out of reducing _one_ of my tormentors to a quivering wreck. ‘You have no _legal_ right to be here,’ I challenge, furious at his attempts to vilify Olivia before she’s _even_ been charged. ‘Detective Benson hasn’t been charged yet. You're breaching her human rights to private counsel,’ I continue, wanting to verbally pulverise him. ‘Get. Out. Of. My. Sight before I call Branch and have you stuck off for good,’ I finally conclude my offensive.  

Defence Creep looks to Cragen for aide. Finding none forthcoming, he slowly straightens; a flush of embarrassment invading his cheeks at his complete devolution in front of three pigs and a cock-tease.  

I level my most hauntingly icy gaze on his mortified features, as my pack look on, their souls stirred and their breath taken by my first overtly public show of dominance.  

Defence Creep swiftly vacates the Captain's office, his tail firmly lodged between his legs.  

I breathe shakily as my Alpha immediately stands by my side. _Don’t touch me Liv,_ I order roughly, turning away from her; not wanting the two sentinels to suspect our relationship. Olivia heeds my request, settling for keeping her presence close, behind me. _You okay?_ she enquires carefully, not wanting to ignite my ire or arousal. 

 _Uhuh_ _,_ I affirm wordlessly, desperately trying to avoid Cragen reading how utterly invigorating and empowering that experience was, for this lowly Texan _. I really am a Pure Blood Alpha..._ my mind celebrates with absolute relief. I let my shoulders rise and fall, my chest expand and contract, with several lung-busting breaths.   

 _That was so... hot, Alex!_ my love husks into my neck. Only when I allow her thoughts to filter thru my entire being, do I realise Olivia is mirroring the _exact_ same reactions, feelings and emotions that I felt when she punched Stabler, months back, in _my_ honour. I feel her struggle to contain her carnal desires; my senses drinking in her perspiration, her ricocheting heart, her seizing lungs, her twitching clit... her unsteady breaths, as my body remains frozen in pure sexual frustration. Moving _one_ muscle will melt my weakening resolve.  

 _You... need... to back.. off, my Alpha..._ I convey desperately, my _need_ for her overwhelming everything else.  

 _Meg, Liv, stop fuckin' a_ _round_ _!_ our voice of reason, evaporates our heat within seconds. Or maybe Olivia stepping back helped. Either way, when I finally turn round to face the room, only Omi's mouth is dry.  

I try not to stare at Cragen; his face red and sweaty. _Oh God!_ my mind screams in silent disgust, as I try desperately to ignore his obvious arousal. 

Olivia clocks him. _Lex..._  

Again, against my better judgement, I step towards the potential danger. ‘Captain, I _need_ to know what you are feeling,’ I whisper earnestly, Cragen being the first person to convey signs of overt arousal around me, besides Olivia... and Kate... _fuck!_  

Don bravely maintains eye contact as he clears his throat, _knowing_ precisely what I’m asking, and feeling a core deep mortification and shame because of it. ‘I... as soon as I saw you, I sensed a hierarchical change, a power and dominance about you. But...’ _Shit!_ My Alpha tenses beside me. ‘... I still feel a pull, an attraction... an arousal.’  

I close my eyes for mere seconds, my forever ready adrenaline fuelled alertness, seeping noxiously back into every fibre of my being. _Oh God!_ I repeat as Olivia steps in front of me, protectively.  

‘Liv,’ I murmur, not entirely sure what I was about to say. She turns to me at once, her hands cradling my face. _The sentinels,_ I warn, causing her to lower them; her eyes bursting with a plethora of emotions. _I can’t.._ _._  

Cragen gestures to us, regaining our attention. ‘Even though I feel a pull...’ I swallow thickly, my insides screaming. ‘I _sense_ your dominance. I know you’re physically, emotionally, hierarchically _stronger_ than me,’ he attempts to calm my rioting heart, my frozen frame, my dilated pupils. ‘I _know_ you could kick my ass,’ he continues. ‘I _didn’t_ before and I sure as hell wouldn’t now,’ he stresses. 

 _I loath that one, we're talking about me again; two, the Captain is verbalising every pull persons fantasy: raping me._ I’d ignorantly thought my newfound status would dissolve all thoughts of sex, lust and animal need. _The transition didn’t make me any less... desirable. Its just made me less defenceless._ I shiver violently. _I’m a complete idiot!_  

 _Lex,_ Olivia interrupts my self- beration as Omi gazes at me with his gentle, brown orbs _._  

 _I can’t stand it_ _!_ He snaps his head away quickly, realising he’s looking at me sympathetically.  

 _You can fight them off, my life,_ my Alpha voices, earnestly. 

 _Just like you did during_ _Hell!_ I snarl back, feeling furious at myself for being so utterly stupid, for allowing my anger to bleed out, for snapping _that_ , of all things, at my heroine _._   _I’m not un-rape-able. What a fucking..._  

_Alex..._

_Alpha's,_ one of the only voices we'd both quieten for, invades our thoughts. _I can only imagine how you’re feeling, Alex,_ he uses my given name. _But punishing yourself won’t do_ _n_ _o_ _good, right now._ I stare at him, loathing myself all the more for being so self-centred. 

 _I’m sorry,_ my mind whispers as I try to get a grip of myself. My Alpha envelopes me then, to hell with the sentinels. _I’m so sorry Liv. I just..._  

 _I know..._  

 _And Defence Creep..._  

 _I know..._  

 _..._ _h_ _e was here for a reason... I just can’t think w_ _hy_ _the hell he..._  

‘We‘ll get to the bottom of it. I promise,’ Olivia whispers against my temple before kissing my forehead _._  

‘I can’t lose you,’ I keen desperately, my entire body trembling in her arms.  

‘You won’t... _ever!’_ my Alpha states earnestly, her jaw clenching against my cheekbone as she tries to halt her tears. 

A knock at the door signals a second intruder. I push Olivia away quickly and wipe at the traitorous tears flowing down my face.  

‘Come in,’ Cragen growls before the sentinels' step inside.  

‘Olivia Benson, I am arresting you on suspicion of attempted murder. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you do...’ The rest goes by unheard, my every muscle straining to kill these men cuffing and man-handling my _detective_ out of the Captain's office. I feel Omi standing beside me, rage oozing from his every pore. I follow my love; my mind numb and deathly quiet.  

 

Olivia is taken to a cell used for holding politicians, bankers, high society criminals _._  The _hidden_ cell; away from prying eyes, including mine. F _or privacy, and to prevent us being together._ Cragen’s attempts at arguing due process led to threats of misconduct and a disciplinary. I stepped in, but was cut off by the two sentinels slamming the door _behind_ them; my Alpha cuffed and defenceless to whatever they have planned. _No!_  

‘They could be killing her in there!’ I seethe, quietening every muscle screaming at me to tear at the reinforced door. _Don't!_  

Omi stands two feet away, quietly raging; his body coiled so tightly, I fear he'll kill someone. _Not before me,_ I promise, as I hear a thud from within. _What the fuck?_ _!_  I stalk to the cell door, hammering it with all my might; my resolve to _not_ react, gone. _My_ _A_ _lpha!_  

 _Don't_ _..._ _Lex_ _..._ _p_ _lease_ _!_  

‘Olivia!’ I howl in despair _._  

‘Miss Cabot,’ an unfamiliar voice calls from behind me, making me jump. I halt my assault on the steadfast door; my chest billowing heavily as I try to catch my breath, my eyes ablaze in fury. ‘Uh... a... a call for you,’ she stammers, fighting her fear and arousal at the sight of the seething, flaxen haired goddess in front of her.  

I swallow down an icy retort, instead I clench my fists and hope I’m not trembling. ‘No... one I know... knows I’m here,’ I state thru gritted teeth, my good breeding calling for manners, even as I hear bone make contact with skin. _My love!_ I flinch, turning back to the _fucking_ door keeping me from protecting my Olivia. 

‘Well... um... Judge Petrovsky does,’ the unknown speaks again, freezing my nerves with every syllable.  

 _Friend_ _o_ _r foe?_ I know I have little choice. I nod to Omi to stay put as I follow the unknown; my every sinew begging me to remain and fight for my life partner. _I_ _lov_ _e y_ _o_ _u_ _._  


	19. Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex is alone for the first time, in public, since she ran out on Olivia, after the detective beat up her partner, Stabler.

As I leave, I subconsciously white-knuckle grip the doorframe; my body urging me to stay, my psyche warning me this could be a trap. I look back at the cell, then Omi. _Stay_ _here_ _until_ _they open that God damn door_ _, no matter what._ _Understood_ _?_ I order, using every ounce of dominance I possess to drive my command home.  

 _I’ve got you_ _, Meg_. Omi audibly whines as I turn away. I bite my tongue to silence my own whimper; the cell within which my reason for living is being held captive, defenceless and surrounded, _deathly_ quiet.  

 

I follow the unknown into the crowded bullring. My senses are heightened still further as I realise I’m utterly outnumbered and alone, in a room packed with strangers. _Home_ _f_ _or 22_ _years_ _,_ I acknowledge hauntingly _._  

She motions to an antique rotary telephone sat atop the only free desk in the place, the receiver waiting. _Here?_ I ask silently, quirking my eyebrow at the near panting unknown. I note with excruciating clarity when the room falls silent; feeling every pair of eyes on me: the Pure Blood Omega, the multiple rape victim, the case winner, the possible accessory to attempted murder. _Jesus_ _!_  

‘Leave,’ I murmur to the unknown thru clenched teeth. She doesn't. _Fuck_ _!_ my mind yells, recognising the subtle signs of an ambush. I tense every muscle as I wait for the first non-consensual touch to violate my skin; my heart racing, my lungs seizing, my palms sweating, my pulse deafening, as my every cell anticipates the gang-rape that will kill me. _No_ _._ I stare down the thirty strong crowd as the unknown steps toward me. _No!_ I flinch before my body innately takes a defensive stance. _Years of practice..._  

‘I know Karate,’ she says almost redundantly. 

 _A_ _s... do... I!_ I seethe, wondering why she’s threatening me when most generally take, without preamble.  

‘As in I can protect you whilst you take your phone...’ she starts. 

I interrupt her, remembering my transition. ‘I can protect myself,’ I blurt aggressively, hating that our discussion is being observed with great interest. _Olivia doesn't have time for this_ _._ ‘As you were!’ I spit towards the avidly staring crowd, seething and terrified in equal measure. Miraculously, they submit to my dominance, immediately going about their business. _Oh_ _._ I exhale deeply as the unknown eyes me with renewed vigour. ‘Thank you for offering your support, but I no longer require it, from _anyone_ ,’ I stress as she finally steps back. 

I pick up the receiver, making sure to keep the wall at my back, the rabble in front. _Old habits die hard._  

I purposely don’t speak, my gut feeling: this is a trap. _One, separate the lovers. Two, assault one and... what... the other...?_ I swallow thickly, a lump materialising in my throat. My slight intake of breath, and the receiver cord untangling, the only signs of my presence on the line. 

‘Alexandra?’ _Petrovsky_ , I recognise dully, not knowing exactly who or what I was expecting. ‘Is that you?’ I stay quiet a moment longer, aware people are generally uncomfortable with telephone silence. _That_ _is, apart from Lena_ _Petrovsky_ _._ I lose my own game. _No time._  

‘Lena,’ I whisper, my nerves jittering for a more private conversation. The raucous melee in front of me suddenly feels helpful. _Nothing like a deafening chorus to mute one voice._ My entire body shudders. Another ingrained experience, _but this time, I don’t_ _want_ _to be heard_. 

Identifying myself appears to silence the dowager judge. I bite my lip, trying to remain patient. Though my every muscle screams to return to that _fucking_ door, _to m_ _y heroine._  

‘You’re in grave danger, Alexandra.’ _Tell me something I_ _don’t_ _know_ _,_ my head retorts as I shiver at the probable evils being imprinted on my Alpha's flesh. ‘You need to go back into hiding, now!’ 

‘Tell me why I should believe you?’ I whisper aggressively, my trust in the judicial system, non-existent. 

‘Honestly, I don’t know,’ Lena answers bluntly, surprising me. ‘But I know Liz Donnelly is after you. She’s one scorned banshee and she has her sights set on you, Alexandra.’ My stomach drops nauseatingly. _Fuck!_ ‘You _need_ to get back in hiding, now. Before she kills you or your...’ 

‘My what?’ 

‘Your detective...’ Petrovsky counters. My lungs batter my ribcage as I beg my body not to give me away. ‘Alexandra?’ 

‘Om... Fin Tutuola?’ I attempt a pathetic ruse. 

 _‘Really_ , Alexandra? Are we going to play _that_ game too?’ _S_ _hit!_  

‘You plastered a deadline over _every_ news station, _every_ website!’ I snap, _urgently_ needing to get back to my love.  

‘Only _after_ Detective Benson was announced as wanted. I’d hoped it would distract...’ 

‘You _fucking_...’ 

 _‘Alexandra!’_ I bite my lip to silence my next rebuttal. _Let her hang herself._ ‘I’m sorry for all that’s happened and is happening to you. But don’t you dare...’ 

‘What do you know of what’s happening to me?’ I challenge her true intent. 

‘I know you’re at the precinct, _obviously_. And that _your_ Detective is currently under arrest. I know Liz wants you and won't stop until she has you...’ Nausea threatens to invade my mouth. ‘I know you don’t trust anyone or anything. And you’re no doubt wondering how I know all this?’ Lena asks, rhetorically. _Because you’re up Donnelly's..._ I swallow harshly, trying to prevent the ever-threatening bile from outing my overriding emotion: terror; my grip on the receiver vicelike. I daren’t move a muscle as the agonising pause continues. ‘You _need_ to disappear, go into hiding, _now!’_  

‘Where would that lead? To three untamed animals being released back onto the streets? Convey to _every_ Omega that rape won’t be challenged; that it’s their _duty_ to suffer it? That rape is _acceptable_ , a societal norm, a _Goddamn_ given _right!?’_ _I can’t stop. I won’t stop_. ‘I’d rather die than role over for the next rapist. It’d kill me to be complicit in the sexual slavery of every Omega on this planet,’ I pause to catch my breath. ‘I’ve risked _everything_. Why would I stop now?’ 

‘Because it _will_ kill you,’ Petrovsky states with absolute conviction. 

‘I’d rather die routing for the underdogs, than live knowing every fifth person I see, has experienced some form of sexual violence and will continue to, _unless_ I fight it, _them_ _,’_ I finish, never more certain of anything in my life. 

‘And your mate?’ this one insidious sentence freezes my nerves. 

‘Are you threatening my friends?’ I retort, non-committal. 

‘You realise you aren’t the first to try, right? The first Omega to try to overthrow the Alpha Alpha’s?’ _What?_ ‘This is why I asked Abbie to use the ancient rotary phone; to prevent network tapping,’ Lena changes the subject so abruptly, my teeth ache. _Out with it_ _,_ _Goddamnit_ _!_ ‘You grandmother wasn’t killed by opportunists. She was systematically groomed, imprisoned, tortured and eventually murdered by the upper echelons, when it became clear she wouldn’t be silenced.’ _No!_ Agonising clarity rips thru me as I furiously pace as far as the cord will allow. ‘Your mother didn’t kill herself....’ _No, no, no, God no!_  

 _‘_ _Stop_ _!_ _’_ I snarl, _knowing_.  

‘The newspapers aided their cause but also made them living, breathing targets.' _Oh_ _Jesus_ _!_ I suddenly double over, desperately trying to catch my breath; my lungs burning painfully, my mouth suddenly acidic and bitter tasting. ‘You are now _that_ target, Alexandra. You have been since the moment you woke up and decided to fight.’ I drop the receiver, hating the entire world and its sister planets. _Liz..._ _the strays..._ _my step-father... my brother... my teachers... doctors..._ _the_ _other_ _faceless bastards_ _.._ _!_ I angrily swipe at the lone tear that trails down my cheek. _Being tied down_ _..._ _unable to escape_ _those_ _three fucking_ _..._ _monsters_ _..._ _caused this_ _whole_ _clusterfuck_ _of_ _a situation_ _to ruin_ _me_ _..._ _my Olivia_ _..._ _Olivia!_ I forget Petrovsky, the call, everything besides my Alpha. _They’re killing her_ _,_ I realise with _every_ fibre in my adrenaline fuelled being. _They killed my grandmother_ _, my... mother_ _..._ guilt crushes me at how long and how aggressively I hated her... _and now my Olivia._  

I run back to the hidden cell, goose pimples rippling the entire length of my body on spying Cragen at the door. He holds something up in his hand, proudly. ‘I found it!’ _The master key!_ I nod silently, not wanting the thugs to know we’re about to rumble them. 

I gesture with my hands for him to hurry. A satisfying click sounds the breaking down of this once impenetrable barrier. I tear it open before they can barricade... _with what, I don’t know._ Cragen, Omi and their raised guns forgotten as I move innately, kicking the nearest thug in the abdomen so forcefully, he slams into the opposing wall. His accomplice charges me then thinks better of it, sensing my higher status, my fury, my strength and skill. He lifts his hands, in surrender. Omi moves to cuff him. Smelling his lower status, the thug suddenly grapples with him.  

‘Stop, you..!’ Cragen yells as the two men continue to fight each other; neither hearing him.  

‘Stop! Right _now!’_ I howl, causing both to freeze. My attention on them, shock pummels me as I feel an arm close around my neck.  

‘Fuck!’ the Captain voices uselessly, as the other thug restarts fighting Omi. 

I bite into the arm trying to strangle me, before kneeing him squarely in the crotch. He falls as predicted. ‘Cuff him!’ I order Cragen as I step into the fray. I grab the second thug and throw him against the adjoining wall, knocking him out cold. I quickly check in with Omi. He nods, breathless but otherwise unscathed, before I race to the silent, unmoving buddle in the cell corner. _Liv!_  

‘Liv?’ I whisper vehemently, not wanting to turn her and cause further damage. I take in her bloodied face, her shallow breaths, her unconscious, but thankfully clothed, form. _Omi... Kate!_  

Omi immediately grasps for his phone as Cragen kneels beside me. ‘Jesus, Liv. You call this a licking? I’d get more of a hiding from my mum after stealing a jar of pickles!’ he jokes, though his eyes tell me he's hurting.  

 _My love, I’m here._ _I’m here_ _,_ I sooth as I thread my fingers thru her tussled, brown locks. _Kate’s on her way, not long now_ _,_ I reassure her silently; Cragen looking at me oddly for not voicing a word.  

‘Leave ‘em be, Dad,’ Omi suggests.  

‘Can I help... in any way?’ the unknown pokes her head thru the door.  

I don’t know why this woman won’t quit. ‘Why are you here... er...?’ 

‘Abbie,’ she supplies, helpfully. ‘Judge Petrovsky told me to come, to help you.’ It’s only then I notice the Texan twang. ‘And...’ she stutters when I continue to run my fingers thru my injured life-partners hair ‘... because I think you’re the best thing since the Texan Trinity.’  


	20. Fresh Air

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex has to make a decision.  
> How hurt is Olivia?  
> Abbie leaves an impression.

I stare at the interloper in our inner sanctum. Abbie notices the suspicious glint in my eyes. ‘That wasn’t a come on…’ she stammers, suddenly realising how her words could be misconstrued.  

My mind is too scrambled beyond knowing one truth: _I like her_ _._ I don’t have the time to properly assess her.  

 _W_ _orked with her before No_ _-twat.._ _._ I love Omi’s relatively new nickname for Casey. _Seemed_ _tight and_ _able to handle her shit_ _._    

My full attention returns to Olivia; my struggling life-partner. My fingers still absentmindedly thread thru her chestnut locks; my heart conflicted and warring between animal rage and carnal desire. _Stop! Breathe!_ I try to self-sooth. _They killed…_ I shut my eyes in a futile effort to silence the thunder in my head; the turmoil and despair coursing thru my body as we wait for Kate to arrive, to help my love. 

‘I find touching the ground, or floor, a good way to unfreeze…’ Abbie suggests as I open my eyes to stare at the unknown quantity once more. _Can you read my mind?_ I test, searching her dark orbs for any sign of recognition. Finding nothing but cautious intrigue and awe, I realise she has disclosed to me with one simple suggestion. _You’re a survivor too…_ _Touch the floor_ _._ Already sat on the hard ground next to my Alpha, I reach down and allow the cool floor to slowly unfreeze my veins. 

I glance at Omi. _I need you to stay with Olivia…_  

 _But Kate…_  

 _You have the gun!_ I counter to shut down further argument.  

 _Where are you_ _gonna_ _be_ _?_ Omi asks, worry clear in his thoughts; his external expression remaining resolutely blank.  

 _Tell_ _Cragen_ _to call a conference_ _, here,_ _under the guise_ _of information gathering for_ _one of SVU’s current cases._ _Then you_ _contact Tony Mill…_  

 _The New York Times Reporter_ _that_ _sat in_ _on your trial?_  

 _Yes. His articles_ _have_ _always_ _been_ _neutral to favourable. They continue to be_ _…_ I shake my head, remembering there’s no time. _Use the rotary phone to suggest a meet at the Supreme Court_ _h_ _ouse._  

 _You’re going to see that Judge..?_  

 _Yes._  

 _You’re also fooling the Captain…_ Omi registers, his eyes suddenly burning into the top of my scalp. 

 _I know_ _,_ I admit, keenly aware I’m using Cragen as a diversion. _This is too important_ _,_ _Omi,_ I finally meet his gaze; my eyes having been focused on my Alpha throughout much of our exchange.

 _What_ _do_ _I tell the Cap?_  

 _Whatever It takes to ensure a conference is_ _convened_ _, as quickly as possible,_ I state dominantly. _Are we clear?_  

 _Yeah, Meg. I got you._ I know with every fibre of my being that he has. 

At this moment, Kate rushes thru the cell door, hurrying past Omi, Abbie and Cragen to kneel in front of Olivia. She peruses me very subtly. _I’m_ _unhurt. Concentrate on our Alpha_ _,_ I answer her unspoken question. Kate instantly submits, her stethoscope already at Olivia’s chest.  

‘How long has she been unconscious?’ she queries, ignoring the two comatose men in the decidedly crowded cell.  

‘At least twenty minutes,’ I answer warily, my mind utterly overwhelmed by the idea of losing my… _No! Stop!_  

‘She needs to go to a hospital, Alex,’ Kate suggests firmly, looking to me, her pack leader, as though I may object. 

 _You know where to take her…_ Kate and Omi nod their heads in unison, causing both Cragen and Abbie to frown slightly; acutely aware they are missing something. ‘Take her,’ I supply to ease their curiosity. The Captain disappears briefly to source a prisoner gurney.  

I kiss my heroine’s forehead, eyelids and nose. _I love you. You’re safe. Kate and Omi are here_ _to_ _take care of you._ _And before you worry, I just beat the_ _shit_ _out of two heavies. I can handle myself and_ _we_ _know what I have to do. Just concentrate on you and your recovery. I will be with you as soon as I can, my Alpha._ I brush her sloping fringe from her stunning face, as my heart begins to break at the thought of leaving her so vulnerable. _Oh, how the balance has changed,_ I note wryly, never feeling more conflicted in my life.  

‘Search those assholes for phones, then lock them in here until I say otherwise,’ I order, finally moving away from my love to stand.  

Cragen gives me a sharp look. ‘I don’t think that’s…’ I give him my most icy glare. ‘Okay, Miss Cabot. Okay,’ he submits, his hands raised in open defeat.  

I notice several bodies shiver as my skin omits further endorphins, igniting their urges. I swallow, knowing I’m safe with my pack, though my nerves still convulse with every wave of arousal that hits my senses. _Breathe, Cabot._  

I glance towards Abbie. The woman continues to surprise me. Her eyes are not on me. Instead, she is watching Kate work on Olivia. _Get a grip, ego!_ I clear my throat to gain her attention. She takes the cue and follows me out the cell door. _Omi?_  

 _Meg?_  

 _Look after my reason for living._  

 _..._ _‘til my last breath._  

 _You are part of that reason…_  

 

 

The fiery Texan didn't take kindly to me driving her car to the Supreme Courthouse. But, she relented, utterly aware she has met an equally fiery, and more dominant, Texan in me.  

After an awkwardly silent journey, Abbie eventually spits out what’s on her mind. ‘I can’t _believe_ I’m in a car with _the_ Alexandra Cabot!!’ I turn to stare at her, aghast. ‘You’re the _only_ person brave enough to take them on…’ she explains further as my mind drifts to places I already hate. _I’m not the first…_ I clench my jaw to stop myself wincing from the internal agony. ‘Who’s ‘them’?’ I ask, to escape my own mind.  

‘Everyone without a conscience,’ she answers, keeping her gaze steadily on mine; before I remember to look back at the road. ‘You have no idea of the revolutionary undercurrent you have started,’ Abbie whispers passionately as I try to keep my overwhelmed psyche from freefalling.  

‘Let’s take one step at a time, shall we,’ I say to stunt her fangirling. I’ve had enough persistent admirers over the years to know this one isn’t sexually motivated. _Thank fuck!_   

‘Okay, don’t wanna talk about it?’ Abbie gets the hint. ‘And I’m assuming you don’t wanna talk about anything that’s just happened… so… how about tell me about that red head who…’ I shock myself when a laugh bubbles up from my abdomen and voices itself before I can silence it. What’s worse is I don’t _want_ to gag it. _My_ _Alpha_ _is currently unconscious, beaten to within an inch of her life and I could be driving to my eventual, tortured death_ _._ But I’m laughing. It feels _too_ good to stop; to have a lighter moment in the heinous hell that is my life. I laugh heartily for a good five minutes, my body releasing years of contained mirth in an almost hysterical fashion; to the point Abbie reaches for the wheel. I immediately take back control. 

‘It wasn’t _that_ funny!’ she stresses deadpan, making me erupt once more. _‘_ _Christ_ _!_ You need to laugh more!’ 

‘And you need… to learn… the… art of sub… tlety,’ I finally stammer out, between heaves. I take a moment to dry my eyes and regain control of my frayed nerves, taking deep, lung-busting breaths. _I’m not a total idiot._ I know my emotions are currently all over the place. I clear my throat once I trust myself to speak with some semblance of normality. ‘You don’t know how wonderful it sounds to have someone say they fancy someone else. To not be the object of…’ 

‘Whoa…’ Abbie interrupts, her hand hanging in mid-air. _‘Trust_ me, if you were single and interested…’ This one sentence alone tells me so much about Abbie’s understanding of conscience, morality and consent. ‘… I’d be jumping your bones right about now…’ I gaze at her for a beat before dissolving into further, uncontrollable fits of laughter. _Nope_ _. N_ _o subtlety whatsoever_. ‘Watch the road, Bignuts,’ Abbie states sharply, causing me to do _exactly_ that. 

I breathe shakily, gripping the steering wheel to stop my body being wracked with further low, rumbling chuckles. ‘Bignuts?’ I raise an eyebrow challengingly. 

Abbie meets my challenge. ‘You got anything better, darlin’?’ My heart skips a beat upon hearing the endearment my mother used to… _Don’t!_ _Breathe._ _Mama…_  

‘Less of the darlin’, more of the Bignuts…’ I compromise, trying to stem my tears as we fall silent at the sight of the Supreme Courthouse. _Fuck!_ my mind suddenly screams as reality and dawning hit me full force _. I’m really doing this!_ Fear begins to snake into my very soul; my lungs immediately wheeze against the anxiety spreading thru my veins. I take some steadying breaths, hoping I won’t panic in front of this near stranger.  

‘Take your time, Bignuts. I’m here for you.’ Abbie's words seep into my heart, soothing my nerves and quietening my rioting adrenaline.  

‘Okay, enough of the Bignuts,’ I whisper forcefully, my hand levering the door open before I lose my nerve.  

‘Whatever you say, Alex,’ Abbie appeases, following my lead by exiting the passenger side.  


	21. Case Closed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex has to face several demons.

Both women enter the back of the building unnoticed; with every camera person and news reporter blindly racing to their vehicles. _Yes,_ _Don_ _!_   

The Supreme Courthouse is eerily quiet as we race as casually as we can, to Lena's office. _Court must be in session_ _._ The few people who are present, stop what they’re doing to stare at me. _This was a stupid idea!_ my mind plays devil's advocate as mind-numbing fear of this rushed plan being ‘outed’, hangs like a lead weight on my chest; my struggling lungs buckling under the weight.  

‘Go about your business. You didn’t see me,’ I suddenly find myself saying; struck by the observers immediate acquiesce, continuing with whatever task they were doing.  

Abbie looks at me with unabashed awe. ‘Now _that’s_ dominance,’ the raven-haired Beta drawls evenly.  

I look at her, still shocked by my own words and their potential power. ‘Do you _really_ think that’ll work?’ 

‘If that had been directed my way, I’d be down on my knees waiting for your next bidding,’ she answers honestly, as I turn back to the people I’ve just instructed. 

‘They’re not kneeling,’ I note seriously but Abbie’s slight chuckle brings me back. 

‘Not literally, Big... Alex,’ Abbie quickly corrects herself.  

I eye her sadly. _If it’s that easy to dominate those lower in the hierarchy, is it any wonder_ _there_ _haven’t be_ _e_ _n any global uprisings?_ _We_ _have been_ _bred and_ _conditioned to submit_ _;_ _ordered to_ _submi_ _t,_ I realise, _hating_ this world more than ever, as I glance at an oblivious Abbie. _No wonder Kate was so silent, so alone, in our pack._ _Fucking Donnelly._ _No wonder my mother and grandmother were_ _hushed_ _._ Another thought strikes me as Abbie continues to look at me blankly: _But why are Pure Blood Omega's_ _,_ _(_ _the lowest, weakest_ _,_ _most vulnerable status_ _of all_ _)_ _,_ _also most able to cause a noticeable_ _enough_ _uprising to_ _make national_ _headlines?_  

We reach Lena's door unimpeded. The people I just instructed, still seemingly going about their business.  

A final heinous thought violates my mind: _can Omega's and other survivors be ordered to forget their abuse?_ I swallow harshly; my skin crawling at this new, nauseating possibility. _Is this why moral outrage hasn’t_ _overthrown_ _the Alpha Alphas_ _?_ I ask myself, coining Lena's earlier phrase.  

I enter her chambers without knocking, wanting to catch the judge off-guard; not trusting her intentions.  

Petrovsky looks up from her desk, a pride and warmth in her eyes; taking in my features as though I might disappear. ‘You’re here,’ she whispers, astonished that I’m truly present. I’ve worked with Lena twice before, during my law training. She always _appeared_ to be moral and respectful. _Stay cautious, Ca_ _b_ _ot._  

I approach her desk as Abbie shuts the door behind us. ‘I need the sentencing done, now,’ I insist, surprising Lena with my chosen order of business. _She expected me to drill her about my mother and grandmother. Not here, within the very walls of societal corruption and greed._   

‘Well, it’s a good thing the three animals, and Langan, are already here then, isnt it?’ I feel may face drain of colour. 

‘What?’ 

‘I gave you 24hours. They’ve been here ever since, waiting,’ Petrovsky explains, immediately dampening my anxiety.  

‘Let’s...’ I start toward the door. 

‘Not so fast, Alexandra,’ Petrovsky states hurried. I turn back to her, my chest heaving in frustration. ‘The press is...’ 

‘... taken care of,’ I finish her sentence; a curious expression crossing her features. ‘Now let’s get started. Closed court? Yes?’ I half-ask, knowing everyone is either in session or hot-wheeling it to the precinct. My heart still hammers at the chances of this going wrong. ‘I’m assuming Trevor doesn’t know I’m...’ 

‘Unless someone’s tailing you, no one knows,’ Lena reassures me as she gestures to Abbie, who moves to leave the room. 

My anxiety instantly spikes. ‘Where are you going?’ I question, my innate suspicion of everyone, the only thing keeping me alive.  

Abbie about turns. ‘To call Langan,’ she replies, understanding. ‘I can do it here instead, if you’d like?’ I inhale a shaky breath, nodding my head once. _Thank you._  

‘Use this one...’ Lena suggests, retrieving a rotary phone from her desk draw.  

I step closer to them, to ensure I hear every word. Petrovsky sniffs the air sharply. I snap my head up in alarm. ‘Lena?’ 

‘You’ve... You've... You don’t smell like you...’ she states bluntly as Abbie starts dialling. I place a finger at my lips to silence the shocked judge as my fellow Texan calls for the sentencing hearing to begin, ten minutes from now.  

After Abbie replaces the receiver, she gives us a cheesy thumbs up, which I ignore. Lena is staring at me, mesmerised.  

‘I thought you were a maniac to attend _here,_ alone. But now I... you... you've transitioned?!’ she finally voices; her face creasing into a genuine smile of pure joy. ‘This means... do you _know_ what this means?’ the judge stresses, her mind seemingly in overdrive at the possibilities. 

‘What does it mean to _you,_ Lena?’ I ask, my meaning absolutely clear. _Will you use it against me?_ _Will you inform_ _Donnelly?_  

‘It means this hellhole of a world can be moral, just and hold a conscience again!’ Petrovsky responds excitedly. ‘Liz _won’t_ like this!’ she adds, near clapping her hands with glee.  

My heart ricochets against my ribcage in sheer panic. ‘You won’t...’ 

‘If you knew anything about me, you would know I loathe the _heathen_ with an overwhelming passion, Alexandra.’ I stare at this alleged ally. _Appearance_ _s_ _can be deceptive. Donnelly herself, continued to teach a lesson_ _I_ _began learning_ _from the age of 11._ I inhale sharply, not wanting to lead myself down a rabbit hole I can't escape. _Breathe, Alex._ ‘An evil, conniving, little bitch. She won’t be hearing _anything_ from us,’ Lena states evenly. ‘But as soon as this is over, you _have_ to get back in...’ 

‘Yes, Alex...’ 

‘No!’ I howl before I can check my volume. The force of my voice stuns both of them into silence. Both women shudder as my fury surrounds them. My message is clear: _This Pure Blood won’t be_ _silenced_ _anymore. D_ _on’t try to stop me._ ‘Follow my lead.’ They heal obligingly.  

 

Lena heads for her official entrance as Abbie and I stalk into the Supreme Courtroom. Adrenaline instantly pummels my veins as I notice Trevor and all three strays sat at the defendant’s bench. In my empowerment haze, I’d neglected to remember I will be required to face my rapists one final time.  

I walk to the prosecution desk; Abbie unknowingly sitting in my Alpha's chair, behind me. I turn to her quickly. ‘Not there.’ She moves at once. 

I inhale, counting to four, then exhale, counting to eight, in an effort to expand my seizing lungs and quieten my raging heart. _Breathe_ _Cabot_ _,_ I self-soothe, my every muscle urging me to turn in search of my mate. _Olivia..._ _Don’t_ _!_ _You’re in court... for_ _sentencing. Do. Your. Job!_ My muscles relax slightly. _Self-domination?_ _Okay._  

I feel several pairs of eyes on me. _Don’t look at them_ _._ I keep my orbs facing forward, not wanting the strays to read my new, somewhat improved, hierarchical status. Still, my skin crawls as their eyes ravage me. I swallow thickly, stealing myself for the next few minutes; knowing there is no viable way I should lose. _But, given my life thu_ _s far, those hell-bent on malice always find a way._  

Finally, Petrovsky makes an appearance, without being announced. Its then I notice there are no stewards, no typist, no media. _Is this legal?_ I wonder, desperate to ensure these animals _aren’t_ freed on a technicality.  

‘We need a dictation typist,’ I stand and voice before Lena has the chance to speak. She looks at me evenly, her message clear: _in this courtroom, I’m_ _Q_ _ueen_ _._ _Fuck._  

Without a word, Abbie walks over to the type machine. ‘I’m qualified to use this,’ she states, to deflect any objections from the defence bench. None come. _I like her better still_ _,_ I acknowledge, for the first time, truly thankful I’ve met Abbie... _I need to find out her surname_. _Not important_ _right now_ _, Cabot!_ I chastise, to redirect my focus. I take a steadying breath when I notice one of the strays turn his attention from me to Abbie. _Don’t, you fucking mongrel!_ I silence a growl before it becomes audible, as I feel her dark eyes on me; her expression conveying her utter awareness of what is happening. _I’m here._ _You’re_ _safe..._ I comfort her silently, realising I’m mirroring my life-partners reassurances. I bite my lip to control my emotional turbulence.  

‘Today, I, Right Honourable Lena Marion Petrovsky, am presiding over this sentencing hearing for the following case: Alexandra Cabot vs Bob Ashton, Joel Ashton and Ray Daniels. All defendants were found guilty of all charges,’ Lena states evenly, conveying none of her inner pleasure at voicing the words. ‘Defendants Bob Ashton, Joel Ashton and Ray Daniels, please rise.’ They do as asked. ‘In all my years as an officer of the court, I have _never_ been privy to such atrocities committed against one, singular victim. The evil with which you, Mr and Master Ashton, planned to tie down, spread-eagle, strip and savagely beat, rape and torture the victim, Miss Cabot, defies belief.’ I stupidly close my eyes, hoping to shut-down all sensory faculties. But I only succeed in taking myself back to _that_ night, _that_ park, the cold, the ropes, the stench, the fists, the thrusts, the agony. _No mercy._ I jolt my eyes open, praying I haven’t screamed or drawn attention to my abject terror. _Lena is still_ _talking_ _. All eyes are on her._ _Calm the hell down_ _!_  

‘... the absolute callousness of Mr Daniels, to repeatedly rape, beat, burn and stab an already terrorized victim. Your cruelty cannot be measured...’ 

‘That was the point, lady,’ the stray nauseatingly agrees, wearing his sickness like a badge of honour. 

‘One more word from you and you'll get the death penalty!’ Petrovsky seethes as I try to still my trembling limbs, my rioting heart, my rebelling stomach. _Don’t give them the_ _satisfaction_ _. Fall apart afterwards_ _;_ _af_ _ter_ _meeting with_ _Tony Mill._  

I watch as Trevor stands to defend his client. ‘The death penalty isn’t a possible sentence for the charges brought before you,’ he states defensively, taking Lena literally, just to have his words on the record; a record that may be worth a lot of money by morning.  

‘Sit down, Counsellor and _control_ your clients. Enough boundaries were overstepped during the trial.’ Only then does it hit me that numerous slurs, inappropriate behaviours and direct assaults occurred, in this _very_ room, under the supposed watchful and protective eye of one Judge Elizabeth Donnelly. _She got off on every second of it!_ A new wave of nausea envelops me. _Don’t vomit here_ _..._ _please._ I swallow again. 

‘Master Joel Ashton, being 16 years of age, you have been tried as an adult. Due to the seriousness of the crimes you have been found guilty of committing, you will be sentenced to the maximum on all counts. Meaning, for count one: predatory sexual assault, I order you serve the maximum 25-year sentence. For the count of aggravated sexual assault in the first degree, I order you to serve the maximum 25-year sentence. For the count of aggravated assault, you are hereby ordered to serve the full 15-year sentence. And finally, on the count of false imprisonment, I order you to serve the maximum 3-year sentence. All sentences are to run concurrently and you will _not_ be eligible for parole until such time you are no longer deemed a risk to society.’ _So, never,_ my mind cheers exuberantly whilst my external facade remains stoically detached. _Don’t give them an inch._  

Two further rounds of this later, Lena focuses her most disapproving glare on Bob Ashton and Ray Daniels. ‘You, sirs, are predators. You will _never_ be eligible for parole and you will serve your sentences in the general population at Sing Sing.’  

An audible gasp splits the courtroom. ‘What?’ hollers stray Daniels. ‘I was promised solitary...’ 

‘Convicted felons aren’t offered such promises. You relinquished your right to favours as soon as you committed these heinous crimes. You will live amongst fellow custodians until the day you die,’ Petrovsky states in ominous conclusion.  

‘Do you have anything you would like to say, Miss Cabot?’ she offers, surprising me. Our eyes meet for mere seconds before I rise from the prosecution bench.   

I know everyone is expecting me to talk, but I _won’t_ give these weak specimens the satisfaction. Instead, I turn to them and smile broadly. Not a sound. Just one simple, yet powerful gesture. _You_ _haven’t b_ _eaten me._ _Try to masturbate to that, fuckers!_ I then nod a thanks to Lena before sitting back down for the final paragraph of closure in this heinous chapter of my life. 

Four stewards suddenly materialise from the door leading to the cells. I glance at Petrovsky in alarm. She nods her head once, reading my anxiety. _I trust these men not to disclose your location_. This one gesture does little to steady my nerves, _but I won’t let it ruin this moment... my moment. The moment I should be sharing with my Alpha..._  

I watch as they are led away in shackles; Ray Daniels glaring at me with cataclysmic fury. My parting gift: the unwanted knowledge, he has _not_ broken me.  

 _Who ’s the bitch now, Daddy? _ 


	22. Video Conference Call

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will Alex have enough time to share her message?

As soon as the last hair on the strays head is hidden by the door, I stand to leave. 

‘This sentencing hearing is concluded,’ Lena mutters thoughtfully, knowing I won't be stopped; Abbie quickly catching up with me once she's typed Petrovsky’s last word. 

‘Alex?’ I hear Trevor call as I burst thru the Supreme Courtroom doors, relieved to find the wide corridors deserted. _There's still time_ , I surmise. 

 _Abbie..._ Remembering she can’t hear me, I open my mouth. ‘Abbie, I need you to call George Huang, to get a...’ 

‘George Huang? As in _the_ Dr George Huang who is the psyche behind the hierarchy study?’ The raven haired Beta asks, wide-eyed, surprising me. _Finally,_ _George! It’s working_ _,_ my mind quietly celebrates. 

‘Yes,’ I answer hurriedly, wanting to get back to my point; not knowing how much time we have before they come for me. ‘I need you to call him and ask that he sends his video to Captain Cragen’s work email. It’s more confidential that way,’ I explain unnecessarily. ‘I need you to check he has the projector ready, and to contact Cragen directly, with our next move,’ I finally voice specifics. Abbie looks at me with a wry smile, unmoving. _‘Now,_ Abbie,’ I order, when the Beta doesn’t move. My words are enough to motivate her into action. She nods before heading back to Petrovsky's office, to the rotary phone.  

I make a beeline for the out of order jury room, towards the back of the building. _No one knows_ _exactly_ _where I am_ _,_ I think, fearful. _If_ _I’ve_ _read Tony Mills wrong,_ _this really is over._  

Whilst my thoughts rebel against me, I push the door open a crack, my eyes taking in as much of the room as possible, before I step inside, the lock clicking shut behind me. 

 

The Precinct: 45 minutes later (third person, from the press conference rooms POV) 

‘What are we doing here Captain? ‘Don is asked for the hundredth time, the press fast losing their patience, thinking something ground-breaking was going to tempt their vulturous taste-buds.  

‘Just give me a few more minutes. It’ll be worth your while,’ Cragen tries to appeases them; finally grasping what Miss Cabot is attempting to do, after receiving George Huang’s emailed video. He's secretly furious at the case victim for putting him in this position. _Gotta_ _admire her though,_ Cragen allows, _knowing_ every last grain of his salt is being tested. _Maybe, after this,_ _she will trust me enough to_ _be part of the_ _pa_ _c_ _k?_ he wonders, hopefully.   

Alex’s video email _eventually_ comes thru. ‘People, I just need to check the set up of the projector, then we're in business.’ He ignores the disgruntled murmurs of disbelief, having already used numerous, similar time-wasting excuses, for the past hour. Only when the projector finally comes to life does the room still, an eerie silence falling over the hundred members of the world’s press in attendance. Cragen starts Alex's video message as film crews, reporters and editors watch on with baited breath.  

The breath-taking sight of Alexandra Cabot fills the projector screen. Several vultures moan in open appreciation. 

‘Good afternoon,’ Alex welcomes, her manners impeccable, even in hurried crisis. ‘I need you to listen to several important facts I am about to...’ If only she knew how captivated her audience was. ‘... ter this video, there is a second video in order for you to gain an absolute understanding,’ her eyes pierce the camera, stirring the coldest of souls. ‘These facts will be the story of your careers but you’ll have to bare with me,’ Alex steals herself, her shoulders squaring slightly.  

‘Okay, fact number one...’ she takes a steadying breath. ‘... I am no longer a Pure Blood Omega. Most of you will know what this status is; if you have followed my case and/or watched _t_ _he_ YouTube video. That YouTube video now has over 9 billion views, so please don’t feign ignorance of what I am about to share. But if you truly are out of the loop, you’re probably a Beta. The second video will go into more detail regarding status.’ 

‘I’m here to speak to and on behalf of Omegas.’ A pin could drop in the conference room. ‘You know what my case was about; what happened to Detective Olivia Benson and I, outside this _very_ Precinct. I won't share unnecessary details. But would you like the touching, groping, forcible kissing, the rapes to stop?’ Alex asks the heinous question, her words solely for _her_ people. ‘You _can_ stop them. You can live a life _without_ being forced to suffer an alien tongue, hand, finger or penis against you, _inside_ you, ever again.’ Several gasps sound from the transfixed media. ‘Find another Omega, a _willing_ Omega, and breed. By doing this, one of you, the more dominant, will succeed in rising up the hierarchy, to become what is coined an ‘Alpha Alpha’ or Super Alpha; the _second_ highest status there is.’ Cragen knows how much satisfaction Alex is getting from voicing this one sentence.  

‘It is not yet known if the other participating Omega can also become an Alpha, by dominating another Omega.’ Alex pauses before staring straight into the camera. ‘When I mention dominating, I stress this _must_ be consensual, or the transition will not succeed. _Don’t_ become what you are trying to escape,’ her voice almost breaks. ‘I would recommend dominating your willing partner thru mental and physical penetration, to ensure best results,’ she clarifies, providing her people with their best chance of success.  

Alex moves on quickly. ‘You can then become the second highest status. The highest status can only be achieved by transitioned Pure Blood Omegas. Having been thru the worst abuse known to mankind, it seems the fates have given us the trump card of leap-frogging the masses: by transitioning to Pure Blood Alphas. You can gain this status by mating with an Omega. I’d suggest the willing Omega be tied down to ensure the Pure Blood remains dominant. Then once the Omega is exhausted, dominate them without their bounds,’ Alex explains in detail, wanting the worlds Omega’s to succeed in rescuing themselves. 

‘This will be dangerous for you. Not all of you will transition. Many of you will be hurt, possibly even killed. I will do all I can to help protect you. I know what you’ve been thru. You know what I’ve been thru. You’re _not_ alone,’ a softness creeps into Alex’s tone. 

‘And a word to all you _sick_ Alpha Alphas...’ her acidic stare almost breaks the camera. ‘I  _see_ you. You _will_ submit, or you’ll be forced to, perhaps for the first time in your disturbed lives,’ Alex pauses before she rants into oblivion. She bites her lip to give herself a moment. 

‘Omega’s, take back the rights torn from you. But remind yourselves, you’re better than them. Don’t allow their sickness to seep into you. You’re good, decent, moral people.’ Alex blinks her eyes to clear her momentarily blurred vision. _It’s said._ _It’s out._ _It’s done._  

‘My next fact is regarding Detective Olivia Benson. Most of you will know she is currently under arrest for the attempted murder of Judge Elizabeth Donnelly.’ Alex overtly grinds her teeth before her ice-mask reappears. ‘Detective Benson did grievously assault Judge Donnelly. This is an absolute fact,’ Alex discloses honestly, without pause. ‘Detective Benson assaulted her because Judge Donnelly was grooming and preparing to rape me.’ Renewed gasps sound thru the room. ‘I _know_ this because Detective Benson was able to record the following conversation, after finding Judge Donnelly on top of me.’ Alex proceeds to fumble with a voice recorder. 

 _‘Why were you on top_ _of_ _my Omega,_ _Liz?’_ Outing their relationship is no longer an issue. The case is closed.  

 _‘_ _... I wanted to test my scent on Alex_ _...’_  

Alex plays the entire recording, allowing the worlds media to hear Donnelly implicate herself in the planned grooming and sexual abuse of Alex Cabot. The recording further implicates Donnelly in the second ‘Hell’ and its consequences; after she stalled aide that would have saved Olivia from being almost stabbed to death; saved Fin from being violently assaulted and saved Alex from nearly being raped to death. Her heart attack remains unshared with the press; her one vulnerability. Donnelly knowing this truth, is the packs core weakness   

Alex turns the recording off and looks into the camera once more. ‘Judge Donnelly is a dangerous wolf in sheep's clothing,’ she says diplomatically. ‘I wish to formally accuse her of knowingly stalling aide which resulted in the attempted murder of a police detective, namely Olivia Benson; the gang rape and attempted murder of another detective, namely Odafin Tutuola and the attempted rape and murder of an officer of the court, Alexandra Cabot,’ she inhales a calming breath. _This is happening._ ‘I wish to further accuse Judge Elizabeth Donnelly of attempted/possible murder...’ Alex swallows thickly, her thoughts entirely with her Alpha. ‘... the potential murder of Detective Olivia Benson, whilst she was in custody, at 9:34 this morning.’ _Please_ _don’_ _t_ _actually be true_ _,_ Alex begs, using murder to shelter her Alpha from further attempts, _if_ Olivia has actually survived her beating. _My love._  

Alex looks down at her hands, hidden from view, as she tries to harness her overwhelming need to be with her mate. _Finish this, Cabot._ She raises her iridescent cloudy blues to the camera. 

‘Finally, after several months of recovery, my case versus Bob Ashton, Joel Ashton and Ray Daniel’s is now complete. All three... defendants have been handed down the _full_ sentences on _all_ charges.’ Alex looks directly into the camera, into every Omega's soul. ‘See, we Omega’s _can_ fight _and_ succeed in gaining our freedom, _i_ _f_ we _want_ it enough. If a lowly Pure Blood Omega can win a case in the Supreme Courthouse and successfully transition to Pure Blood Alpha, just _imagi_ _ne_ what you’re capable of. So _do_ it!’ Alex concludes passionately. ‘Over to Dr George Huang...’ Alexandra Cabot's image disappears moments before George fills the screen. 

‘I’m Dr George Huang and I am currently conducting a study into the hierarchical injustices befalling Non-Alphas...’ 


	23. Permanence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Can Alex get to her Alpha?
> 
> Thank you so much for helping DD:R reach 100 kudos ❤

As soon as Tony turns the camera off, I stand and brush myself down, feeling grubby from sitting on the bathroom floor. One of my not so pristine ideas, to avoid unnecessary attention by carrying chairs into an out-of-order restroom. 

Tony then switches his phone video off before looking at me. ‘I’ve gotta ask, why _this_ _...’_ he taps his cell. ‘...if you’ve just broadcasted that?’ he points to his camera set up.  

I smile slightly in recognition that the reporter has no _real_ idea how dangerous and calculated Elizabeth Donnelly is; even following my recent disclosures. _No one can, until_ _you’re_ _underneath_ _her_ _, thinking_ _she has your best interests at_ _heart. Eve_ _n when she’s touching you._ I swallow hard, shaking my head to rid the disgusting thought. ‘I need you to share the phone video to YouTube, to all big international networks and anywhere else you feel _will_ aide in spreading it like wildfire,’ I answer him, _knowing_ Donnelly and her powers of persuasion. I offer him my hand. Feeling another person’s skin willingly against mine is still alien. Though, I _kn_ _e_ _w_ Tony was utterly safe, from the moment he walked into the Supreme Courtroom. _Almost as gay as I am!_   

We shake hands, our eyes holding for several moments before I break both contacts. He nods his head, even though I can tell he doesn’t truly understand why.  

‘Donnelly will shut down the conference. She probably already has. If not, she’ll lock down the place and force every single reporter, camera person and editor to erase their tapes before mind fucking them to forget why they attended,’ I explain hurriedly, causing Mills to look at me in astonishment.  

‘You really are magnificent, aren’t you,’ he murmurs in awe.  

‘Can we have a picture together?’ I ask, feeling only slightly guilty at the ulterior motive. Tony jumps at the chance and ready's his phone. I purposely shake his hand and smile broadly, as his face near splits in two.  

‘Thanks,’ he says gleefully; possibly the _only_ person in existence to possess a photograph of me looking ‘happy’. _If only my soul wasn’t dying at the thought of my beaten Alpha._  

‘I need you to send our photo to these numbers,’ I request, as Tony's expression turns curious.  

‘This wasn’t about me getting a fan-girl selfie was it?’ dawning quickly occupies his features. 

‘Sorry, no. But you can keep it,’ I half-joke as I watch him, like a hawk, as he sends the picture to my numerous sources (the pack).  

‘Are you going to tell me..?’ he enquires further, ever the reporter.  

I smile sadly at him, once every photo has successfully sent. ‘It’s to let certain people know I’m okay. And to use as evidence of our alliance, _if_ you break my trust,’ I answer him truthfully. ‘It’s my one guarantee that you won’t,’ I whisper, ashamed that I have to use such tactics against a man who has and will continue to risk so much for a Pure Blood Alpha he barely knows. 'I’m sorry Tony,’ I say sincerely before I ask one final favour of him. ‘Now, I need your phone.’ I hold my hand out as he looks at me in surprise. 

‘What?’ he furrows his brow in confusion. ‘How will I share the video..? The picture...?’ 

I take a deep breath to steady myself; loathing that I have to remain suspicious of others motives, _even_ seemingly good people. ‘I will send you both, once you’ve bought a new cell, and called this number,’ I pass him a piece of paper. ‘I can't risk you being followed or killed, because of any association with me.’ 

‘Unless I turn against you. Then I’m fair game, right?’ Mills asks, his tone conveying understandable anger and hurt. 

I approach him. ‘I really am sorry Tony. I’m doing this to protect you. But also, to protect me and my pack. The last person I trusted with my life, groomed me and attempted to kill my Alpha, _twice_ _.’_ My explanation hits home. 

‘Okay, I’m sorry. I get it...’ he acquiesces, handing me his phone.  

‘Call this number and I’ll share them back. Okay?’ I ask, to ensure he understands. He nods his head once. ‘You have shown such bravely, or stupidity, coming here today,’ I note as Tony snorts. ‘Please be in touch as soon as you can. But it’s safer you don’t associate with me for now. _Es_ _pecially_ if my assumption that the conference has been compromised, is correct,’ I strenuously suggest, desperate for him to realise I’m trying to protect him. 

‘When did you clock that I'm an Omega?’ he asks astutely, utterly comprehending what I’m trying to do. _Thank Jesus!_  

‘When I shook your hand,’ I admit, my plan for him to share the video suddenly secondary. _I can do that_. ‘Remember what I said in the video. Go find another willing Omega and dominate them to oblivion.’ 

 

After hurriedly skirting thru the Supreme Courthouse to pick up Abbie, (mind-changing several witnesses on the way and _hating_ it because it’s a form of emotional rape), Petrovsky shows us a private exit via the Judges' secret passage. _Fucking Donnelly_ _._ _Another safety net she neglected to tell us about._ The wickedness of the woman defies comprehension.  

I’m still clenching my teeth as Abbie pushes me into the car. Before she reaches the other side, I’m already there. ‘I’m driving,’ I say sternly, not wanting anyone in control of where we’re going but me. Abbie is forced to run back to the passenger side. I step on the gas as soon as we’re out of the parking lot.  

‘Where we going, Alex?’ the Texan enquires as I take the fourth right turn in a row.  

‘I’m trying to decide whether I can trust you,’ I answer instead, my thoughts muddled and confused. _What if she’s another Donnelly? What if_ _you_ _plan to decimate the pack, my pack? What if..?_ _Fuck!_  

‘Alex,’ Abbie says carefully. ‘You are the most dominant status now, so your mind is un-fuck-able by a lowly, mangy Beta. I can’t brain-wash you into thinking I’m safe. You either know it, or you don’t,’ she rests her short, yet solid case. 

I bite my lip, mulling over her succinct argument. Following another right turn, I fish in my pocket for Mills' cell and hand it to her. ‘I need you to share...’ I search thru the device. ‘... share this video to YouTube,’ I instruct, my focus returning to the road. ‘Sign out of the current YouTube account and sign into ‘Anonymous Radical...’ 

‘The gang...’ Abbie immediately quietens, feeling my icy stare bore into her.  

‘Yes, the same account that uploaded the gang rape video,’ I allow, eyeing her frostily. ‘You’ve seen it?’  

‘Every person with Wi-Fi has watched it,’ she rebuttals not unjustly. 

‘Why did you decide to?’ I can’t help asking, loathing that this woman and nearly every other has seen me and my Alpha, in such a state of wretched terror. 

‘I read up on Dr George Huang’s study and wanted to learn more about this societal hierarchy. When he mentioned you in the bio, I attempted to research you and it was the first and, pretty much, _only_ thing that came up; besides the New York Times articles following your case,’ she looks at me guiltily. ‘I’m sorry.’ 

I turn back to the road but place my hand briefly on hers. _I must get used to skin contact other than... Olivia..._ I remove my hand and descend into thoughts of my Alpha. _Liv..._  

‘Alex?’ Abbie barks, fighting thru my haze until I’m blinking my eyes to concentrate on what I’m doing. _You’re driving, Alex. Fucking concentrate!_  

‘Sorry... umm... The password is _‘f_ _uckyoufuckers_ _’_ _._ No spacing and all lower case,’ I provide, feeling Abbie’s eyes on me again. Reading her mind, I explain myself: ‘We were able to break into that Underling Peter Jones’ YouTube account. There’s no way I’d use _that_ as a password... far too _obvious!’_ I quip as Abbie sniggers, punching it in. ‘Let me know when it’s done.’ 

A good ten minutes and 11 left turns later, Abbie finally informs me its complete. ‘What do you want to name it?’ 

I mull this over for several beats, leaning my head slightly side to side, as my eyes remain focused on the road. ‘A Pure Blood Omega’s Rebellion: a short film by Alexandra Cabot,’ I suggest, smiling to myself.  

Abbie titters beside me. ‘Have I told you lately how _badass_ you are?’ 

I can’t help but smile, before a thought strikes me, instantly evaporating my mirth. ‘Link it to the ‘Gang rape outside NYPD’ video. That’s sure to invite viewers,’ I suggest as the Texan types away. 

‘Allll..... done,’ she preens, tapping one last button before offloading the phone to me.  

I quickly peruse the page, the video, the link, before smashing the device against the dash board. 

 _‘Fuck!’_ Abbie grimaces, not expecting such violence in this enclosed space.  

‘Sorry,’ I apologise fleetingly. ‘Find the sim card and memory thing for me.’ Abbie sifts thru the mangled mess, finding both quickly. ‘Snap the sim card and stamp on the memory thing...’ 

‘It’s a hard-drive,’ Abbie corrects me. 

‘... the hard-drive!’ I parrot back as I brush the remanence from the dash board.  

Abbie passionately stamps on it, finally succeeding in crushing it after several fevered attempts.  

‘Chuck half the sim card out your window and give the other half to me. And start throwing the memory... the hard-drive pieces at intervals...’ 

‘Isn’t this a bit much?’ the Texan finally gives in to her inner voice. 

‘No,’ I reply determinedly. It’s all the encouragement Abbie needs to finish her sprinkling endeavour. 

 

Finally, I turn in the direction of _home_ _;_ hoping I’ve bored or confused any potential tailers, or lost them altogether. 

I breathe for the first time since before we left, earlier this morning. _Oh_ _,_ _how things have changed,_ I think darkly, having no cause for celebration, even though this day  _should_ be the defining momemt of my and every Omega’s existence. _No_ _celebrations_ _until I know_ _my Alpha is alive._ _If she’s..._ I halt my unproductive thoughts, knowing we're still at least 40 minutes out.  

 

We eventually turn into my single garage, the door clicking shut behind us. I jump out of the vehicle without even cutting the engine. I leave Abbie to sort it as I race up the stairs, two at a time. I reach the front door, fumbling with my keys in my haste.  

I run the last remaining yards until my eyes fall on the achingly battered form of my beautiful heroine. _My love._  

I hear strained breaths behind me. I turn to find Omi and Huang trying to catch their breath, their bodies doubled over in their quest.  

‘It’s best you stand in a Superman type pose than do that. G, you _know_ this,’ a voice to my right states frustratedly. _Kate_. 

Both men abruptly do as she suggests, succeeding in inhaling the required oxygen to inflate their starving lungs. 

Even though my heart sings at seeing them, I abruptly turn to my Alpha, and Kate. ‘How is she?’ I ask, quickly clasping one of Olivia’s hands in mine. _I’m here my love. I’m here._ My body yearns to touch her, to hold her, but I fear hurting or injuring her further. 

‘She’s stable, Alex. She’ll pull thru, but she’s currently sedated to aide healing,’ Kate says the crucial words I most need to hear. _My Alpha_ _IS_ _stable and_ _WILL_ _pull thru!_ I half-collapse into the ready chair next to Olivia’s bed, tears materialising as the prospect of losing her gives way to an earth-shattering relief so potent, I fear I’ll drown under the weight of it. 

I inhale several lung-busting breaths in an attempt to steady myself. _How_ _..._ _badly injured_ _..._ _is she?_  

 _It's appears they did quite a bit of posturing before they_ _started_ _beating her_ _,_ _because_ _Olivia has one broken finger_ _, a split lip_ _,_ _two black eyes_ _,_ _and_ _other_ _general_ _sprains and_ _bruising._  

 _That’s it?_ I query, utterly blindsided by this incredible news. I squeeze my Alpha’s hand harder; my other reaching to ruffle her gorgeous trellises.  

Kate stiffens for mere seconds but my entire world grinds to a halt. ‘What, Kate? Tell _me!’_  

The good doctor proceeds to roll Olivia on to her side. My heart constricts painfully; my imagination escalating to deafening proportions as she peals back my Alpha's shirt to reveal Olivia's lower back. 

A tally totalling 261 is crudely etched onto my heroine`s flesh. I raise my eyes to my Omega in alarm; my stomach instantly nauseated. _261 times..._

 _I tried to wash it off but_ _its permanent. They_ _tattooed_ _her,_ Kate explains, carefully watching my features. ‘Does it mean anything to you?’ 


	24. Indoctrination

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some epic vibes are felt amongst the bad.
> 
> For Chely99, artemiskitty and M <3.
> 
> Posted early as have a good feeling about this one, for once.

I desperately try to swallow the bile invading my mouth; my heart ricocheting in my chest, my lungs straining for oxygen as my entire body begins to shake with utter recognition and despair. _No..!_ I withdraw my touch from my life’s branded flesh as though I’ve been burned. _No!_ _He_ _couldn’t… 261…_ _The sick bastards!_ I near scream, my head in my hands as I turn away from my Alpha, my pack.  

I pace the room; my mind exploding with flashbacks, horrific muscle memories and skin-crawling humiliations. _Oh God no_ _._  

 _Meg?_ Omi voices in an effort to silence my rioting… _Meg, you’re safe, Liv’s safe._ _You’re home,_ he says , willing me not to lose myself. _You are a Pure Blood Alpha now. No one can touch_ _you,_ _without you_ _sayin_ _’ so._ _You’re_ _free…_  

 _I’ll never be free, Omi! I’ll never be…_ He slowly approaches me; a brave soul stepping into a desolate tigress’ territory. _We’ll never be…_ my breaths desperately shallow. _Breathe..._  

 _We can and will be…_ _T_ _hat_ _videos_ _already got_ _31_ _million views. People are_ _watchin_ _’_ _,_ _Meg._   

I halt my urgent pacing as shock radiates thru me. _31_ _million?_  

 _31_ _million and counting,_ George adds; hope achingly clear in his, in their eyes. _We can beat them, Alex,_ he thinks wistfully, _knowing_ with every fibre of his being that the world is changing as we speak. _My study participants are getting together_ _;_ _connecting,_ _transitioning_ _together. My research_ _h_ _as untold benefits for_ _any_ _one_ _wanting to be free_ _._ _Check out the news…_ my wonderful companion suggests as the pack tries to stave a panic attack that could kill me. 

Huang grabs the remote, the television coming alive with images from the conference… _Donnelly didn’t stop it?_ The images keep coming, confirming to me that the conference wasn’t just aired, televised, viewed but resulted in the entire room of reporters, editors, camera persons having a frenzied orgy… _O_ _h my God…_

 _They forgot to turn their cameras off,_ Omi supplies with a smirk. _They televised_ _some of_ _the most crazy-a_ _s_ _s_ _porn,_ _live!_  

I can’t help but cover my mouth, to stifle the slight chuckle and swallow the disbelief that continues to sit, entrenched in the recesses of my soul. _This surely can’t be..?_  

 _Would we be showing you this if_ _this wasn’t the case_ _?_ George asks astutely. I shake my head, squeezing his arm briefly; quickly realising the conference and video are fast becoming the _only_ news the world wants to see. _E_ _ven_ as my psyche can’t fathom it.  

When one news channel is shut down, (the Alpha Alpha’s desperate attempts to silence an impossibly deafening, rallying cry), another pops up; the world seemingly transfixed by my story.  

I turn to my pack and hug each of them in turn, ensuring Kate receives as thorough an embrace, to relinquish any last doubts in her mind about our intimacy. It’s only then I realise my breathing is under control, my lungs are expanding within normal ranges and my heart is maintaining a steady, healthy rhythm. _Thank you, my incredible pack._  

A stifled cough makes us collectively jump; adrenaline rioting thru my synapses once more. The pack turn towards the sound, as one. _Abbie..._ Guilt riots thru me.  _Breathe, Cabot._  I’d completely forgotten about her, as soon as I was among my own.  

‘Everybody, this is Abbie. She helped me out at the Precinct and then the Supreme Courthouse,’ I explain her presence hurriedly, knowing the pack are shocked and cautious of a stranger in their mist. ‘Omi used to work with Abbie, some years ago, within the SVU unit,’ I voice to ensure Abbie feels involved in the conversation that, I’m ashamed to realise, has been pack member only up until this point. 

Omi takes my cue. ‘Yeah, Tex 'n' I go way back. She's sound. ‘specially now Meg trusts her enough to bring her here,’ he bolsters my confidence. I love him all the more for it. 

Abbie stands routed to the spot as Huang and Kate survey her. George moves first, unsurprisingly being a Beta. ‘Hi, I’m...’ he starts, offering his hand. 

‘Dr George  Huang... I’m _obsessed_ with your work!’ Abbie interrupts, in her haste to fan girl him. The Texan takes it obligingly.  

George turns to me, a smile playing at his lips. ‘She can stay!’ Everyone giggles, snorts, guffaws slightly; concerns for the future bubbling just under the surface.  

‘I’d really like to pick your brains when this is all over...’ Abbie continues, still holding Huang’s hand. 

‘What would ‘over’ look like?’ George asks, intrigued by this new Beta. 

Abbie looks at everyone, her eyes finding and staying on Kate, who’s still assessing the Texan from a distance. ‘When every Omega no longer needs to live in fear, every single day,’ she replies, her voice shaky. 

‘And what will need to happen for that to occur?’ Huang continues to explore this new ally. 

‘Transition, and overthrowing the Alpha Alphas,’ she states passionately, finally returning her gaze to George. As he’s about to speak again, Abbie beats him to it. ‘A lot easier to say then do, but the masses didn’t know what transitioning was until three hours ago. They didn’t know _that_ was an option. A hierarchical wave has been started, that will devastate the AA's,’ she coins, fed-up with using their full name.  

‘We damn well hope so,’ I state, bringing Huang’s interrogation to an end.  

I glance at Kate, who is still unmoved from her station beside my sedated, yet largely injured Alpha. _My Olivia..._ I stop my yearnings as the good doctor meets my gaze. _If_ _you're_ _uncomfortable_ _Kate,_ _I’ll_ _ask_ _her_ _to_ _leave_ _._  

Her emerald eyes shine with unshed tears. _It’s not that. It’s just, after_ _... Donnelly..._ My heart breaks, utterly comprehending Kate’s reticence.  

 _I’m the highest status now..._ hearing myself think this to reassure Kate, truly instils this alien notion into my own psyche . ... _There’s no way Abbie can_ _mind-_ _f_ _uck_ _me_ _and by extension, you. She..._ I loathe saying her name but know I must to reduce the power it evokes. _... Donnelly had the highest status,_ _even though she wasn’t pack Alpha. Now, I do,_ my mind stresses as Kate nods her head in understanding. _Do you trust me?_   

 _With my life,_ she responds at once.  

 _Then know no one_ _will_ _mind-fuck us, again,_ I state with absolute certainty.  

 _Okay,_ Kate acquiesces, glancing towards the interloper once more. _In that case,_ _she might just challenge you to my top spot,_ she admits huskily as she allows herself to dine on the raven-haired beauty.  

 _I’m heartbroken!_ I jest, inwardly relieved Kate has an attainable interest. _And it’s a good thing too_ _because_ _she wouldn’t shut up about a certain redhead,_ _i_ _n the car!_  

Kate stares into my soul. _She didn't try..._  

 _I’m Switzerland, Kate. Abbie’s all about mutual consent._  

 _Fuck me!_ the doctors mind slips before she can harness it.  

 _Somethin_ _' tells me she just might..._ Omi quips as the pack chuckle.  

I glance towards Abbie, who looks anything but comfortable. _Can we guys?_ I ask everyone. 

 _You trust her, I trust her,_ Omi replies instantly.  

 _Same,_ George agrees. 

Kate? I enquire softly, not wanting to overrule anyone’s right to choose. 

 _I just don’t want this instant attraction thing to blind me to any..._  

 _... to possible abuse?_ Kate nods her head. _I completely understand your concerns, Kate._ _.._ _But t_ _he very fact its mutual, speaks of_ _it’s safe nature,_ I explain gently, my orbs seeing only Kate. 

She takes a deep, shaky breath, as she eyes the gorgeous Texan.  _Yes._  

 _Yes?_ I clarify. 

 _Oh yes!_ Kate answers with absolute conviction as I finally turn back to a slightly bewildered Abbie. 

 _Sorry for our delay. Welcome to the pack_ Abbie. 

The attorney is clearly knocked sideways by the invitation, her dark eyes surveying my face with suspicion; her mouth uncharacteristically mute. 

 _You’ve shown yourself to be_ _respectful, loyal and useful_ _,_ I explain as Abbie observes each pack member reactions. 

‘I don’t... er...’ 

 _You don’t..?_ I reflect, wanting to give her the opportunity to decline. 

‘I don’t know what to say,’ she runs her fingers thru her raven mane bashfully, her glee utterly apparent.  

 _Well,_ _I’m assuming you’re happy..._ I test, wanting absolute clarification. 

‘Can I hug you?’ she asks, her face crinkled with the widest grin. 

 _Of course,_ I acquiesce. The Texan near runs at me, throwing her arms around me with an embrace that would have crushed me days before, but now only feels like the looping arms of a child. 

Once Abbie has had her fill of me, the Pure Blood Alpha, she approaches George who is immediately joined by Omi, in a group hug. Feeling left out, I join it. I keep an eye on Kate, knowing exactly what she’s doing, waiting for.  

Once the four of us have physically indoctrinated Abbie into the pack, we release each other and crowd round Olivia, as Kate steps self-consciously towards the Texan.  

 _Hi_  

‘Hi.’ 

 _So._ _.._  

‘Can I hug you too?’  

 _Oh, hell yes!_ Kate realises her mistake immediately. _Fuck! Oh God!_ She leaves the room hurriedly, her cheeks flushing a deep shade of crimson.  

Abbie turns to the rest of the pack in alarm. ‘What the fuck just happened there?’  

Omi, George and I smile broadly. _Mind_ \- _reading has a way of revealing secrets..._ I explain cryptically.  

When she still doesn’t twig, George takes over. _You can hear us, correct?_ he asks, stepping towards the confused Texan. 

‘Yes,’ she admits. 

‘Think it.’ 

 _Okay... shit... fuck... You can hear me_ _too?_  

 _By being invited and accepted into this pack, your mind is now connected to_ _the pack,_ George continues, trying to ease Abbie in gently. _Kate just got a bit_ _hot_ _under the collar, at the prospect of touching you_ _,_ he smirks as Omi and I smile behind him.  

 _Oh..._ Abbie finally clicks. _I better go find her._  

 _You do that,_ I suggest but as soon as Abbie’s out of mind-reading range, I give George a weighted glare. He leaves in the newest members wake as I turn to my Omi, every muscle in my body hurting from stress. 

 _Don’t trust her then?_  

 _Not completely around Kate._ _Until she can prove to me she won’t just take her,_ _our doctor needs a certain level of undetected security._  

 _But you said..._  

 _Yes, she_ _i_ _s about mutual consent. But saying and doing are two different things,_ I think before internally kicking myself, _knowing_ Omi realises this more than most.  

 _It’s ‘kay, Meg,_ he says, to stop my mental beration. He envelopes me in his comforting embrace, his arms encircling my mind, body and soul. 

 _I love you._  

_I love you too, Meg. You’re really somethin'._

_Takes one to..._  

 _No. You’re your own_ _kinda_ _somethin_ _'. Think only_ _Liv has a patch on you._  

I turn my head into his shoulder, to observe my achingly beautiful Alpha; two black eyes and a split lip marring her otherwise exquisite face. 

 _I need some time with my Alpha, Omi._  

 _I got you,_ he whispers, understanding immediately. He gives me one last squeeze and looks directly into my eyes with an expression so thankful, tears spill from my traitorous orbs. My Omega releases me and walks to the door, closing it behind him. 

As soon as he vacates my mind, I calmly sit in the chair next to my Alpha’s bed, clutch her hand to my cheek and start to cry in earnest.  


	25. Reconnect

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex and Olivia...
> 
> For Chely99, Velvet95, Artemiskitty and M ❤

I finally lift my head from my life partners now drenched wrist; her hand still clutched firmly to my cheek, as my cloudy blues spy chocolate bronze. I jolt back slightly, surprised to find her awake considering the sedation meds currently dripping thru her IV.  

 _My heroine_ _..._  

 _My everything_ _..._ our minds whisper, as our eyes, hands and hearts convey all they need to.  

My Alpha immediately peruses me for injuries, evidence of abuse. _They didn't catch me..._ I stress passionately, tears of relief forming in my Olivia's honeycomb orbs. _I did it, Liv. I shared my transition success,_ _l_ _aid_ _o_ _ut a damning case f_ _o_ _r_ _your innocence and vilified... Donnelly,_ I finally say her name after swallowing the suffocating lump in my throat.  

My heroine envelopes me in her arms, a slight whine of pain escaping her lips as her bruised cheekbone drives into my shoulder in her haste to hold me. _You are my_ _shero_ _. You’re fierce, strong, incredible..._ Olivia continues, her features speaking of her awe when she leans back to gaze into my blues, her hands cradling my face. _Do you hear me, Alexandra Frieda Cabot? You have achieved something no other Pure Blood Omega has ever succeeded in doing! Transitioning, sure. But more than that: you’ve faced, survived and now challenged the highest echelons and_ _their_ _most devious monsters, to stand by the_ _mos_ _t vul_ _nerabl_ _e_ _status..._ my love only stops when she is forced to grind her teeth to hold back her ready tears. _God, you’re so damn honourable!_ Olivia drools in an attempt to halt further emotions. _Makes me want to take you, so it can rub off on me!_ she breathes honestly, though the animal longing in her eyes suggests not so honourable intentions.   

My blood surges, in earnest. _Oh Liv!_ my head screams, my lungs instantly attempting to slow my ricocheting heart.  

 _Breathe my life, breathe..._ my Alpha begs as her thumbs stroke my cheekbones. 

 _I’m so sorry..._ my mind blurts as guilt and earth-shattering arousal flood my senses. _I’m so sorry, my..._  

Her eyes bore into mine; her soul completely open and wracked with anxiety. _Did I mess up?_  

 _What?_ Her question takes me by surprise. _No... why would you think that?_ I ask, suddenly realising the ingenuity of her distraction. The tiniest smirk tugs at Olivia's full lips; her devilish orbs utterly consuming my melting core.  

 _Kiss me!_ I demand, my clit ravenous for my Alpha. 

Olivia quickly places a hand between her mouth and mine. I feel her palm tremble as she tries with all her might, to prevent me kissing her. _Remember what Kate said_ _, sweetie_ _... This could kill you..._ she warns, her eyes imploring me to think beyond her bodies _immense_ pull. I realise more than ever, the will-power my Alpha conveyed throughout my time as a Pure Blood Omega. All I want to do is ravage her. 

 _What a way to die..._ I half-jest, half-whimper as I begin nibbling the palm barring me from my ultimate goal: _kissing and taking my_ _love_ _._ When this ploy doesn’t work, I gaze into Olivia’s eyes with the most scorchingly heated expression I can muster. _I’m taking my meds_ _..._ _and I have_ _..._ _Valium_ _... propranolol..._ _sedative..._ I add, twisting the IV line, _..._ _on tap_ _,_ I breathe, fighting _every_ carnal urge to just take her, to _hell_ with her arguments.  

 _Said like a true_ _druggie_ _,_ she quips, that _damn_ trepidatious smile still playing at her lips. It’s then, I know, I have her.   

‘Take that... _useless_ line... out... of your arm,’ I instruct, straddling my Alpha. She acquiesces instantly.  

My love tries to meet me halfway, my face hovering inches above hers as I drink in the absolute magnificence of my heroine; all dusky skin, dark and broody features, heated bronze orbs and achingly prominent cheek-bones. _The most beautiful... sight I’ve ever seen... bar the bruising... and split lip..._  

Olivia swats me playfully before thinking better of it, having used her broken finger hand. _Oww!_ _Shit!_  

I kiss it better before I collapse onto her; my mouth closing around her split lip, as gently as my urges will allow; my lips, tongue and teeth starving for her nutrients as my hands tear at the sheets; nothing but bear skin enough for my tortured hunger.  

My mouth continues to take hers, my desire quickly overriding any gentleness; my synapses utterly overwhelmed by her soul-stirringly beautiful taste. My hands tear blindly at her clothing, hers at mine, until we’re a trembling mass of carnal flesh and torn fibres. _Jesus!_ I whimper into her throat column in an attempt to slow my desperation, but I’m a slave to my rioting urges. My ultimate wish: to dine on Olivia Magdalena Benson, until my dying breath.   

As soon as we’re free from the constraints of our clothing, I retake her mouth ravenously, a low moan breaching her lips in mutual pleasure and pain; my hands searching, finding and teasing her breasts; my elbows my one balance and anchor, as my mind, body and soul hum, shudder and pulsate to one beat: _my Alpha._  

 _Oh_ _Jesus,_ _Lex!_ my heroine cries as I raise her torso until its parallel with mine. I thread my left leg under her right and over the side of the bed, my right over her left. I brush our quivering clits, teasingly. With wavering breaths, Olivia gazes into my soul, wanting to be _entirely_ certain this incredibly intimate, and undeniably triggering, position is my wish. _Are you sure?_ she persists, her need to know she isn’t forcing me so innately entrenched in this beautiful, unique and soul-shatteringly thoughtful Alpha, Olivia barely notices I've engineered it. 

 _I want... you... like this... I need you... like this..._ I stress, in an effort to reassure her, and myself, that this most torturously intimate of positions is not only okay but of my choosing. _Anything not to_ _._ _.._ I freeze. 

 _What?_ my Alpha stiffens instantly, intuitively realising somethings wrong. _Lex..._ she whispers, her bronze warmth enveloping me. 

 _Please..._ I plead, begging Olivia to silence her enquiring mind, _especially_ in this moment.  

 _Sweetie._ _.?_ Unsurprisingly, she gazes into my soul, her features radiating concern.  

Before my Alpha can argue further, I thrust my core against hers; using my dominance to my advantage. Spasms of scorching heat instantly spear our bodies; achingly exquisite pleasure utterly galvanising our inner animals as I gaze into my heroines hooded eyes, daring her to look away.  

Olivia's concern dissipates in waves of excruciating promise; her furrowed brow melting away even as her bronze orbs convey that this discussion isn’t over. _Later..._ she warns, finally acquiescing, causing me to tug her closer. 

She meets and surpasses my challenge; her right hand cupping my cheek, her free arm lacing about my waist, precariously balancing us as we immerse ourselves in the stirrings and crescendos of pleasure that radiate thru our trembling centres. 

I lose concentration, my eyes suddenly lowering in abject shame, as I remember... _Don’t_ _Cabot_ _..._ _D_ _on’t think of..._  

 _My Alpha..._  Olivia whispers for the first time. Her verbal acknowledgement of my higher status completely refocuses me. I  gaze into those honeycomb pools of liquid heat as we begin moving as one; rubbing our mutually starving clits until sparks tease the periphery of our vision; our lusting thrusts promising soul-shattering climax if we just.... 

I grasp my heroine’s nape; my desperation to kiss her absolute. My Alpha submits entirely to my wish, our lips and tongues warring as the whispers of pleasure surge thru the deepest recesses of our souls and riot thru our synapses in endless, undulating waves of insurmountable perfection.  

 _Oh fuck!_ my heroine howls when I lower a hand to her melting apex, my fingers probing her entrance as my thumb tickles her swollen nub. My love collapses into my body, her chin hooked over my shoulder helplessly, as I stroke every last drop of arousal from her quaking form. I nimble her ear and lose myself in the scent of her curls, as my fingers strum my life partner like a finely tuned instrument, orchestrating her pleasure with devastating mastery. 

Only when Olivia’s teeth sink into my flesh, do I lean back to search my Alpha's utterly dazed orbs. _I know a ‘Teflon' when I see one_ _;_ my life so thoroughly taken, she’s lost her voice to the all-consuming pleasure.  

I finally halt my ministrations, my fingers pulling away from her achingly moist apex. I maintain eye contact as I slowly suck her scent from my fingers. _Delicious!_ I moan as my Alpha whimpers with overt arousal. 

 _Jesus_ _Christ, Lex. You’ll be the death of me_ _,_ Olivia whines as I continue to suck her intoxication from my fingers.  

I luxuriate in this moment; a moment of self-congratulations for taking my Alpha without hurting her, for succeeding in scissoring with few lapses, for not losing consciousness, and for making love to my life-partner without her branding playing a pivotal role in defusing our arousal. _Yes, I am a good, moral, conscience driven Pure Blood Alpha._    

 _Branding?_ _Lex?_ _What..?_  

I begin to shake with the realisation I have just used sex to _control_ my Alpha before I disclose the truth... _Perhaps_ _not so_ _moral!_  

 _Goddamnit_ _, Alex! Tell me before I loss my..._ my love demands justifiably, as my heart renews its surge in my chest. 

‘Please _don’t_ hate me,’ I plead into her neck as I feel my heroine’s arms surround me. 

 _Not possible..._ she reassures me as I dig my hidden mortification out of her collarbone. I wipe my damp face with the back of my hand as I lace the other thru her tousled trellises; Olivia’s powerful arm keeping me balanced. I take several lung-bursting breaths in an effort to calm myself.  _Breathe, my life,_ my one true love whispers comfortingly. I breathe. 

‘Those thugs... _branded_ you,’ I eventually find my voice. ‘They tallied your lower back...’ The nausea almost consumes me as my Alpha pales with gut-wrenching comprehension.  

 _‘The_ tally?’ she asks, swallowing thickly. 

‘Yes,’ I state haltingly, my cloudy blues swimming in response to the anger and despair flashing across my life partner's horrified features. 

‘Did you count...’ Olivia pauses her heinous question, _knowing_ I would have; her beautiful mind thinking _only_ of me. 

I nod my head as further tears trail down our cheeks. I use a thumb to brush away her rivets; observing the emotions rioting thru me, play out across her beautiful face. _I’m sorry..._  

She tugs at my hair, interrupting my apology. ‘You have _nothing_ to apologise for. _Nothing!_ You didn’t _ask_ to be raped. You didn't _choose_ to be born a Pure Blood Omega...’ 

‘And you didn’t _choose_ to be branded...’ 

 _‘Neither did_ _you!’_ my heroine retorts scathingly, lowering her hand to my scarred flesh. I flinch despite myself. Olivia quickly replaces her hand in my hair, her eyes searching mine. ‘I’m sorry, I shouldn’t’ve raised my voice...’ 

‘You _deserve_ to be angry, to be _raging!_ I _am!’_ I howl, the urge to kill Donnelly so strong, I realise it’s the _only_ true escape from her vile, perverted maliciousness. 

My Alpha cups my face, her bronze orbs soft but luminous. ‘We will find him/her, and shove a claw hammer up their urethra!’ she promises breathlessly, as her thumbs wipe my cheekbones. I can see the horror burning just under the surface of her newly controlled facade. ‘The animals will _burn_ for what they did to you!’ 

 _261:_ _one sickos personal tally, amongst the_ _tens of rapists who have succeeded._ This sickening realisation, powerful enough to destroy today’s monumental successes, if not for the hands currently holding me together. 

 _I’m here, sweetie. I will never leave you,_ she promises with every fibre of her being. _We are winning, my life. We. Are. Winning._  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The scars Olivia touches refer to the tally etched into Alex's back by her 261 rapist. It may seem a high number but when you think of Alex being a Pure Blood Omega for 22 of her 33 years, one persons distruction suddenly seems believable.
> 
> I've made the potentially unpopular decision to concentrate on DD:R until it's finished. Writing this, Struggle and Teflon is spreading me a little thin. Also, this is my favourite of the three.


	26. Acquainted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Abbie and Kate get acquainted.  
> Alex and Olivia get thoroughly re-acquainted.
> 
> For Chely99 and artemiskitty <3  
> 

Abbie eventually sniffs out the surprisingly elusive doctor, to a cupboard in the fifth bedroom she enters.  

The raven-haired Texan smiles at the mental chatter she hears as she closes in on the stunning redhead. Her smile quickly fades when she realises Kate will be able to hear her _own_ thoughts, which are currently recalling the radiance of the doctors emerald green eyes and the delicate slants of her cheekbones.  

 _Kate?_ the former ADA's enquiry bursts thru their mutual fretting; as she sits on the bed opposite Kate's hideout.  

 _I’m sorry_ _._ Abbie's heart celebrates the response, expecting no answer. 

 _I am too. So many_ _things_ _have changed in the last 24 hours, I don’t quite know where to start,_ she states hurriedly. _But I know one thing,_ _darlin_ _' and that's that I’ve never felt such a pull, to anyone_ _,_ _before._  

The ‘darlin' endearment causes excitement to spear thru Kate's centre. She knows Abbie senses this. As a result, she can’t quite build up the courage to open the cupboard door.  

 _Don’t_ _worry,_ _darlin'_ _,_ Abbie purposely repeats, now knowing the impact it has on the pack doctor. _I won’t open the door. That’s up to you._  

 _Where did you come from?_ Kate asks the pertinent question. 

Abbie smiles despite herself; her body igniting in ways it began to with Alex, but this time, the Texan realises its mutual. _As Judge_ _Petrovsk_ _y_ _’s_ _most trusted_ _assistant_ _attorney_ _, she tasked me with_ _ensuring Alex_ _heard her_ _out_ _, via rotary phone. It would_ _’_ _ve caused t_ _o_ _o much of a stir, Lena attending the Precinct_ _hers_ _elf._ Abbie explains the events that catalysed her inclusion into the pack. 

 _Lena?_  

 _Sorry, Judge_ _Petrovsky_ _._  

 _So this wh_ _ol_ _e_ _welcomed into the pack thing is purely by chance and.._ _?_  

Abbie knows where Kate is going with this, having heard the conference on the car stereo. _This is about Donnelly_ _,_ _isn't it?_ She feels Kate’s anxiety spike and fights a desperate urge to explore this further.  

 _Thi_ _s is_ _all_ _about_ _fricki_ _ng_ _Donnelly!_ Kate barks in exasperation, suddenly feeling claustrophobic in the confined space. She opens the door a crack, spies Abbie’s location, then steps out of her less than pitiful hideout; something she'd do as a little girl. As useless then as it is now. 

Both women are struck again by the others intoxicating pull. 

 _I’m assuming you're_ _a Beta because I’m not_ _terrified of you_ _._ _.._ Before Abbie can answer, Kate continues with her internal dialogue. _But then, you could already be grooming me_ _;_ _making me think you’re my friend, when in fact you’re..._  

 _Oh Kate..._ Abbie’s heart aches, connecting _exactly_ what the redhead is quietly conveying with the heinous disclosures voiced during Alex's conference. _She assaulted you,_ the attorney guesses bravely. 

The doctor lifts her swimming emerald greens to meet understanding black; her surprise hidden. An Omega’s greatest skill beyond survival? The ability to bury the most depraved experiences within the deepest recesses of their souls... until now. Kate had purposely avoided thinking about Donnelly’s abuse. _Did Alex tell you?_ she asks, before realising the stupidity of her question. 

Abbie waits for Kate to meet her gaze once more, watching her shake her head to clear her mind of such ridiculous notions.  

 _Why are you here, Abbie?_ The doctor frowns in confusion. _I don’t get why you_ _pa_ _ssed_ _the trust test in less than 24 hours, whilst Captain_ _Cragen_ _..._  

 _Because_ _you_ _r_ _leader trusts me_ _. Alex_ _knows I can’t emotionally control her_ _and so_ _by extension, any_ _of you,_ _and_ _she_ _thinks_ _I_ _may be a good match for you_ _, I guess_ _..._ the raven-haired beauty purposely riles the redhead. _Oh, and I assume_ _y’all_ _voted_ _. So_ _,_ _even you want me here really._  

Kate blushes crimson, from embarrassment or rage, Abbie isn’t quite sure. _You bitch._  

 _Definitely rage..._  

 _You stal_ _k_ _in_ _here_ _and expect me to_ _drop to my knees and_ _beg you_ _to fuck me?!_  

 _No, I expect nothing from you,_ the Texan deftly takes the bite out of Kate's challenge. The doctor suddenly doesn’t know what to do with herself. _Just a hope for_ _acceptance_ _,_ _one day_ _._ Abbie stares into Kate's soul. _You may think Betas are immune from all this fucked up shit. But I know_ _what it’s like to be raped_ _._ The redhead actively gasps. _I will never_ _hurt you, Kate. Ever_ _,_ saying this Abbie turns to leave, her senses picking up Huang’s presence for the first time. A wry smile plays at her lips; her mind about to voice her respect at the packs understandable precaution when she feels something touch her wrist.  

The Texan flinches in response to the instant spike in arousal radiating up her arm. _Jesus!_ She turns to find Kate directly behind her. 

 _Stay._  

 

Alex’s POV  

My Alpha kisses my tears away as her safe hands flip us, her body covering mine.  

 _Nothing and no one will ruin this for us,_ Olivia’s wilful mind promises as she takes my mouth completely; our bodies quivering with all-consuming arousal and promised ecstasy. _No one,_ she repeats as she dines on my body; her lips, tongue and fingers everywhere all at once. Her mouth covering one breast, her hands clawing at the other as her fingers dance teasing patterns across my pubic bone; before her expert touch delves into my centre. I explode in wave after wave of soul-shattering pleasure as my love takes me utterly, completely, without mercy. _Oh God!_ I thrust into her palm as she tickles me relentlessly, her fingers coaxing every last ember of liquid heat from my desperate clit.  

I can’t take anymore. I reach for her, fully intending to switch positions and dominate her into oblivion. But my Alpha is quicker. Her incredible fingers suddenly vacate my orphaned breast and proceed to skate across my exposed ribcage, gliding and dipping into my extremely sensitive armpit. My core literally falls apart, imploding, as an unrivalled climax shatters every last vestige of fight and dominance I have left.  

I am utterly helpless as my Olivia takes absolute ownership of my body. She continues to tickle me senseless as her mouth journeys down my abdomen, her tongue trailing a blazing path to my expectant centre.  _P_ _lease!_ I beg. Her mouth acquiesces, latching on to me; her now redundant nails skating up my sides to mirror her other hand, her unbroken fingers skating up and down my ribcage and spidering my armpits with renewed vigour. _Oh Jesus Liv!_ I howl as my frame remains utterly useless and limp under my life partners unimaginably skilled ministrations. Her lips tear me open as her tongue lapses me up. _Don’t... stop..._  

Just when I think this can't get _any_ better, Olivia thrusts her tongue inside me, causing me to scream: _‘Jesus... fucking... Christ!’_ A pleasure I have _never_ thought possible, completely obliterates my senses.  

My mouth hangs open in muted ecstasy as another round of overwhelmingly excruciating orgasms pulverise my entire being.  

My Alpha dutifully continues her onslaught; her need to rid me of my demons, and her hers, so blinding, she takes me like this, for hours; her fingers and tongue working tirelessly to exorcise every entity bar our own.  

I eventually form our safe word, after several attempts at trying; my thoughts distracted by yet another rioting surge of all-consuming pleasure.  

When my love finally withdraws her touch from my thorough ravished form, all I can do is stay put, my arms remaining feeble and weak above my head, my muscles quaking from the pleasure and tickle torture I’ve just experienced. I concentrate on breathing as my Alpha lays down next to me, her arms surrounding my body as she too, strains to recover from the efforts of her most damning domination yet.   

Olivia kisses my temple as I somehow find the strength to snuggle into her.  

 _I love_ _..._ _you, my Alpha,_ she whispers into my hair, as I nuzzle closer. 

 _I love you more... MY Alpha,_ I reply breathlessly, wondering how my heart survived being taken so thoroughly. _I know_ _…_ _I should offer to_ _..._ _wash_ _y_ _ou_ _, but my limbs are just too..._  

 _Later, my life... later_ _,_ the last thing I hear before we drift off into a satisfyingly exhausted slumber. 

 

Hours later, dreaming of being splashed with a bucket of warm water jolts me awake. Only when I blink and try to move, do I realise that I am both immobilised and _actually_ dripping wet. _What_ _the..?_ I attempt to lift my head in search of my Alpha, her scent noticeably absent, to find my head equally immobilised. _Olivia?! My love? Where..?_  

A manically wicked laugh turns my blood cold and my heart to stone.  


	27. Desolate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex is in trouble.
> 
> For Chely99 and artemiskitty ❤

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I triggered quite spectacularly on Monday afternoon, so I felt a need to purge the darkness, which I do via writing. This chapter is particularly heinous (the next maybe too, just to warn you). Trigger warnings apply and I assume for you hardy readers to still be with me, you won't be altogether surprised by the subject matter. 
> 
> Thank you.

I try to call out for my Alpha, but find I can only mumble at best, my mouth gagged with an old fashioned cloth.  

Realisation finally hits me, a cold sweat running the length of my body. _Oh God_ _!_ _Olivia!!_ _Where..?_ _Get these off me!_ I attempt to thrash against whatever I’m bound to but the only movement it allows is in my fingers and toes. _Fuck!_ _Liv? Omi?!_  

Another laugh, closer this time, tells me the owner is standing directly above me. Belatedly, I note I can’t see, having thought I was in a pitch-black room. _B_ _lindfold_ _.._ _!_ _T_ _hey_ _... Get me out of this!_ I order silently, my words muffled by the gag and my mind only useful in pack telepathy. _If you_ _hurt any of my pack, I’ll..._  

‘Oh dear, it appears Alex has had adequate time to figure out her predicament,’ drawls the _obvious_ culprit for my current state. I whine despite myself, my senses blinded, muffled, less than useless,  _against this psychotic bitch!_ ‘Loosen her restraints a little. I want to watch her squirm,’ Donnelly instructs as I feel the taut leather cuffs slacken enough for me to move, to breathe, without feeling like my tendons are being torn apart. 

I try to remain still to avoid giving her the satisfaction she craves. But as soon as I feel her breath against my bear skin, I innately fight in earnest; desperate to escape what I _know_ she has planned. Tears spring to my eyes at the realisation I’m completely naked and helplessly trussed up, presented for her devious will. _Oh God no!_ _Please_ _..._ _don’t!_ I _feel_ her eyes drink in my writhing form as I fight against the leather straps pinning me down.  

 _‘_ _Jesus_ _,_ you’re so sensual Alex...’ Donnelly whispers breathlessly as she trails a hand up my abdomen. I stiffen instinctively; an alien touch violating my flesh. ‘You’re so, so beautiful,’ she husks, nauseating me, her captive. ‘Even more so than your grandmother. I _still_ can’t quite believe I was able to stop myself when I was on top of you,’ she voices her vile truths as I try not to whimper in disgust; Donnelly’s hand now massaging my right breast.  

I growl into the gag, which prompts laughter from more than one source. My already tensed form freezes in abject terror. _Who..?_ _How many..?_ _No_ _!_  

‘It appears one of my surprises...’ _One?_ ‘... has revealed himself. Would you like me to remove your blindfold?’ Donnelly whispers seductively, her mouth millimetres from my ear. My willowy frame stiffens at her proximity. 

She removes it, without waiting for an answer; her face near splitting with glee that she finally has her prize where she wants me. I don’t waste time evaluating the one cert in the room. I immediately notice a man sat on a chaise longue, several feet away. Similar in age to Donnelly, distinguished and important looking: _the Senator husband_ _,_ I surmise as he smiles at me. _You fucking_ _bastard_ _! You_ _murdered_ _my grandmother!_ I howl into the gag uselessly, straining against my restraints in my quest to _hurt_ him. 

I shudder involuntarily as his smile travels the entire length of my form, his tongue protruding slightly as he rakes my body. _Fucking_ _cr_ _eep!_ my mind barks as he suddenly stands. _Not Senator Donnelly,_ I correct myself, remembering Liz once mentioned he couldn’t walk. 

My breathing hitches as he approaches my... _device_ is the only word I can use to describe my current prison.  

‘My wife...’ I pale, my eyes taking in his able-bodiedness. ‘Ah,’ he laughs, reading my expression. ‘Yes, Liz does have a particular knack for lying. She probably told you I couldn’t walk, right? Implied that she’d injured or maimed me after Max Greevey and I raped Agnes to death,’ he states so matter-of-factly, he could be discussing the weather, _not_ the systematic rape, torture and murder of my grandmother; societies most vulnerable woman. 

I quietly simmer, my insides screaming at his obvious sociopathic tendencies, his _complete_ disregard for human life and decency, in favour of his own deviance. I grind my teeth over the gag, to prevent my ready tears from humiliating me. _Breathe Cabot. He wants you_ _angry. Don’_ _t stoke his_ _arousal!_  

‘Well, that’s the same ball Liz fed your mother before we realised she too, couldn’t be tamed.’ _What?_ _Petrovsky_ _was right? How would she..._ My shock delights him as he stands within touching distance. _Don’t you fucking touch me!_ His perma-smile grows wider still as he taunts me, his hand millimetres from my skin, ghosting me. _Don_ _’_ _t!_ I buck in the opposite direction instinctively, causing him to laugh, again. ‘Oh, how we’ve missed you Alex,’ he glances at Donnelly who returns his smile. I freeze instantly, the gag seemingly choking me. 

My heart ricochets out of my chest when his fingertips finally make contact with my collarbone. He shudders involuntarily. _No..._ I heave into the gag, his arousal soul-destroyingly evident.  

‘Agnes and Kirsten couldn’t be tamed either. Well Agnes _did_ give my wife a status hike.’ _Y_ _ou unimaginable bastard!_ ‘If they’d been willing, they’d be alive today.’ _And u_ _se_ _d as transition partners and breeding machines until the moment they_ _di_ _ed!_ I surmise. It breaks my heart to think they are better off dead, than repeatedly experiencing the heinacity of sexual slavery. ‘It's the _willingness,_ you see. It’s the reason we allowed you to grow up, to become a beautiful...’ he cradles my jaw almost lovingly. I turn my head quickly, just missing his retreating fingers. His grating laugh fills the room once more. ‘... capable...’ He grabs me by the hair viciously. ‘... young woman. We knew you’d be beaten down by every pull person in sight.’ He backhands me, causing my neck to whiplash. _Fuck!_ ‘By the time we planned to enter your life, _knowingly,_ we knew you’d be grateful for any kindness...’ _You_ _raped me_ _261_ _times_ _!_ ‘We’d hoped you’d be easily pliable, easily groomed, easily _used_ _;_ well _beyond_ the monthly fuck,’ he sniggers at his equally guilty wife. 

A traitorous tear runs down my cheekbone as I’m forced to listen to these _assholes_ explain why they kept me alive so long. _What do you want? A_ _fucking thank you?_ my head roars; my lungs continuing to batter my ribcage as my situation threatens to consume me. 

‘Check the IV,’ Donnelly instructs her husband as she places her hand over my heart. ‘We don’t want you dying yet, sweetie.’ The endearment is a punch to the gut. _Only my Alpha calls me that. What have you done_ _to_ _her? Where is she? Where’s my pack?_ ‘Our Alex has certain duties to perform before we'll let you go.’ All parties are abundantly aware of what these _duties_ are, what’s _expected_ of me, and how they will _eventually_ , torturously, kill me. 

 _Please... no_ _!_ my head screams as I try to remain still to dull their interest. _Calm_ _the hell_ _down_ _..._ _Cabot. Breathe_ _.._ _._ _Play possum_ _._ I inhale shaky breaths in an effort to gain control of my rioting terror.  

‘Now, you see that mirror over there?’ Donnelly points theatrically. _Oh God_ _, no!_ _Not an audience..?!_ ‘Well, _someone_ has been watching our interactions so far. Shall we invite them in?’ _No! No... no... NO!_ my mind and body utterly disobey me; a gang-rape my worst nightmare. I thrash against my restraints as they smile hungrily at my antics. _Oh_ _Jesus_ _,_ _no_ _!_ ‘I think she’s excited to see who it is. Don’t you, Bernard?’ 

‘Yes,’ he agrees, laughing as he waves at the mirror for the voyeur to join us.  

I continue to fight against the straps futilely, any hope of escape extinguishing fast. _Please... no..._  

I eye the door, waiting for another monster to identify themselves. It opens, followed by a flood to my senses. _Olivia!_ My heart jumps out of my chest as I watch my Alpha, my heroine being pushed into the room, pinned to a similar device to mine, though she is bent forward. I’m afraid to blink in case she disappears. 

 _I’m here_ _..._ _sweetie,_ she immediately consoles me, her eyes seeing _only_ mine as we hyperventilate in mutual terror. _Have they..?_ my love questions, her meaning clear. 

 _Not yet..._ I reply hauntingly, knowing _exactly_ what they plan to do to me, but what of my Alpha? I take in her naked form; covered in welts and contusions, completely pinned; her restraints unrelentingly in their taut hold. _They..?_  

‘They did some of it during transit,’ my Olivia explains aloud how she came by some of her fresh injuries. Its then I notice my love isn’t gagged. _Why?_  

 _You’re the highest stat_ _us_ _in the room, my life._ Comprehension dawns. _Your voice could stop the world spinning_ _,_ my Alpha explains in absolute terms. 

 _What happened?_  

 _They drugged you but kept me_ _conscious_ _, forcing me to watch them_ _enthuse over your body as they st_ _ra_ _pped you down_ _._  

I swallow thickly, the bile invading my mouth. _The Donnelly’s?_  

 _No, their minions..._  

 _How many?_  

 _At least six._  

 _What the..?_  

 _Yeah._  

One of many disgusting thoughts violate my mind. _None of_ _them_ _touched me..?_  

 _I haven’t seen the one_ _they_ _caught_ _pawi_ _ng you since_ _..._ my Alpha’s words make my skin crawl.  _I called for_ _Donnelly_ _as soon as I... I’m sorry_ _,_ _my life._ _Fucking_ _Christ_ _, I’m so sorry..._ Olivia hangs her head in shame as my heart shatters. 

 _Liv.._ _._ I wait for my reason for living to meet my gaze. She doesn’t. My heart shatters into a million pieces. _If you apologise on_ _c_ _e more..._  

‘Okay, I think you’re re-acquainted,’ Liz interrupts our silent mental chatter as I try in vain to re-catch my life-partners eye. _Liv_ _..._ Donnelly purposely stands between us to hide my love from view. ‘You know Detective Olivia _fucking_ Benson caused this chain reaction, don’t you?’ Liz asks me, caustically. _Never!_ my mouth mumbles intelligibly. ‘If you’d woken up with _any_ other person, you’d have run and we'd have scooped you up in our arms and made you ours, _forever._ _’_ I groan with core deep revulsion, my every pore screaming for my Alpha, for my pack, for all this to _just_ _stop._ ‘But this one...’ Donnelly swiftly turns to my heroine. ‘... _th_ _is_ one just _wouldn’t_ die! Not during ‘Hell’, not during the ‘Second Hell’ and not _even_ now.’ Liz focuses all her attention on my Olivia. ‘You fucking _ruined_ our...’ 

‘Did you order Alex’s gang-rape so you could ingratiate yourselves into her life, slowly grooming her to be what you always wanted: a supposedly _‘willing'_ _,_ transitioning, breeding machine?’ my life partner voices bravely, interrupting Liz's diatribe.  

Both Donnelly's smile at my detectives astuteness. I feel the desperate urge to vomit, my insides heaving at the possibility. _No..._  

'We only needed her willing _until_ she entered the pack. Once indoctrinated, we would have forced her absolute submission, like Kate,' Liz's nauseating response causes me to pull against my restraints in pure rage. 'It was hard to decide to share her. Alex had been solely ours for over a decade when we felt the time was right too...’ 

A sick laugh bubbles inside me; it’s power so great, it bursts thru my lips, shocking everybody. _Y_ _ou’re really that arrogant to think others weren’t raping me in between times? To think I would willingly go with you?!_

‘What’s she saying?’ Donnelly asks, reading the signs of our telecommunication.  

‘Perhaps remove her gag so she can...’ 

‘We think not,’ Bernard speaks for the first time in a while, his eyes consistently trained on me; a wolf stalking his prey. _If you touch_ _her_ _..._  

‘I almost took you once, Olivia,’ Liz confesses, drawing even Senator Donnelly’s avid attentions.  

‘What?’ my Alpha’s shock permeates my soul. _My love..._  

‘In a normal, non-status world, you’d actually be more my type. All dusky hews, short brown curls and the most kissable lips I’ve _ever_ seen,’ she licks her own as she admits this. ‘But alas, Alexandra Cabot, _anything_ but a plain Jane herself, gives off one _hell_ of a pull. The clit wants what the clit wants,’ she finishes with a devious smile.  

 _‘Fuck you,_ you _fucking_ bitch!’ Olivia snarls as Liz approaches her at speed. She nods to her husband who grabs Olivia’s head, stabilising her as she ravages my Alpha's mouth; chewing her lips, forcing them apart and violating her enthusiastically. _Stop,_ _goddamnit_ _!_ _Stop it! Take me!_ Senator Donnelly continually wrenches my lovers hair to force her compliance.  

I watch in muted horror as my reason for living is abused by our captors. _Get the hell of_ _f_ _her!_ _You fucking degenerates!_ Rage utterly consumes me as I thrash against the straps preventing me from protecting my Alpha. Tears race down my cheeks as I watch a scene unfold that I didn’t _ever_ think feasible: my love being forcibly kissed by Judge Elizabeth Donnelly. _If you don_ _’_ _t get off her right this instant, I will kill you!_ I threaten uselessly, the gag muffling my words. _Get off her! Don’t touch her, y_ _ou_ _sonofabitch_ _!_ _You’re dead_ _!_  

Finally, Liz comes up for breath. ‘I can’t tell you how long I’ve waited to do _that!'_ she states huskily, wiping her mouth gracefully as she eyes my reaction.  

I’m fighting against my restraints so vigorously, Senator Donnelly races over to up _whatever the fucks in my IV._ I feel a haze overcome me. I stop writhing almost instantly. The drugs calm my heaving chest, even as my Alpha helplessly whines; the sound so utterly heart-breaking, I know we will die here.  

 _Lex?_ my Alpha checks in, _forever_ my heroine, even following her own violation. 

 _I love you,_ I stress with every fibre of my being as the Donnelly’s switch their full attention to me.  

 _No, my life. We’re not going to die here!_ Olivia promises, fisting her hands and curling her toes, craning her neck in a ridiculous attempt to free herself.  

‘And now for the main event,’ Liz states ominously, her entire body turning utterly predatory; her hungry hazel orbs drinking in the effortless beauty of her prey.   

‘Stop! Don’t _touch_ her! Take me! _Fuck_ me instead!’ my incredible Alpha howls, trying to play on Donnelly’s now obvious attraction. 

Her pleas fall on deaf ears as both monsters pounce on me. _No..._ I croak, feeling strangely calm, sedated, as they begin feasting on my body.  

‘This’ll... be the... first time... you'll see me... as I love you... and me you... my beautiful... girl,’ the Senator whispers haltingly, his breath already catching and consumed by extreme arousal.  

I don’t know why but his phrasing amuses me. _As you love me?!_ I choke on a half-laugh, half-sob as I watch him remove his clothing.  

‘Now, I've heard... a certain kink... gets you in the... mood...’ _Oh God!_ ‘So Liz... is going... to... tickle you...’ _Please_ _, no_ _!_ _Please don’t._ _.. How the..?_ Dawning soon breaks me. _She used to listen..._ I close my eyes in utter desolation. ‘We know... you’ll... enjoy this,’ he promises sickly as he tweaks the IV. 'Don’t... want you... missing... out on... any of the... sensations now... do we,’ he stage-whispers into my ear as he climbs on top of me. _No..._  

I listen to my Alpha screaming blue murder as Liz's nails, and the Senator’s penis, violate my mind, body and soul. 

...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Max Greevey was Cragen's partner in SVU.


	28. Taken

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex's and Olivia's torture continues.
> 
> For artemiskitty, Chely99 and M ❤
> 
> Trigger warnings!!!

_Please!_ _Stta_ _h_ _a_ _h_ _awwwpp_ _!_ _!_ I scream uselessly as Liz's skittering nails prevent me from disassociating from the horrors currently being inflicted on my mind, body and soul. 

My Alpha is submissively quiet following my insistence she saves her strength. Olivia's protests will do nothing but arouse my rapists further.  

Senator Donnelly’s thrusts alternate between rabid and non-existent, as each orgasm consumes him. His filthy mouth whispers lecherous platitudes between ravenous bites of my lips, jaw and neck. _He's_ _literally eating me_ _..._ I realise sickeningly, wincing as he sinks his teeth into my throat for a third time, _hurting_ me.  

I tremble and jolt with each thrust, bite and tickle bestowed upon me. I whimper in utter anguish, causing Liz to refocus her attention, from her tortuous endeavour, to my tumultuous features; her hazel orbs blazing with unextinguishable desire. I break eye contact to stop my remaining hope draining away. 

I know he won't last much longer. Having identified himself, I remember _every_ detail of his never changing MO. That is until tonight: I’m lying on my back, not my front. But otherwise, his larger than average penis thrusts punishingly into my centre, before halting from over-stimulation and exertion; before he rapes me again. 

 _Oh God_ _,_ _stahahahap_ _!_ my entire being pleads as Liz's nails continue their incessant torture of my sides, ribs and pits. 

Even as they violate me, I leave my most damning judgement and disdain for my own traitorous core. I recognise the tight ball of heat knotting my abdomen, the shortness of breath camouflaging my desperate gasps, the slight shake of my thighs masking my writhing hopelessness. _I’m... aroused_ _,_ achingly, soul-destroyingly aroused; the relentless tickling igniting my absolute _need_ for release. _Oh... God!_  

I focus on my rapist in an effort to dampen my arousal, but his face is buried firmly into my neck. I peek at Liz from the corner of my eye as a fresh set of tickles send molten waves of liquid heat straight to my crotch. _St._ _._ _._  

She looks down at me. Her piercing gaze registers the conflict I’m experiencing: _my Judas c_ _lit_ _..._ _is_ _on the edge of_ _..._ _oblivion as my 261..._ _265_ _rapist_ _..._ _repeatedly_ _ravishes me._ Liz smiles devilishly as she renews her efforts to make me cum. She feverishly scribbles her nails back and forth over my rib-cage as she laughs at my predicament. ‘Bernard... stroke her... for me,’ she instructs breathlessly, her own arousal undeniable.  

 _No!! No... ho... Don’t!_ I thrash against the straps so aggressively, I almost dislodge him. He grabs my neck painfully, another of his favourite pastimes, stilling me as he lowers his other hand to my ultra-sensitive nub.  

He continues to thrust, she continues to tickle, as my body surfs towards the most soul-destroying sensation a rape survivor can ever face: forced or unwilful orgasm. His thumb strokes me vigorously, as Donnelly’s long nails awaken every _single_ nerve-ending in my non-consenting body. I gasp for breath, desperately thinking of something, _anything_ to distract me from the pressure building within my centre.  

 _Liv..._ I whimper in despair, hating myself for what my Alpha is having to witness, for what my disgusting body is currently feeling. 

 _Let go, my life,_ she whispers. _Let go.._ _. T_ _hey won_ _’t_ _stop until you let go..._ my love suggests haltingly, knowing, as everyone in the room does; I’m about to explode. _I_ _t’s a natural, physiological_ _response_ _..._

Our souls are so inline, Olivia senses the moment I break. My body buckles under the intensely prolonged stimulation. Liz continues to rake and dance her nails across my most sensitive nerve-endings, as his thumb coaxes me over the edge of my warn down resolve. I jolt fiercely as the precipice gives way to a crescendo of mind-numbing orgasms, made excruciatingly worse by their tenacious fingers.  

Eventually, they stop. ‘Oh, my... beautiful girl,’ he husks, thrusting his hips one final time before pulling himself out of me. I gasp desperately for breath as soon as he peels himself from my body. I hadn’t realised how suffocating his weight had been until my lungs start screaming.  

I glance over to my heroine, who has been waiting for me to meet her gaze. I feel further drugs being pumped into my system. My body instantly relaxes. 

 _I love you,_ my Alpha stresses, as I try to keep my suddenly blurred vision focused on her.   

 _I... love... you..._ I reply with difficulty, the drugs promising the alluring cloak of darkness.  

 

I awaken to not altogether unpleasant sensations in my abdomen. _Olivia..._ my mind whispers, thinking I’m stirring to my Alphas attentions. 

 _I’m here, sweetie..._ her voice a sob at best. 

 _Why..?_  

‘Wake up, beautiful girl,’ comes a decidedly male voice, next to my ear. 

 _What the fuck?!_ I jolt awake, instantly remembering our predicament. _No_ _!_  

I scan the source of my current stirrings. Liz is kneeling between my legs, simultaneously licking, suckling and stroking me. I thrash against my restraints to escape her abuse but when the device starts moving, my arms and legs remaining unbroken and untwisted, I truly freak out. _I can't.._ _._ _Stop!_ My body writhes and thrashes against the straps as I’m pinned facing the floor, my arms stretched out in front of me, my waist bent, leaving my rear easily accessible. _Get this fucking thing..._  

‘So much fight yet to break,’ Senator Donnelly whispers, mounting me from behind, squeezing my buttocks and biting my ear. _No! No!_ I fight with all my might but he forces himself inside me with relative ease. Liz restarts ‘pleasuring me' as her husband experiences further orgasms due to my Pure Blood intoxication. 

I've never _hated_ being a Pure Blood more than when Liz stands up in front of me. ‘Bernard?’ her voice radiates dominance. He stops mid-thrust. ‘It’s my turn now,’ she states finitely. _No!_ Senator Donnelly immediately vacates my person; his breaths laboured, his chest heaving.

I feel rather than see my Alpha's seething rage. _If you fucking touch her..!_ I watch as she fights against her bounds so fiercely, I fear she'll hurt herself. 

 _My heroine, please stop, before you hurt yourself. Please be quiet and still. I won't survive this if they hurt you._ Olivia orbs convey such heartbreak, I almost die.

'Plug in your IV, rest for a while and watch your wife dominate _her_ Pure Blood Alpha,’ she instructs in no uncertain terms, leaving me naked, trussed up and helpless to however Liz decides to abuse me. _Don't touch me!_ my mind and body yell as everything slows down. My visual acuity intensifies, my ricocheting heart stops and my lungs shrivel as my adrenaline fuelled senses enter the realm of absolute fight or flight state. _Stay alive._  

I stare at the woman about to molest me; already the cause of so much pain. She stares back, her face flushed with blinding, all-consuming arousal. Donnelly licks her lips as she approaches me. A switch flicks, igniting my entire being once more. I thrash in earnest, desperate to escape the inevitable as her hand ducks inside my armpit, all five nails suddenly tickling me senseless.  

I laugh and sob into the gag as she begins to remove her clothing. Somehow, watching a woman hell-bent on raping me undress herself, seems that much more repugnant than observing a man do the same. _Especially_ when said woman _used_ to belong to a similar brethren of raped Omega's.  

 _What happened to you?_ I ask through the gag, knowing she catches the gist of what I’m saying. She smiles, as she stands naked before me, huge scars covering a large proportion of her body; Liv's member attached to her person.. _You bitch..._ I snarl, baring my teeth over the gag. 

‘I met your grandmother. Before Agnes, I’d only ever experienced the abusive side of the societal hierarchy. As soon as she walked into my office, I realised what my rapists had meant,’ she explains seemingly honestly. ‘It took _everything_ for me _not_ to jump over my desk and ravish her. What’s worse is she knew it.  

‘It takes it out of you: being _good_ and boundaried around lower status, pull people.’ She looks to my Alpha. ‘You’re an incredibly rare breed Olivia, possibly more so than Alex herself. Being able to _wait,_ to heed, to control yourself, takes _everything._  

‘I do often wonder if Alex hadn’t wanted you, whether you’d have taken her anyway, eventually,’ she smiles, remembering a fond memory. ‘I can’t tell you how many times I touched myself to that thought,’ Liz admits grotesquely, lowering her hand to my apex. I stiffen instinctively as her fingers begin stroking me. ‘But alas, it’s something we’ll never know,’ her tone conveying her disappointment as her free hand delves into her own arousal. ‘I’d have sat .. front row and centre... to watch you... rape her,’ Donnelly gasps as her entire body trembles, coaxing herself closer. I sense my Alpha's ongoing and desperate struggle to submit to my earlier request. ‘They’d have... been... a war for those seats... _H_ _ence_ the viewing... figures on your... gang-rape video,’ Donnelly husks breathlessly, fantasizing openly. I have the overwhelming urge to vomit, my gag sodden with saliva, blood, sweat and tears, as my body attempts to rid itself of the disgust poisoning my veins. 'There’s only one thing... better than watching, and let’s... be honest... I’ve watched him rape you... _every single time_ _,’_ Liz confesses nauseatingly, as she shudders under the weight of her fantasies. ‘From the moment you turned 11, until now... _I_ _’ve_ been in the driving seat... Not him... not you... not her,’ she looks to my Alpha as she strokes herself thru an exquisite orgasm. 

I already knew this, but for her to state it so excruciatingly plainly _whilst_ getting herself off, causes me untold anguish. _You unimaginable bitch!_ _I was a child... a fucking child!_ I thrash against the straps once more. 

 _My life, we both knew this..._ Olivia tries to console me. 

 _I know. I just... I can’t stand it! I_ _can’t_ _stand this! I’m losing it... I’m...._  

 _Breathe_ _, sweetie_ _. P_ _lease!_ _I’m here and I will remain here, with you, until we escape this fucking place._  

_Quiet, my Alpha. Please!_

I begin to feel the now familiar effects of the drugs relaxing my mind and body; Donnelly preventing me from escaping into the alluring darkness, prematurely. 

Once I’ve calmed down sufficiently, my breaths relatively even and my ire under control, Liz flicks the IV. ‘I’m going to take your mate, Olivia. And you’re going to watch me do it,’ she states unnecessarily as she eyes my tied up Alpha. I shudder involuntarily as she steps behind me and parts my cheeks, running a finger over my clit and opening. She places Olivia’s member against me, rubbing me teasingly. _Another mind-fuck;_ _raping me with my Alpha's double-sided dildo._

I close my eyes as she thrusts inside me, leaning her body into mine to increase her depth, until she meets and shatters my cervix. She pulls on my shoulders to further her violation, until she can’t physically burrow any deeper. My mind is suddenly numb, quiet, subdued, as Elizabeth Donnelly: a once trusted ally and pack member, mounts me, succeeding in her one core aim: raping and dominating Alexandra Cabot.  

She moans and gasps into my ear as she wrenches my hair back, to gain easy access to my raw and bleeding neck. She bites me so hungrily, I cry out. Donnelly laps up my blood, galvanising her already arousal infused thrusts to diaphragm stabbing proportions; the dildo pummelling my insides relentlessly as her body quivers, trembles and shakes thru wave after wave of earth-shattering climax; her clit swelling and contracting so ravenously, I _pray_ her evil heart fails her. 

‘Do you... submit..?’ Liz suddenly stage-whispers as she forces my heroine to watch my utter domination by another Alpha. I'm _desperate_ to escape her touch, my restraints but I know to fight now will only cause me further injury. I purposely avoid my Olivia's gaze.  

Her mind-chatter is deathly quiet, scaring me more than any number of raging tirades. ‘DO... YOU... SUBMIT... TO... ME?’ Donnelly howls as she thrusts into me so brutally, I feel blood trail down my legs. I don’t feel the pain, yet. 

I shake my head, my body, my psyche, for all it’s worth; conveying to her just how much I deny her domination, even as she ravishes me to within an inch of my life. She grabs my breasts, tearing and squeezing them savagely as she nuzzles into my neck, breathing in my blood, my scent.  

I scream as her relentless thrusts begin to shatter any pain soothing properties the drugs had. _God, please stop!!_ I beg thru my gag, as Liz laughs into the skin behind my ear. 

‘I don’t... think so... Alex. I’ve... been wait... ing for this... my entire life,’ she admits hauntingly.  

I glance at her husband, stupidly. IV set up and in use, Senator Donnelly is currently masturbating as he watches his wife repeatedly rape me. I dry heave, as agony, disgust and anguish overwhelm my senses.  

‘There’s a difference... grooming someone... to just all out taking them,’ Senator Donnelly explains unnecessarily as his wife concentrates solely on punishing and breaking down _every_ fibre of dominance, determination and worth my soul possesses. ‘Grooming has its benefits, sure. But giving into your most _basal,_ animal instincts is far more _freeing_ than any amount of groomed Omega,’ he won’t stop his disgusting diatribe as Liz pumps into my battered flesh with such ferocity, I wonder whether she may kill me in one visit.  

I scream and howl in agony as she completely tears me apart, splitting me open; her Super Alpha urges unleashing themselves catastrophically. Years of pent up frustration befalling upon me in a matter of minutes.   

My desperate pleas are ignored as Donnelly claws at my breasts, my abdomen, my neck with ravenous abandon. She buries herself in my depths as another all-consuming orgasm riots thru her synapses. She gasps breathlessly as I wince at the spray of her arousal with every thrust of her buttocks.  

Finally, Liz can rape me no longer, without seriously harming herself. Her husband pulls a quaking, sweat-coated and thoroughly exhausted Donnelly off my back and half carries her to the chaise longue, laying her down and plugging an IV into her arm. He sniggers as he watches his wife doze, a demonic smile spread across her features.  

‘First-timers over exuberance,’ he winks at me, turning my stomach. ‘She’s never allowed herself to let go quite like _that_ before. Congratulations Alex, for igniting my wife’s arousal enough to make her utterly lose control,’ he states sickeningly. 

I dry heave again, as I take stock of my injuries: internal bleeding, torn breasts, intensely bitten neck, torn tendons and swollen joints from my constant fight for escape. I close my eyes briefly during this unexpected reprieve, _knowing_ this is far from over. A half-sob echoes thru the room as I try and fail to control my emotions; the floodgates opening in spectacular fashion.  

Just as I’m about to choke on my liquid laden gag, I feel the fog of the drugs engulf me, dulling my senses. I welcome it. 

 

I wake to a dull throb between my legs and stinging sensations rioting thru my breasts and throat **.** I ache. I hurt. I slowly come round from my drugged haze, stiffening instantly when I find both Donnelly’s standing directly in front of me, seemingly recovered from their last bouts with me.  

‘Do you heel?’ Liz asks ominously, thinking she’s done enough to secure my... _my_ _what? Submission? Is she planning_ _on_ _keeping_ _me alive_ _after all_ _?_ I raise my eyes to meet hers, the icy fire blazing within them enough to convey my absolute truth. _You’ll have to kill me._  

‘I wanted to give you one last chance to submit to me and save yourself,’ Liz says with regret, before she turns to my mute and frozen Olivia. 

I watch in mind-numbing terror as Donnelly positions herself behind my suddenly animated life-partner. _No!_ I snarl as Donnelly rubs _our_ dildo, against _my_ Alpha. _No! No! No... NO!_  

 _Don't, Lex. I can take this..._ Olivia whispers, completely offering herself up to save me from further abuse.

 _Jesus, Liv!_ I whimper, my heart breaking all over again. 

‘You had your chance, beautiful Alex,’ she states evenly, gazing at me as she wrenches Olivia’s head back, pulling her hair viciously. ‘Surely, you understand it would be an _utter_ waste, _not_ to mount and dominate _both_ of you, considering the vulnerable position you find yourselves in?’ she asks seriously as my Alpha thrashes against her hold. _‘_ _Aching_ for the taking, huh, Bernard?’ Their laughter splinters my psyche as I desperately grasp for something to save us. _My voice..?_  

‘Yes, my sweet. Quite literally,’ he quips as he points his erect penis at me, conveying _exactly_ who he intends to take next.  

As Liz begins forcing herself into my Alpha, the Senator approaches me with carnal intent. _No!_  

Something snaps inside me. I instinctively go limp, allowing the cloying gag to choke me. Both Liz and her husband immediately rush towards me to halt my escape from their torturous fantasies, too soon.  

As soon as my mouth is freed from the _disgusting_ gag, I yell: ‘Stay the _fuck_ away from my Alpha!’ 


	29. End Game

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex and Olivia fight for their lives.

The force of my voice stuns everyone, _including_ me. Each body and mind momentarily freezes. However, one thing _every_ Omega, _especially_ a Pure Blood Omega, learns from puberty: _quick thinking._  

‘Untie Olivia,’ I find myself instructing, hating that I’m directing them her way. But I know to order them to release me first, _would_ lead to their deaths. I am absolutely certain of this fact.  

Every tendon in my body tenses to snapping proportions as Liz takes a little longer to acquiesce, to move. _Please!_ my mind begs. She finally joins her husband in releasing my shocked Alpha. I swallow thickly as Olivia’s chocolate bronze meet my cloudy blues, absolutely stunned she's been untethered from her (our) worst nightmare.  

Before I can form another coherent instruction, my love launches herself at them. _No_ _!_ _Liv!!_  

 _You’re dead!_ her mind howls, her fist pummelling Bernard’s face multiple times; eventually causing him to fall backwards over the chais longue. My heroine then turns her attention to our nemesis, the bearer of _pure_ evil and insidious heinacity. Olivia's chest billows magnificently as her dominance, strength and seething rage ooze from her every pour.  

 _Jesus!_ I swallow, knowing now is _not_ the time to celebrate my bodies continued libido. 

My Alpha charges Donnelly; knuckles connect with flesh and bone in a battle that shakes the very foundations of this building.  

 _Stop!_ ‘Release me,’ I demand; as much to free myself from my imprisoned vulnerability as to stop my Alpha beating these _disgusting_ degenerates to death, _or_ being beaten to death _._ _I want them to suffer, yes._ But _even_ more than _that_ _,_ I want the Supreme Court Judge and Senator elect to experience the realities of surviving general pop, up close and _extremely_ personal. They won’t last a month. 

Being hierarchically lower, Olivia and Donnelly halt their dogged battle, to unbind me. Its jarringly bizarre observing them working together to unshackle me. As soon as I’m freed from the straps, I jump from the device and promptly collapse to the floor, silently screaming in agony; the IV pulled out with this one movement. 

 _My life..._ Olivia hurries to my side, lifting me to my feet and supporting me to the suddenly blocked door. All five of Donnelly’s remaining minions stand glassy eyed, leering at us: two devastatingly naked women. We stop dead. _Fuck_ _!_  

 _No_ _!_ ‘Move!’ I bark, arrogantly expecting them to submit, as Liz and Bernard had. They don’t.  

A spine-tinglingly, gleeful laugh causes my skin to pimple and my hackles to rise. ‘Oh Alex, you really think we’d not planned in case you ungagged yourself?’ Shivers of revulsion near consume me as their goons herd us into the back corner of the room. ‘They only submit to me,’ she states evenly as she eyes our nakedness with surprising hunger, her desire not yet sated. ‘I promised them a turn with _both_ of you, once we’re thru,’ she smirks sickeningly. ‘I can’t retract my side of the bargain, just so you can go _prancing_ off into the sunset,’ she smiles and shakes her head as though the notion is ridiculous. ‘We’re _nowhere_ near finished, ladies,’ she eyes us like prime cuts of meat. ‘I’m going to have you,’ she promises, looking at my Alpha. ‘Then I'm going to utterly _ruin_ you,’ she sighs happily, looking at me, as though raping a non-consenting woman is her favourite pastime. My abdomen constricts painfully in revulsion. 

‘How many others have you assaulted?’ I query shakily, my heroines powerful shoulders keeping me standing. My legs feel like jelly. _F_ _rom the drugs_ _?_ _From the repeated assaults? Probably._  

‘I wasn’t lying when I said I hadn’t in a long time, before Kate. Not since your mother...’ 

‘You raped my mother?’ 

Donnelly looks at me disbelieving. ‘Sometimes I fear I give you more credit than you deserve, Alex,’ she chuckles briefly, apparently giving her orders telepathically, as three of her goons grab me, the remaining two, my Olivia. The feel of their hands on my naked flesh causes my stomach to revolt quite spectacularly. I double over and vomit my stomach contents on to the floor. My abdomen aches from the numerous assaults; made worse by my current retching as these goons drag me back to my device. _No!_  

I watch in pained horror as my Alpha is similarly dragged back to hers; her goons punching and kicking her as they struggle. _Think Cabot!_ We both know if we’re tied back down, we won’t escape again.  

‘Order them to stop, Liz,’ I state earnestly as they pin me against the stirrups.  

‘Stop..! _Fuck!!’_ Liz growls the second utterance vehemently, as she watches her own goons desist in their task.  

I lay there prone, as does my Alpha, attempting to _stay_ one step ahead of the delicate balance keeping our hope afloat. I’m aware I can’t walk, let alone run, and my love is too weakened to carry me out of here. I have avoided the truth that I’m bleeding, from numerous sites; this frozen moment in time, my first real opportunity to assess just how badly injured I am.  

 _Stay with me, my life..._ Olivia begs softly as my rapidly clearing mind becomes aware of every ache, burn, bleed and puncture. I cry in agony internally, though only my Alpha hears me. _I can’t move, Liv._ My heart, my mind, my body, my soul can't _stand_ the idea of another violation. 

 _I know..._  

 _Liv..._  

 _I know..._  

‘Tell them to back off,’ I demand, breathing a sigh of relief when the group of five step away from us.  

‘No telepathy,’ I further instruct as Liz glares at me admiringly. ‘Only communicate with me.’ 

‘You clever little bitch,’ she acknowledges thru clenched teeth as we enter a taut phase of stalemate: All nine of us frozen, seven ordered, two weakened, one (me) writhing in silent agony. ‘Where do we go from here, radiant one?’ Donnelly unwillingly spouts her inner workings.  

 _I don’t... know..._ I reply silently, the pain from my injuries becoming unbearable.  

‘All we need do is wait for Alex to lose consciousness, then we're back in the game people,’ Liz voices her plan as she and her pack watch me struggle, their eyes conveying their excitement as the balance begins to shift again. 

 _No!_  

My heroine picks herself up from her own device, with effort, and approaches me. She fiddles with the IV before finding a vein and plunging it back into my arm. The drugs have the desired effect. I no longer feel pained, my heart no longer feels strained, my mind.... 

Olivia checks the dose to prevent me from losing consciousness, so making my instructions void. My mind and body float between a space of no pain, and a determination to stay conscious. _Stay awake, Cabot!_ I'm aware my Alpha reconnected my IV, primarily to prevent me suffering a heart attack. But I feel too unfocused to be of much use. _Focus!_  

Tensions rise as the Donnelly pack sense this too. Olivia flicks the drip again, desperately trying to find the appropriate dose. _Shit!_ I hear her growl as she struggles to keep one eye on the devious pack whilst fumbling with the IV. 

Liz chuckles as she watches my Alpha haphazardly fight to keep me conscious, _and_ alive. ‘It seems the Misfits pack is having a bit of a hard time keeping their heads,’ she drawls; her senses picking up _every_ bead of sweat, _every_ fluttering heart beat, _every_ adrenaline spike. ‘A few more minutes boys, then their _ours,’_ she husks, licking her lips as I fight with _every_ fibre of my being to stay conscious.  

 _Liv... stop... the drugs..._  

 _You’ll die without them._  

 _We... don’t._ _.._ _know_ _..._ _that..._  

 _I do!_ my Olivia argues with absolute certainty. 

 _You..._ _won't..._ _escape if._ _.._ _I lose..._  

 _You won’t survive if_ _I stop the IV..._  

 _Liv... I order... you... to_ _..._  

 _No!_ my Alpha howls, breaking my fragile heart. _I won’t leave you!_  

Tears race down my cheeks as my drug addled body fights to give my life-partner one chance to escape. _Run... my love... Run!_ I watch, my soul shattering, as Olivia struggles to fight my dominance. _Run!_ The conflict rages on in her eyes as her every muscle battles to stay by my side, whilst her lower status forces her to submit. This conveys the strength and determination of my love, to _still_ be by my side, her hand clutching mine as her dominant Alpha orders her to leave, to save herself.  

 _I can’t..._ she begs me as deafening footsteps from the corridor, (the door left wide open by the inept goons), signals further Donnelly reinforcements.  

I snuggle into my Alpha; her arms enveloping me as we wait for our fate.  

 _Meg! Liv!_ _Fuck!_  

 _Alexandra!_  

 _Alex!_ _Liv!_  

 _Fucking Jesus,_ _Bignuts!_  

 _Alex! Olivia!_  

‘Alex!’ 

‘Miss Cabot! Liv! Stay the _fuck_ back, you _fucking_ animals!’ 

Darkness. 


	30. Endgame: Finale

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The packs confrontation isn't the only battle on their hands.

Olivia's POV

As I watch Don and Fin step forward, weapons in hand, I feel my life go limp in my arms. _Fuck!_ Someone squeezes my shoulder. _Kate._  

 _You need to let her go so I can examine her, Liv,_ she cajoles as I hug Alex fiercely to my chest. _Liv, please!_ I look at the achingly silent stand-off between our pack and _hers._  

 _I can’t let her go..._ I admit, my heart breaking at the thought of anyone touching her _ever_ again.  

 _Then, at least let me_ _listen to her chest,_ Kate suggests urgently. 

I acquiesce, knowing to hold her like this may cause my very worst fears to come true. _I can’t lose_ _her,_ I whimper as the doc puts her stethoscope to my life's chest. Milliseconds pass. Her face pales. I suddenly feel painfully sick. _What... Kate?_  

 _She’s not breathing... let her go, NOW!_ I relinquish my Alpha immediately. Kate starts chest compressions as soon as my life is laid flat on the floor. _We... need... to... keep... her... heart... pumping... until... an ambulance..._  

 _Fuck!_ my mind screams as her words sink in. _Is she..?_  

 _If I don’t... keep... this..._ _up_ _, yes!_ I swallow thickly as my soul plummets to the floor; watching tears escape Kate’s lashes.  

Even as my heart shatters, my lungs seize and my soul dies, my practical cop brain engages. _I’ll call a bu..._  

 _Already... done, Liv_ _. J_ _ust_ _put this over her nose and mouth, and squeeze every 12_ _th_ _compress_ _,_ she near orders, passing my an airbag. 

 

At the same time (Third Person POV)...

‘We're not armed, Captain. So put your toys away before pandemonium ensues,' Liz drawls arrogantly as her husband (with bloody nose) and five other pack members lean forward threateningly.  

‘I think not, Liz, considering without them, I know you’ll cause havoc,’ Don responds, his gun aimed at her chest.  

‘I already have, or haven’t you been taking note,’ she smiles sickeningly; her eyes momentarily shocked to find Kate and Olivia giving Alex CPR.  

Cragen, Lena and Tony turn to survey the scene; the pack members already fully aware of the devastating events happening directly behind them. 

Liz and her minions take this opportunity to strike. Bernard heads straight for Cragen as Liz and Lena crash into each other. Abbie, Fin and Huang battle the remaining goons as Tony records, his camera operating from the moment he entered the room. He soon realises his need to prioritize his physical presence, as he watches Alex's pack being matched by Donnelly's goons. He secretes his camera up himself (a trick he’d learnt to preserve sensitive material) before he tears one of the minions off Huang.  

At any other time, Tony would have found the psychiatrists vein attempts at fighting humorous. Right now, his lack of ability is weakening the packs chances. Fin notices it too. _Liv, you gotta let G take over. Fuckin' help us!_   George slaps his Alphas hand away, with minimal argument, falling in step with Kate’s compressions easily. 

Olivia sees only one person. _I’m_ _going to kill you_ _!_ She launches herself at Donnelly with every ounce of her strength, freeing Lena to more easily pick off one of the goons. The detective slams Liz into the wall, punching her to the gut, causing her to bend over in reflex. _You fucking assaulted my reason for living!_ Olivia screams as she punches and kicks Donnelly with rabid vigour. 

Having knocked out his first minion, Fin looks about him to decide who to assist. Finding no one in absolute dire need of assistance, he kneels beside Kate and takes over compressions; the doctor sitting back briefly to catch her breath.  

Abbie high-kicks her second goon, causing him to stumble backwards in shocked dismay. _Yup! I can take fucking care of myself_ _, asshole!_ She then races to help Petrovsky deal with a fourth as Tony Mills struggles with the last remaining goon. 

Don and Bernard spar violently, knocking everything over in sight and requiring a fierce nudge from Fin, mid-compression, to stop them trampling over his fallen Alpha.  

 _Where the hells the_ _amb_ _... the bus?_ Huang’s mind barks as Kate and Fin scold him with their eyes.  

 _Shush, G!_ They’ve _never_ seen him so rattled. It disturbs them. 

A deafening howl from the other side of the room signals a turn in tables in Olivia and Donnelly's battle to the death. Liz smashes a chair over Olivia’s head. The deranged judge then stands above the pack Alpha like a seasoned hunter, salivating over her kill. She grabs a hidden knife from one of the remaining cupboards, with the full intention of stabbing the unconscious detective. Lena and Abbie rugby tackle Donnelly to the floor, trying _desperately_ to gain control of her dominant form.  

George takes over compressions as Kate squeezes the airbag. Fin turns to survey the room, assessing Cragen’s reasonably matched fight, Tony's annihilation of the last goon and Abbie and Lena's struggle with Donnelly. He races to help them, his boot making swift contact with Liz’s face. It stuns her long enough for him to cuff her hands behind her back. Petrovsky and Abbie look at him, nodding appreciatively as they gasp for breath.  

‘Stay on her,’ he orders Lena, a higher status'd being, as he and Abbie hurry to help Don, Tony quickly following suit; subduing Senator Donnelly with relative ease.  

The pack staggers, kneels or collapses from exhaustion/injury. The only sounds in the room: the haunting compressions of Alex's chest, the airbag and the strained breaths of connected minds. 

 _Where’s the fuckin’ bus?!_ Fin's mind yells as he and Cragen run to Liv's broken body; everybody else taking in the achingly fragile and naked sight of their fallen Pure Blood Alpha, Alexandra Cabot.  

A nausea-inducing scream causes every neck to snap in the direction of its source.  

 _Fuck!_  

 _No!_  

 _What the..?_  

 _How..?_  

 _Don’t!_  

Somehow, Donnelly has uncuffed herself and holds the discarded knife to Lena's throat. 

‘Get off me, you _deviant_ savage!’ she growls as Liz laughs behind her. 

‘I like _that._ Make sure to use it in your paper tomorrow, Tony,’ she quips, eyeing the out-of-breath reporter. ‘And perhaps think about disarming my voice next time, people,’ she suggests light-heartedly as she pushes Lena forward. ‘Now, I’m just going to...’ 

 _‘_ _Enjoy this!’_ comes the dulcet tones of an until this moment seemingly unconscious Olivia Benson, who proceeds to shove a broken chair leg up between Liz's splayed legs. The blood curdling yelp that bursts thru her lips tells of her _utter_ agony.  

Tony, Abbie and Lena take her down; forcibly gagging her with Alex's sodden mouth piece, whilst cuffing her arms and legs.  

 _Help is coming Alex,_ Kate whispers comfortingly as Fin and Cragen check Olivia.  

 _She'll make it,_ Fin informs the pack as his soft brown eyes take in the most harrowing sight he has _ever_ witnessed: his Meg being kept alive by two pairs of tiring hands. 

Just as Kate and George deftly switch positions again, the achingly welcome sirens of several buses allow everyone in the room to _finally_  breathe again.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wish to say a massive thank you to every reader who is still with me. This has been one hell of a heinous ride; more so than even I expected. 
> 
> A special thanks to those who thought this was kudos, comment and/or bookmark worthy. A particularly special thanks to M, artemiskitty and Chely99 for your absolute loyalty and dedication to this series. I hope you know how much it means to me and you'd be welcome in my pack any day.
> 
> Any and all continued kudos, comments and/or bookmarks are very much appreciated.
> 
> Would you like a continuation? Thoughts on a postcard please. If you do, I PROMISE it will be a lighter tale with hope, love and joy, with a smattering of angst. 
> 
> But never fear Struggle and Teflon fans. If a continuation is wanted, I will commence it after the conclusion of these fics. 
> 
> Thanks so much all.
> 
> AW ❤


	31. Full Circle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex wakes up...

I hear monitors, bleeps, whirs. Instantly, I detect the most delicious scent: _firewood and spice._ It was the first scent to overwhelm my synapses when I woke from my park assault. And now its the first scent to surge thru my alveoli as I cautiously open one eye, hoping it's not a dream. 

The bright light stabs my eyeball, my lid snapping shut within seconds. _Jesus!_  

I notice the fierce brightness dim behind my eyelids. I hazard another try. As soon as my orbs latch onto the one being my senses tried to reassure me _i_ _s_ present, my entire frame buckles under a deluge of stored up emotions.  

‘I’m here and well, my life,’ she immediately reassures me. ‘You’re alive. You're in a secure hospital unit,’ my reason for living purrs, her beautiful voice awakening every fibre in my body. 

 _‘Touch_ me, Olivia,’ I plead, desperately wanting our last sensory barrier to be broken. My Alpha’s features flash with uncertainty and yearning. My entire being freezes with bone-crushing anxiety. _What_ _? Liv._ _.?_  

‘Kate said it’s best I don’t touch you for now...’ 

 _Kate?_ I ask, my thoughts immediately focusing on our vulnerable Omega.  

 _She_ _,_ _and everyone else_ _,_ _is fine,_ _sweetie._  

‘Then why? _Goddamnit_ _!’_ I query, fiercely; comforted enough by my Olivia’s reassurance to divert back to the second most pressing issue: ‘Why won’t you touch me?’ _Do you still love me? Did watching her... them assaulting me..._  

My heroine sits down beside me, her fingers within touching distance as she lowers her head, her breaths shallow. 

‘Goddamnit _Olivia!’_ I seethe, my heart breaking as the love of life avoids my gaze. 

My detective takes a steadying breath before she gazes into my soul. _I will love_ _you_ _until the day_ _I_ _die. Nothing and no one will ever diminish an ounce of my love for you_ _,_ her thoughts sear my psyche, warming my every fibre. ‘Don’t _ever_ question my absolute adoration for you, Lex. You are my Alpha, and I am yours, as one, _forever,’_ she near barks in her impassioned haste to reassure me. ‘And the reason I can’t touch you right now is because you suffered a massive heart attack that should have killed you,’ my love sniffs as tears flow freely down her face. ‘You officially died in my arms. You died several times over between... _there_ and the hospital.’ Olivia purposely skirts around _there_ _._ ‘We took turns keeping you alive.’ _We?_ ‘Kate had secretly placed you on the heart transplant register months ago. This saved your life.’ I finally begin to comprehend my heroine’s words and actions.  

 _So that’s why you can'_ _t_ _touch_ _me... yet?_  

 _Yes, my life._  

 _Jesus Christ,_ _Liv._ _I love you!_  

I’m utterly aware of my Alphas struggle to keep herself from embracing me, forever. _And I love you_ _;_ _more than_ _food, more than water, more than oxygen. You are my_ _one source of_ _total_ _replenishment._  

I ache to touch her, for her to touch me. But I realise I am lucky to have this much: _my life, with my_ _incredible Alpha_ _._ _Our_ _pack?_ ‘You said our pack was..?’ 

 _‘Is_ strong, incredible and _desperate_ to see you. But I think it’d be too much for one day...’ 

‘What happened, my love?’ I ask, out of the blue, taking my heroine by surprise.  

‘Sweetie, perhaps now...’ 

 _‘Stop_ treating me like I’ll break, Olivia! The Ashton’s and that Daniels freak couldn’t break me, so be under no illusions that _this_ will,’ I bark frustratedly, causing an infuriating smile to dance across my Alpha’s features. ‘And _stop_ looking at me like that!’ I snarl, equal parts loathing and loving the impact this one expression has on my soul.  

Olivia inhales a deep breath, to steady herself. ‘Fin, Petrovsky, Kate, Abbie, Huang, Tony and Cragen came, in the nick of time...’ 

‘Lena?’ 

‘Yes, Abbie contacted her as soon as they realised we were missing. Fin told Don, who in turn got hold of Tony Mills, to ensure the world knew of our plight and subsequent...’ my Alpha stops herself, worried she may trigger me. 

‘How’s the world looking?’ 

‘It’s turning into a different place, sweetie. All because of you. And in case you’re wondering, Donnelly and her hound are awaiting a trial date.’ 

My chest heaves as my emotions consume me once more. I watch my Alpha’s entire body keen to console me and feeling utterly helpless because we know she can’t. 

 _I love you, my_ _incredibly strong,_ _beautiful,_ _kind,_ _pig-headed_ _master_ _m_ _ind of_ _an Alpha._  

 _I love you, my_ _stupidly brave, loyal,_ _compassionate,_ _gorgeous_ _and achingly_ _powerful Alpha._  

 

I wake to find Kate above me, checking my saline drip; my Alpha asleep in the chair beside me. The fresh smell of a meadow washes over my senses. I know I won’t be allowed to touch her either. Our Omega jolts slightly when she realises I’m awake. A quiet sob escapes her lips as she takes in this moment. My own chest heaves as I gaze into her emerald green eyes. _Kate..._  

 _Don’_ _t speak or think_ _... Just rest..._ _Y_ _o_ _u shouldn’t be a_ _wake..._  

 _Kate, how can I ever..._ _Did she, they hurt you?_  

A lone tear flows down her cheek. _Not_ _this time,_ she answers hauntingly. _I hope you don’t mind me doing what I did. I just couldn’t imagine you agreeing to it..._  

 _You’re right, I wouldn’t have, being a pig-headed ice queen_ _,_ I only half joke as a sad smile falls over Kate’s features. _You’re the reason I’m alive. One of several reasons_ _,_ I acknowledge as tears race down my cheeks. _How can I ever thank you?_  

 _Do you have any idea what you have done for_ _me_ _since we met?_ Kate asks me seriously, her features aghast at my humility. _You’ve saved me from numerous rapes, by your mere..._

 _That was Olivia,_ I argue not unjustly. _And Donnelly_ _happ_ _..._  

Kate stamps her foot in exasperation. _For Gods..._ she inhales several deep breaths. _You_ _pu_ _t Bob Ashton away_ _;_ _the_ _sonofa_ _b_ _itch who_ _almost killed me. You_ _enlightened the world of our plight and have forever changed the_ _hierarchical_ _map with regard to the treatment of Omega's. That enough for you?_  

I frown, finding weakness in _every_ counter-argument I try to formulate in my head. _How_ _are_ _you?_ I ask, wishing to check in on my Omega, following her coming face to face with her rapist (Donnelly) during our rescue.  

She instantly shrugs off my concern. _I’m fine. More importantly, how are you feeling... physically?_  

 _Is Abbie treating you well?_ I enquire, wanting to ensure Kate isn’t missed, ever again.  

The doctor blushes crimson at my highly invasive question.  

 _Good blush or bad blush?_ I persist, absolutely mortifying her. She stares at me for a long moment. 

 _A good blush, okay!_ my Omega snaps, shaking her head. _Bloody attorneys!_ she groans inwardly, turning away from me. _Now you! Physically, how do you feel?_  

I mull over her question, quickly conducting a full body assessment. _I feel no pain_ _but_ _I_ _have_ _some tightness around my heart_ _,_ _and my lungs feel a_ _little_ _constricted,_ I answer honestly as Kate takes her stethoscope and listens to my chest.  

 _The tightness around your heart is common after surgery but we can medicate that to ease the pressure._ _I’ll give you some more oxygen until your lungs repair themselves..._  

 _What’s the date?_ I ask suddenly, wondering how long I have been unconscious. 

 _It’s November_ _6_ _th_ _. We had to place you in a medically induced coma, to aide your internal_ _healing_ _._ I catch what my Omega is _truly_ saying: the injuries to my _entire_ body, not just my heart post-op. _You’ve been in a coma for_ _nearly_ _two months._  

Kate chooses this moment to put me back under, to stem further anxiety. _No..._  

 

I sense a presence beside me. They don’t smell or feel like Olivia, or Kate. I open my eyes and am met by the warmest black orbs. _George_. 

‘How're you doing Alex? And before you ask, Olivia’s just gone to get some coffee.’ 

I'm instantly reassured as tears sting my eyes. I shake my head, my meaning achingly clear. ‘G, they _forced_ Liv to watch, _everything_ _._ They... they...’ I struggle to form coherent sentences as George’s eyes, and head slant, empathise more than most ever could.  

‘Alex, I will be here whenever you wish to talk. Whether it be now or later. I won’t tell you to rest from your psychological demons, but I do _strongly_ suggest you rest physically. I’ve bought some books and puzzles in case you feel you’re going stir crazy, and _know_ you’re in a secure unit. At least one of us will be with you, at _all_ times,’ he comforts as he lays his gifts on my bedside table.  

 _What would I do without_ _you_ _?_ I sniffle, longing to touch his perfectly gelled hair.  

 _I don’t know quite honestly,_ he jokes, making me laugh before his face turns serious. _Would you like to_ _talk about it?_ he offers, knowing survivors _need_ to talk about it, to start the healing process. 

At this moment, my love returns with two coffees; one for her, one for Huang.  

 _None for me?_ I query, forcing a lighter mood. I know I can’t yet. George takes his cue. 

 _Hey_ _sweetie_ _,_ my entire being floats as Huang elbows our Alpha in the ribs. _Owww_ _._ Olivia immediately comprehends his point: don’t arouse your life partner. _Blame_ _Kate. Doctors orders,_ she explains as she hands G the other coffee.  

George stands to make room for our joint pack leader; his eyes monitoring both of us as he walks to the door. _I’m here guys, always._  

 

I wake to the smell of milky tea. _Omi._ My eyes fly open in my haste to see my dearest friend. 

 _Meg,_ he whispers softly as he sits down next to me, in my Alpha’s chair. My eyes search the room for her. He reads my expression within seconds. ‘She’s home, taking a shower and eatin’ somethin’, _finally_ _.’_  

I turn and give him my full attention. _Omi, can I touch your hand?_ He offers it to me without a second thought. I grasp it urgently, _feeling_ it, _stroking_ it. ‘I _needed_ to _know_ this _i_ _s_ real,’ I explain myself, as he squeezes mine in silent understanding. I bite my bottle lip in a futile attempt to stem my rioting emotions. 

 _Let it out, baby girl,_ he whispers so softly, I can’t help but shiver as my traitorous tears break through the dam once again. _If anyone_ _’_ _s earnt_ _the right to let go, it’s you Meg_ _,_ Omi sniffs as he fails to stem his own. _Fuckin' hell,_ _babygirl_ _. Thought we_ _’_ _d lost_ _ya_ _. Both of_ _you._ Watching this brave, strong, emotionally withdrawn soul cry, for only the second time in our lives together, makes _every_ _single_ hair on the back of my neck stand on end. _I love you_ _,_ he utters, with such raw vulnerability and emotion, I reach for him.

After convincing him, he won't hurt me, he allows himself to be drawn into my arms; both of us purging so many years, so many experiences, so many horrifying traumas. 

 _I love Omi,_ _with all my heart._  

'Careful Meg. You gotta new heart but don't go giving it all to _this_ badass!' he quips adorably, clearing his throat and wiping his streaming eyes, as any softie _trying_ to be a hard-nut would. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I listened to everyone of my lovely commenters. This is an epilogue of sorts to shore up DD:R nicely.
> 
> DD:H is coming... (after Struggle and Teflon are finished). What does the H stand for I wonder?
> 
> Much love. You guys are pawsome!
> 
> ❤🐺🐺🐕🐕🐶🐶


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